


Stockholm Syndrome

by Markov_Debris



Series: Awaiting Universe [27]
Category: Torchwood
Genre: Angst, Dubious Consent, Implied/Referenced Torture, M/M, Spoiler for Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-23
Updated: 2017-11-26
Packaged: 2019-02-05 22:30:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 49
Words: 55,834
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12803781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Markov_Debris/pseuds/Markov_Debris
Summary: Ianto Jones is an ordinary, lonely, bookseller from Newport living a peaceful, boring life until he his suddenly, inexplicably, kidnapped by a tall dark American in a great coat.





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> Oh the whims of fate.  
> This was the first story written in what is now the Awaiting Universe, indeed it was written as a standalone series and you do not have to have read the Company Series or the rest of the Awaiting Universe to enjoy this story (although it does have a sequel, written 2 year later, after the rest of the Awaiting Universe stories were added (making it a sequel to them too).  
> I had the idea for this story when I was writing Company of a Stranger, indeed when I first started posting it I was posting Stockholm Syndrome alongside Returning to the Company (though I decided to temporarily abandon Returning to the Company to concentrate on this story).  
> I was less than half way through writing this story when came that most terrible of events in Torchwood history occured, the broadcast of Children of Earth. Who knows what would have happened if I had started writing/posting this story earlier. Instead I made the decision after a period of mourning (and after having more or less faithfully followed the cannon of the series) that this was going to be my Series 3 and accordingly the ending is different from what it would have been. From this decision came the decision to write and publish the Object (which I had envisioned as a proper novel before I started posting fanfic) and from there the other stories in the Awaiting Universe were born.  
> I hope that you enjoy this alternative Series 3 of Torchwood.

Two months ago Ianto Jones had concluded that he was the most boring man in the Universe.

He’d been on a date with a woman called Gwyneth whom he had met through an on-line dating agency, which really should have been a clue.  She had done nothing but talk about her ex all the way through the starter, then nipped to the loo before the main and not bothered to return.

When the waitress came to tell him the news and offer him a free, commiseration drink he had felt that it was unfair of her to judge him so early.  Then he came to his conclusion and decided that she was probably wise.

Ianto had moved to Newport two years ago after he split up from his girlfriend, Lisa and was made redundant from a job so boring he couldn’t even remember it clearly anymore.  Both had been during the same week, so he could add unlucky to boring.

At first he had just wanted to go home but as he neared Cardiff he couldn’t face the shame of all the great plans he had had when he left coming to naught.  So he diverted to Newport instead.

He had used his considerable redundancy money and his share of the house sale as a deposit for a new and second hand book shop.  There was an apartment above it where he could live and he settled into his boring life.

On market days he only opened after eleven; having first visited said markets to see if they had any interesting books.  He also frequented car boot sales and the occasional antiques market as the second hand side of his business was the more interesting and sometimes more lucrative.

Most of his money was made on-line either through his own website or through others.  It was a global business and it consumed his life.

On that night when he decided he was boring, he also realised what a sad lonely life he had.  The only people he could think of as friends were the market book sellers and local take away owners he regularly did business with.

His break up with Lisa had been so painful that losing his job hadn’t really mattered.  It rather put him off people and it was only three months ago, when he was surprised by a customer coming in and flirting with him, that he realised how isolated he had become.

Yet he couldn’t bring himself to go out to pubs and clubs, which is why he had resorted to on-line dating.  After his disastrous dinner with Gwyneth he decided to give up on that to.

That meant that Ianto Jones was destined to be lonely as well as boring and unlucky.

Today was just another ordinary day as far as the Bookseller was concerned.  He got up using his usual routine, went to the market and bought some books.

There had been some sort of altercation at the market but that was some way away from him and he decided to just cut his trip short.  He liked his quiet little life to be as undisturbed as possible.

There was a man waiting outside his shop when he arrived home.  It was an unusual enough occurrence for Ianto to give the man a second look, no one was ever that eager to buy a book.

He was about the same height as Ianto, handsome, dark haired, blue eyes that sparkled as they looked at him in a way that made the Bookseller turn away blushing.

“I’ll just be a minute,” Ianto told the stranger.

“No problem,” replied the stranger as he stepped to his door to unlock it.  _American accent, maybe that’s why he’s waiting instead of looking somewhere else_ , Ianto thought _._

The last thing he expected was to be grabbed from behind.  There was a chemical smell and rough material in the hand covering his mouth.

Suddenly all his limbs felt weak.  All Ianto felt was fear and confusion as the world went dark.


	2. Chapter Two

Ianto was aware of a car journey.  He remembered the sound of an engine, the feel of speed and braking.

He remembered hearing a voice, the American, talking animatedly alone.  His kidnapper on the phone to someone?

The whole thing was a haze.  He felt so tired and knew that he kept passing out.  He wondered what it was he had been given, wondered why he wasn’t afraid more.

When he was aware enough to realise he was handcuffed and strapped lying down on the back seat he knew that the drug was wearing off.  His fear was growing by the minute as he realised it was getting dark outside.

It was an hour after dusk when the car turned and ground to a halt.  The man he had seen outside his shop opened the door, unbuckled him and hauled him out.

His body ached and he felt stiff from being prone for so long.  His kidnapper practically carried him towards the isolated house.

It wasn’t his house Ianto realised.  He didn’t have a key, the Bookseller couldn’t tell how he got in but it wasn’t with a key.

He was dumped on the sofa while his assailant moved away.  He tried to make his muscles move but although the drug was wearing off its effects were still evident.

The man placed some shop sandwiches on a plate before him with a glass of water.

“Eat you have to keep your strength up,” he said with that American drawl Ianto recognised from earlier.

“Why?” Ianto asked.

“I don’t want anything to happen to you,” he answered.

“Why?”

“Just eat,” was the stern answer.

Ianto was thinking about refusing but his kidnapper sat down on the chair nearby.  He hadn’t taken his greatcoat off but for a moment, a gun was visible beneath it.

It was awkward eating with handcuffs on but what was worse was the other man’s gaze.  The stare that bore into him; that mixed desire and disappointment.

Ianto had no idea what he had done to draw this man’s attention.  Did he think Ianto possessed a unique antique book?  Was he a mad man who had simple chosen him at random?

When he had finished eating the man took his plate and glass away.  It was a relief because he was not sure he could keep the meal down otherwise.

The American returned for another round of staring.  He looked as if he wanted to say something but couldn’t find the words to say.

Ianto chose to remain silent.  He had no idea what to say and had no wish to aggravate the man with the gun.

After an hour he decided to give up.  He helped Ianto to his feet and after allowing the Bookseller a trip to the bathroom, led him to the master bedroom.

The door shut ominously behind them and Ianto suddenly had the feeling he knew exactly what this man wanted from him.

“My name’s Jack by the way,” he said coming closer.

Fear made him tremble as one of Jack’s hands trailed down his back.  The other lifted his chin and that intense stare confirmed his worst fears.

“I have wanted to do this for so long Ianto,” Jack said softly before bending in for a kiss.

I’m going to be raped and murdered, Ianto thought as his kidnapper’s tongue invaded his mouth and he closed his eyes tight.  He’s stalked me, kidnapped me and when he gets what he wants I’m going to die.  And no one will care.

Ianto shaking was uncontrollable as he felt strange hands release him from the cuffs long enough to slip his jumper over his head.  He couldn’t bear to watch as the man with the gun unbuttoned his jeans and freed his legs.

He was so terrified he didn’t hear the soft sigh, didn’t realise he was still wearing his underwear as he was led to the bed and made to lie down.

It was totally unexpected when he felt the bed dip beside him that he was scooped into Jack’s arms.  He was held firmly, tightly but that was all.

One hand roamed his body and Ianto had the strangest feeling that it was trying to reassure and calm him.  He was sure Jack was humming under his breath.

Ianto didn’t know how long he lay there, but the terror eventually drained into exhaustion and he slipped into a tense sleep.

 

 


	3. Chapter Three

Ianto Jones felt wonderfully relaxed as he basked in the warmth of another beside him.  It had been so long since he had been with another person, since he felt this warm.

Then he remembered what happened to him yesterday, remembered who this warm person was and what he had done.

“Good morning beautiful,” said a warm American voice as Ianto opened his eyes.  His body was shifted so that Jack could press a chaste kiss to the Bookseller’s lips.

“I guess I gave you quite a scare yesterday,” he said apologetically.

“You’re still frightening me now,” Ianto replied quietly.

“I’m sorry.  I don’t mean to I just had to make sure you were safe,” Jack said sadly.

“By kidnapping me?” Ianto asked incredulously.

“Yeah.”

“But I’m just a Bookseller in Newport.  What about that isn’t safe?”

“Everything and nothing,” Jack replied cryptically.

Ianto wanted to ask him what the hell that was supposed to mean but he was afraid to.  He didn’t want to anger the man that now had control over his life.

Instead he closed his eyes and tried to ignore the way his kidnapper was touching him.  It wasn’t a rough touch, it was a gentle caress and he hated it.

It had been over two years since anyone had touched him like that, looked at him with such desire, and it was his bloody kidnapper.

“Much as I’d love to be in bed with you all day,” the cheerful, awful American voice said, “we have to get moving.”

Jack seemed reluctant to let go as he pulled Ianto up and dragged him to the bathroom.

“I’m afraid I don’t have a change of clothes or toiletries and we probably have trust issues,” Jack said as he unlocked one of the cuffs before attaching it to a sink pipe.

“Freshen up as best you can.  I’ll get you something soon,” he added pressing up close behind Ianto.

Then he was gone closing the door behind him.

Ianto felt his whole body sag with relief to be alone.  He didn’t know what to do.

He really wished Lisa hadn’t made him give up his James Bond collection.  He was sure the films would have inspired some ideas, even if they were ridiculous ones.

He used the toilet and began to clean himself as best he could.  There wasn’t even any soap and he felt dirty and spoiled in a way that nothing to do with the state of his skin.

The kidnapper opened the door and released him from the pipe.  He led Ianto back into the bedroom and began to redress him in yesterday’s clothes.  Jumper first so that his wrists were immediately rebound together.

“Sorry about this.  I know you like to be pristine and clean,” Jack said casually as he re-buttoned Ianto’s jeans.

There was a spicy musk in the air.  It made Ianto feel light headed and nauseous.  He wondered where Jack had had the opportunity to freshen up, wondered if he was being drugged into being more pliant for his kidnapper.

“It’s a good job I find your natural scent intoxicating,” the American added and Ianto wanted the ground to open up and swallow him.

Behind closed eyes the scent of musk increased.  The feeling of warmth close to his chest felt like a fire, comforting at a particular distance but hot and painful at another.

The air suddenly felt a little colder, a little clearer.  Ianto opened his eyes to see that Jack had stepped back.

“Let’s get you some breakfast,” he said gently.

Jack led Ianto back downstairs, sat him, then secured him at the kitchen table.  He put some tinned fruit and a mug of tea down before leaving the Welshman alone to eat.

When he returned, flushed, twenty minutes later Ianto had no trouble knowing how Jack had freshened up.

The Welshman just wondered how long the American could keep himself satisfied before he got fed up with waiting.

 


	4. Chapter Four

Jack bundled Ianto into a different car to the one they had arrived in.  He broke into it and hotwired it.

Road signs told Ianto that they were heading towards Cheltenham.  They must have crossed the river yesterday and were heading north though England.

He wasn’t an expert, but surely kidnappers didn’t take their victims on a long drive.  Perhaps they just hadn’t reached their final destination last night.

Still Newport was an obscure place to go to kidnap anyone.  He couldn’t think of any customers living near Cheltenham he might have given the wrong impression to.  Besides, working online was so anonymous and he didn’t have his photo on his website.

He was also surprised when they pulled up on an industrial estate.  It was early and more or less deserted.

“He’s late,” Jack muttered.

Ianto wanted to ask who, wanted to ask why he was here but he was too frightened to speak.

“Are you okay Ianto?” Jack asked.

It was such a stupid question that he couldn’t help shooting the American a look of pure venom.  It was so brief that he didn’t see the surprise and hurt on Jack’s face.

He curled up as best he could wearing a seatbelt and handcuffs.  He stared into space not watching anything.

“There he is,” Jack said as a Harwood’s Haulage truck pulled up.

Jack got out before the truck had finished parking.  When Ianto tried the doors and his seatbelt they wouldn’t open as though he was child locked into both.

Ianto watched as the man handed a clip board over to Jack to sign.  He then walked around the back and opened the lorry.

A few minutes later a ramp was slid out and Jack climbed in.  Ianto watched the driver making sure the lorry was secure for unloading.

Ianto was thinking about how he could attract the man’s attention when he heard an engine start.  There was a Ford Mondeo being driven out of the back.  He realised Jack was a well organised kidnapper.

He returned to looking at the lorry driver.  Wondering if noise and handcuffs would be enough to get him to help.  Then he considered the possibility that Jack would pull out the gun he carried and hurt the Harwood’s man for trying to do so.

The unexpected click made Ianto look down to where his seat belt was released.  Swiftly the door was opened and the American had a hand over his mouth.

Ianto struggled but his kidnapper was stronger.  He was dumped in the passenger side of the new car and the doors locked trapping him inside once more.

Through the windscreen he saw the American drive the old car into the truck and the driver help him secure it inside.

Then Jack removed his greatcoat and folded it up neatly.  With reluctance he handed it over to the lorry driver with some instructions, a smile and some money.

Jack waited by the Mondeo until the haulage truck was on its way.  Then he returned to Ianto, belted him in and they drove off.

They travelled in silence, Ianto lost in his well of misery and Jack deep in thought.  The older man made frequent glances at the younger which were ignored.

Only hunger and thirst made Ianto accept the offered lunch and then dinner.  When they arrived at yet another empty house he had no idea where they were.

This time Jack went to the boot of the car first and pulled out two suitcases and got them inside before doing the same with Ianto.

Jack sat the Welshman on the bed and rifled though one of the cases until he found a toilet bag and a small case.  He opened the case first and removed a bracelet.  He put this around Ianto’s wrist then steered him to the bathroom with the toilet bag in hand.

Jack inspected the en suite bathroom then undid the cuffs and handed over the toilet bag.

“Here, take a shower, get freshened up,” Jack ordered and left.

Ianto inspected the bathroom.  There was no way though the small window and no lock on the door.  His new bracelet fit snugly and had no clasp that he could see, it was obviously some sort of tracker.

Resigned he inspected the toilet bag.  It contained a shaving kit with a safety raiser, shampoo and a mango shower gel, not what he would have chosen, as well as tooth brush, tooth paste and mouth wash.

He cleaned his teeth first, used the toilet and shaved before stripping off and jumping in the shower.  It felt good to be clean and he soaked deeply.

Ianto admitted secretly to himself that he liked the smell of the shower gel and the slight peach scent of the shampoo as well.

When he got out he looked for a towel and realised that his old clothes were gone.  Instead there was the towel with a clean pair of boxer shorts and a t-shirt.

Feeling disconcerted that he hadn’t heard Jack enter, he dressed quickly and opened the door.

As soon as he entered Jack was by his side.  There was concern in his eyes as he looked Ianto over and he insisted that the Welshman sit on the bed as he bandaged his wrists were the cuffs had rubbed his hands.

“Tell me about yourself Ianto?” he asked.  Ianto could smell and see that he too had taken the opportunity to shower.

“You stalked and kidnapped me, shouldn’t you already know?” Ianto demanded bitterly.

“A wise man once told me that observation of a person doesn’t compare with a conversation when getting to know someone,” the American replied.

“There isn’t much to tell really,” Ianto said hoping that he would drop it.

“When did you go to Newport?” he asked and Ianto sighed.

“I arrived about two years ago.  I split up with my girlfriend, Lisa and got fired in the same week.  I was heading home but I decided I couldn’t face my family so I went to Newport instead.

“I own a bookshop selling new and second hand books both of which I also sell on line.  I don’t go out much, don’t date really, I don’t do much of anything.

“To be perfectly frank I’m rather amazed that you noticed my existence,” Ianto replied looking down miserably.

“I’d notice you anywhere Ianto,” Jack replied causing the book seller to look up.

There were tears running down his face.  He had made his kidnapper pity him.

Ianto looked away, feeling uncomfortable.  Jack got up and led Ianto to the bed and pressed him to lie down upon it.

“I don’t think I’m the person you want,” the Bookseller told him unable to keep the fear out of his voice.

“You are.”

“Please let me go,” Ianto begged.

“Never,” the vehemence made him look at Jack, there was possessiveness in his tone and on his face, desperation.

My god I remind him of someone he’s lost.  He’s like one of those women who kidnap children because they cannot accept that their own child has gone.

“I’ll keep you safe Ianto,” Jack said rolling him over.

He began to caress the Welshman in the way Ianto hated.  Hated because he wished Jack was a lover of his choosing and the touches were meant for him and not a ghost.

Caresses became firmer.  Jack was massaging the tension out of the Bookseller.

That made him feel bitterness too.  No one had ever massaged him before.  Lisa had always preferred to receive rather than give.

Yet he found his body responding and unwillingly relax into sleep.  Ianto’s last conscious memory was of an arm sliding under his body and Jack spooning him secure against his chest.

 


	5. Chapter Five

The even thump of metallic boots were chasing him though the building.  It was an ordinary looking office but it smelt of smoke and blood and he was being chased.

They were getting closer and closer.  Heavy footsteps with the measured march of a ticking clock.  He had to get away and escape.

He dived through a door and he was suddenly in a kitchen.  The smell of blood lingered in here too and it felt filthy without a detailed examination of the surfaces.

Suddenly he was grabbed and being beaten.  Blows like none he had ever remembered experiencing before.

Incongruously as his assailant grabbed hold of a cleaver ready to cut into Ianto he was run over by a tractor.  Ianto fled from this too, out of the door into the sunlight, into a jungle.

He felt warm and uncomfortable in his suit amongst the tropical flowers.  He heard a voice calling his name and knew this was no attacker but his lover.

He shed his uncomfortable jacket and hung it on a tree branch for his lover to find.  Then he ran through the trees.

This wasn’t an insane run for his life anymore.  This was a game of chase.  He stripped his clothes off one item at a time leaving them at crossroads for his lover to find and decide which way he went.

He heard his name called as each article was found.  He was laughing and felt joyous with each step as he teased his chaser into catching him.

Then suddenly there was a glass door ahead of him.  Gwyneth, his unsuccessful date, stepped though dressed as a Victorian governess and she screamed.

Ianto Jones woke up with a start.

He was no longer spooned in Jack’s arms but facing him, pressed up close with an embarrassing erection.

“Good morning beautiful,” the American said his voice husky.

He leant down and began to kiss Ianto.  Jack pressed his body against the Bookseller so he could feel his kidnappers own erection.

When Ianto didn’t respond he pulled away a little disappointed.    Shock and fear had done the work of a cold shower in softening him.

Jack seemed to realise the effect his attentions were having on Ianto.  He groaned and enveloped the Bookseller’s mouth for another deep kiss.

As they parted the Welshman was suddenly aware that his arm was above his head.  He pulled and heard the chink of metal and let out a yelp of fear.

Yet as he noticed he was handcuffed to the bed, his kidnapper slid from it and dashed to the bathroom.  In his haste the door did not close properly behind him.

Ianto could hear the shower running but it was not loud enough to obscure the moans coming from within and the sound of his name being repeated cried.  Then suddenly it all went quiet and a few minutes later the water stopped.

Jack emerged covered only by drops of water and Ianto stared.  He had never seen a naked man like this before.

His kidnapper was all strong lines of muscle, shaping his body to perfection.  Only the remembrance of his situation as he looked on that awful, attractive face stopped Ianto’s body stirring.

“Like what you see?” Jack asked as though he knew the answer.  Ianto said nothing he just turned away in shame.

He felt the bed dip and was suddenly aware of Jack’s nakedness beside him.  I chaste kiss to his lips made Ianto open his eyes once more.

“I promise you’ll like me if you give me a chance,” Jack said giving him another kiss.  “Don’t worry I’ll wait for you to be ready.   I’d wait an eternity for you.  And you are worth the wait,” there was nothing Ianto could say as each sentence was emphasised with another kiss.

“We should probably get you ready for breakfast before you get me all roused again,” Jack said releasing Ianto from the handcuff.

Jack dragged him to the bathroom and gave him his clothes so that he could get dressed.  When he emerged his kidnapper was himself fully dressed.

They went down to breakfast together and there was a look of sadness in the American’s eyes as he had to cuff Ianto to the dining room table.

 


	6. Chapter Six

After five days Ianto Jones snapped.

They had developed a strange routine.  Ianto would go to sleep at night facing away from Jack and wake up chest to chest.

Jack always greeted him with “Good morning beautiful” and kissed him.  Sometimes it was a chaste kiss but mostly one that requested entrance to his mouth.

That was usually after his dreams turned from nightmares to running from his lover through the jungle.  He always woke from those with an erection and though Jack pressed against him with his own arousal, as soon as he realised Ianto was uncomfortable he went to the bathroom to finish himself alone.

He always left Ianto handcuffed to the bed while he screamed the Booksellers name beneath running water.  He never bothered covering himself with a towel afterwards as though wanting to display his assets for Ianto's approval.

Every day they went out driving.  Usually they went to a remote area and just sat while Jack talked.

Once in the five days Jack had packed up their things and they had driven to a new house.  They always broke in and it always seemed quiet and deserted when they did.

The day Ianto finally snapped was bright but breezy.  Jack drove them to a remote area of coastline.

Jack got a picnic hamper and a blanket from the boot before helping the handcuffed Welshman from the car.  They made their way carefully to a remote spot.  They went slowly as Ianto didn’t have the full use of his hands.

Jack set out the blanket and sat Ianto upon it.  It wasn’t really warm enough to sunbathe and the Bookseller felt grateful for that.

They just sat together in the beach as Jack began to talk.  He spoke about places he’d been to and people he’d known.

Every word made Ianto feel even more wretched.  Jack had had such a varied life and his was so dull and meaningless.

It didn’t really tally.  The person in those stories didn’t seem the kind of person to kidnap a boring Bookseller.  Yet Ianto remembered the feeling that Jack had lost someone and chosen him to replace them.

They sat side by side on the picnic blanket as they ate lunch.  Ianto mostly fed himself, though Jack occasionally brought food to his lips.  It was always something he liked and the pleading look in the older man’s eyes prevented him from refusing.

Jack talked all though lunch the way he always did.  His hands when not gesturing wildly or feeding Ianto were brushing against the Welshman, his arm, his thigh.

It wasn’t until today, when Jack whispered the end of a story in his ear and began nuzzling the skin beneath that Ianto realise.  All week he had been courted, he was being seduced into accepting Jack.

It was an intimate gesture too much.  A tingle across his nerves enough to shatter him.

It took his kidnapper a few minutes to realise that he was trembling in fear not pleasure.  That his breath was stolen by heavy sobs not excitement.

Ianto was crying and shaking and he couldn’t stop.  He was wretched and lonely and he couldn’t take anymore.

Jack bundled him up in his arms and it took Ianto a while to recognize that he wasn’t being caressed like a lover but cradled like a child.  Somehow that made everything so much worse.

It was nearly dusk and it had begun to rain a little when all the emotion finally drained from Ianto.  He stilled having nothing left.

“Will you tell me what’s wrong?” Jack asked his voice broken with concern as he added “please.”

There were no more tears to shed over Jack’s chest beneath his head; he had cried five days worth in one go.  No rage to shout over the irony that his kidnapper was the first person in years to take an interest in how he was doing.

“There’s no one,” Ianto said quietly.

“What?” Jack asked curious.

“You picked the perfect victim to kidnap.  I don’t think my disappearance will even have been noticed until today when Mrs Lewis comes to get the latest Mills and Boon.

“Even then it will take her a few days I expect to realise I’ve gone and am not just shut whenever she arrives.  When she does realise all she will do is curse the fact that she has to go into town for her book.

“I didn’t have much contact with my family after I went to London and I was ostracised by my friends after I split up with Lisa.  I haven’t been with anybody since.

“The only person too... is my bloody kidnapper and I don’t know... you,” Ianto wasn’t sure what he was trying to say anymore.  He felt so tired as well as emotionally drained that he wasn’t sure what feelings he was trying to express.

The Bookseller was too consumed by misery to notice that some of the drops falling in his hair had the warmth of tears.

“We could get to know each other,” Jack suggested slightly misunderstanding what Ianto had tried to say.  “We could talk and do things to get to understand one another that’s how relationships work.”

“And how do handcuffs and forced imprisonment figure into this blossoming romance you envision?” Ianto demanded discovering that anger was one emotion he was still capable of.

“If I had come to you and told you your life was in danger that I was going to protect you but that we had to leave, you wouldn’t have believed me.  You’d think I was mad and there was no time to convince you otherwise.

“You still think I am insane and I don’t blame you as the only one who seems to have hurt you, endangered your life is me.

“I will tone down my touching and kissing you, though you are wonderful to touch and kiss.  We can get to know each other, build up trust between us but I’m not going to stop holding you at night.

“I know, I know sleeping with someone is more intimate than sex because you are vulnerable, and it requires trust in a different way than sex.  It’s just that you bring out my protective side,” Jack said in a rush of explanation.

Ianto felt confused and miserable again.  It was as though Jack knew his mind and picked the worst offense not to relinquish.

He curled up small not consciously aware that he was pressing closer to the man he despised.  The Welshman didn’t remember getting back to the house, being undressed and put to bed with Jack.

In the morning when he woke Jack’s customary “Good morning beautiful” was accompanied by a kiss on the cheek.

Ianto felt pleased that Jack was good to his word and that his wishes had been obeyed.  Yet he felt disconcerted that he missed the press of those lips against his.

 


	7. Chapter Seven

“Good morning beautiful,” Jack said bending his lips to Ianto's cheek.

For the first time since Jack made his promise, the Welshman turned his head so that their lips met.  The initial chaste kiss was followed by a kiss requesting access which was granted immediately.

They kissed for five minutes, Jacks hands wandering over his body like the proper owner, his arousal pressing into Ianto’s before the Bookseller’s mind suddenly woke, suddenly remembered that he was a hostage and this was his kidnapper.

Ianto froze and a few moments later Jack did too.  The Welshman felt confused, uncertain as the other man looked him in the eyes.

There was understanding in his kidnapper’s eyes.  Jack gave him another chaste kiss to the lips then headed to the bathroom to shower and deal noisily with his hard on.

Ianto lay back feeling guilty.  He had initiated the kiss, his dream of being chased in the jungle left him aroused as much as Jack, but always he remembered his circumstances and stopped himself, leaving the other man wanting.

Jack and Ianto had been together for about five weeks now, four since that day on the beach where he had cried like a baby at the misery that was his life.  They had begun a routine that Ianto followed now almost without thinking about it.

As soon as he woke Jack spoke his greeting and kissed his cheek.  They got ready separately and ate breakfast together.

Every three days they would pack up their things and drive to a new house.  Ianto now helped Jack with the washing and packing almost eager to see a new place.

They travelled the country.  After they had gotten the car, Ianto realise later, they had actually turned around and driven southwest into Cornwall instead of continuing north.  Every three days they moved around the coastline staying in suburbs or deserted remote areas where they were not likely to be noticed.

For the days in between moving they took in the sights, visited beaches, rural places of historical interest and took walks in the country.  It almost felt like they were taking a touring holiday of Britain.

After the first week Jack no longer made Ianto were handcuffs in the house.  The Bookseller took on his share of domestic duties, especially when he proved to be a better cook than Jack.

When they went out now, Ianto almost eagerly stuck his hands out waiting for the cuffs so that he could see where they were.  Sometimes Jack cuffed them together so that they could walk hand in hand.

They were also talking as promised, getting to know each other.  Jack was a very charming man and Ianto couldn’t help blushing at every compliment, wishing occasionally for his touch to linger.

After dinner they would sit together companionably on the sofa and read or watch television.  Jack provided him with books, some he had read before but others were new, the older man always took an interest in what he liked in a way Lisa never had.

Ianto also went willingly to bed with Jack now.  He relaxed into the man against his back, his fear not returning a week after his kidnapper proved true to his words.

In the morning though, Ianto always woke facing Jack, those powerful arms cradling him.  Only when he had the dream about the lover in the jungle did the book seller wake aroused.

He was sure it was a little unfair on his kidnapper that he should have such dreams that awakened the other man’s hopes, only to have reality pour a bucket of cold water on them.  Yet Jack always understood and finished himself off without complaint in the bathroom.

After their talk though, Jack always grabbed his clothes and a towel before taking his shower.  He would return the image of dressed perfection.  Ianto was sure, despite what Jack said, that he himself didn’t look that good in the morning.

This morning though Jack hadn’t bothered with such courtesy.  Ianto deserved it, after all he was the one who had begun their kissing session.

The man looked as perfect in water drops as any other article of clothing.  Despite having stopped them this morning, Ianto was still a little aroused and the sight went straight to his cock.

Pretending not to care, he slipped for the bed and stood at the foot waiting to be given his clothes the way he always did.  The grin on Jack’s face told him that his continued arousal had not gone unnoticed.

Jack gave Ianto his clothes and leaned in for another kiss.  A wet thigh brushed his hot groin making him gasp in the kiss.

The older man then suddenly withdrew leaving Ianto feeling disappointed.  He almost wanted him to step closer, almost wanted Jack to stand still while he rubbed up against him, let himself inhale that wonderful spicy musk the man exuded.

Instead though he suddenly felt embarrassed and retreated hastily into the bathroom.  The air was heavy with Jack’s scent that seemed to compliment his strange choice in toiletries.

He stripped off and looked at the hard on that hadn’t left like its predecessors.  The irony was not lost as he stepped into the shower and used Jack’s method of getting rid of an erection.

As he closed his eyes beneath the water he was in his jungle again.  His fingers as they touched his cock stopped being his own and became those of the lover who chased him.

Those fingers were strong and held a power and a confidence that Ianto knew his own didn’t possess.  They moved along his shaft knowing what he would like, moving in ways his own previous attempts never had.

He bit his lips to stop the moans escaping.  While his mind was in his private dream, part of him was still aware that he was in a bathroom with Jack next door.

Ianto’s free hand moved of its own accord around his body.  Later he would feel surprise as he had never touched himself as he jerked off before.

His wandering hand also belonged to his jungle lover.  It touched Ianto in all the right places adding to his pleasure.

Those possessed fingers suddenly touched his entrance.

“Jack,” he gasped coming hard in his fist.

Ianto didn’t hear the click of the bathroom door.  It took him a few minutes to even register the name he had cried.

 _I’m falling for my kidnapper_ , Ianto thought with a slight uncertain laugh as he deeply inhaled the pervading spicy musk he has come to associate with Jack.

The Welshman calmed himself down and then took a proper shower.  He dressed in one of the smart suits that Jack had recently developed a liking for him wearing.

Jack was waiting for him in the kitchen cooking pancakes.  There was a sparkle in his eyes that hadn’t been there before.

Ianto realised that Jack knew he was winning.  The older man knew that he was falling for him.  The smile though wasn’t a victory grin, there was a nervous shyness to it that stirred the Welshman a little.

The Bookseller crossed the room not sure what this all meant.  He sat down quietly to eat as he always did, confused and uncertain.

Jack’s hand gave him just the right kind of lingering touch.  Not possessive or obsessive but gentle and reassuring.

Ianto was suddenly aware that for the past three weeks, since he stopped being afraid, he had stopped feeling alone.


	8. Chapter Eight

Ianto was looking forward to going out with Jack, to being out of the house alone with him.   He wanted to visit the beach or go for a long walk he didn’t mind which.

He was waiting for Jack by the door, hands out ready for the cuffs.  Ianto felt disappointed when Jack hesitated.

“Take off your jacket and tie and roll up your sleeves.  It’s hot today,” Jack said gently.

Ianto obeyed quickly and stuck his hand out again.  Jack kissed the inside of each wrist before encasing them in metal.  He had never done that before and it sent a thrill through the Bookseller.

To the Welshman’s surprise, the older man then took the jacket and placed it over his hands covering his cuffs.  He looked curiously at Jack who just smiled back.

Instead of heading towards the countryside as he expected they headed into town.  Ianto understood the placing of the jacket now.

He realised that today was going to be a test.  Jack was testing their relationship, to see if Ianto was ready to have the cuffs taken off or if he was going to betray him.

This was the opportunity that Ianto had waited five weeks for.  He would be out in public for once and he could cry out for help.

Someone, a police man maybe would come to his rescue.  Jack couldn’t shoot everybody.  There was a risk that he might get shot as he tried to escape, but he might become free.

“Thank you,” Ianto said politely as Jack opened the door for him.

They were in the car park of an art museum.  It was early enough that there were only a few people around.

Jack paid their entrance fee and Ianto didn’t object to the hand around his waist as he was guided along the exhibits.  Indeed when he wasn’t concentrating, the Welshman would lean into the man beside him.

For a kidnapper Jack knew a surprising amount about art.  He also knew quite a lot of scandalous things to say about the artists.

They lingered in the erotic art exhibition.  It was the intimate way Jack spoke to him, the accidently on purpose caresses that Ianto leaned into, more that the paintings that aroused the Welshman.

Ianto began to fantasize about having sex in the gallery.  The lover from the dream jungle, Jack, transported now into the midst of male and female sexual perfection on canvas making his flesh join them.

The arrival of another couple, man and a woman, stern and in dark suits halted such intimate thoughts before they could go beyond an image in his head.  Jack steered them away to see another exhibit.

Yet the couple seemed to be following them.  They weren’t giving the art more than a cursory look but their eyes watched Jack and Ianto eagerly.

When he realised Ianto had spotted them ,Jack grabbed his hands.  They made their way hastily through the exhibits trying to shake them.

Instead they spotted not one but two more couples in the same kind of suits as the first, both just as interested in them rather than the art.  The way to the car park entrance was now blocked by them, there was no way back to the car.

For the first time in three weeks Ianto was afraid.  The danger Jack had told him he was in was suddenly here and very real.

They hastily made their way to the other exit.  A fourth couple came out of nowhere right in front of them.

Ianto saw a glimpse of gun beneath the man’s jacket before Jack suddenly let him go and sprung forward.

He tackled both of them, kicks, punches and throws like something out of James Bond.  Jack managed to knock them both down before grabbing Ianto and hurtling through the doors.

They ran blindly into a busy shopping centre.  Ianto realised that Jack was trying to lose their pursuers in the crowd.

Ianto yelped as he heard gunfire behind them.  Shoppers all around them began to shriek and panic.

Jack tightened his grip on Ianto.  The Welshman could feel his arm bruising but he didn’t care, he didn’t wasn’t to lose the other man now.

“Harkness surrender him,” a voice cried out and Jack increased his pace.

Ianto was too busy concentrating on running to ponder leaning Jack’s surname.  He just wanted to know why he was so important; but more urgently he wanted to know how they would escape.

Neither knew where they were going as they left the shopping centre.  They twisted and turned through back streets, allies, and crowded streets; anywhere there were crowds or no way for a vehicle to follow.

They were both scanning the people around them, looking for the same suits.  Both reacted in tune each time they saw one, each time they heard gunfire and fled from it.

They ran from the town centre into the residential area.  They would hide every now and then in gardens to try and catch their breath.  Then they had to continue, the pursuit was relentless.

It seemed to Ianto that they ran for hours.  They kept going even when they couldn’t see those suits or any more cars.

Every time they rested Jack would consult the wrist strap he always wore before making them continue.  Ianto didn’t think he’s ever sprinted that much before.

“It’s all clear,” he said finally as they rested behind a wall in a suburban street.

Such relief washed through Ianto that he did the only thing that came to mind.  He pressed forward and kissed Jack Harkness.

 


	9. Chapter Nine

Jack responded to Ianto’s kiss with equal eagerness then suddenly pulled back.  Instinctively the Welshman knew that he was checking that this was what Ianto wanted.

Ianto was pumped full of adrenaline, a little lust from this morning in the shower, the art gallery and Jack’s scent was in his nostrils.  Jack had told him the truth that he was in danger and the Bookseller felt safe with him, wanted to be touched by him like before, he wanted to stop being alone.

The Welshman leaned in and grazed his lips over Jack’s wanting them to be accepted, wanted himself to be accepted.  He was and Ianto felt like his whole body was on fire.

When Jack withdrew the second time Ianto knew it wasn’t because he was rejected.  They were both aroused and they both wanted to release the other.

The older man consulted his wrist strap looking around.  He took Ianto’s hands and led him down a few streets until he found what he was looking for, an empty house.

They broke in the same as they always did but this time they didn’t bother to close the door behind them in the eagerness to get to the bedroom.  Jack hesitated again and Ianto regretted ever denying him what he wanted.

Ianto grabbed Jack’s shirt and pulled him towards him and kissed him.  He walked backwards until he hit the bed and pulling the older man to him.

Jack’s hand went to his pocket for the keys but Ianto stopped him.  He fell backwards on the bed and raised his hands above his head.  He wanted to let Jack know he had surrendered completely to him.

The American removed his jacket, gun belt and shoes rapidly as though afraid the young man would change his mind.  Then he pulled Ianto further along the bed as he leaned over him.

The older man made fast work of the buttons of Ianto’s shirt.  The Welshman helped him pull the shirt from him back and up his arms.  Jack wrapped the shirt around the headboard securing the Bookseller who just smiled encouragingly.

With a kiss Jack began to get his revenge for having to wait in the most pleasurable way possible.  Ianto was high on adrenaline and wanted release but instead his body was to be worshiped.

Jack began at Ianto’s neck, nuzzling in the tender spot that had been a touch too much before.  This time the tingle down his nerves was not enough and he moaned, giving the older man all the licence he desired to continue.

Jack worked his way up Ianto’s arms first.  Kissing, touching and marking him gently so that everyone would know.

Their eyes were in contact the whole time.  Ianto knew a test when it wasn’t touching his erection.  He growled his impatience and Jack beamed at him with his most charming smile.

Then the older man moved to his torso.  Jack had a knack for finding pleasure spots, every second he felt harder and more frustrated, every second he surrendered more of his ability to think.

He felt the hesitation and looked down.  Jack had his hand poised above Ianto’s zipper.  The Welshman arched his back so that the other man’s fingers touched the cloth.

Ianto couldn’t blame Jack’s caution really.  The number of times he had made him hard only to freeze and send him away to look after himself.

Not today though, not right now.  Ianto had had enough of being chased through the jungle.  Now he wanted what came with being caught.

He arched his back again to let Jack slip both trousers and boxers from his legs.  They got caught up in his shoes but the older man took care to untangle them.  He then began to give Ianto’s legs the same treatment as he gave Ianto’s arms.

Spread fully naked beneath Jack’s gaze, Ianto knew that he was the one being look at, not some ghost from the other man’s past, him.  He opened his legs to let the other man come between them.

As soon as Jack’s mouth touched Ianto’s cock all conscious thought ceased.  His mind was overloaded with pleasure that he was surprised that he didn’t come.

He couldn’t remember ever being touched this way.  He had never known he was capable of feeling like this.

Ianto wasn’t aware of Jack fumbling in his pockets or of the sound of the tube of lubricant being opened.  He wasn’t even aware of the sound of his own voice moaning, sighing and growling.

He was aware of slick fingers at his entrance, fingers whose movements mirrored his own this morning in the shower.  The Welshman was aware of them and pushed his body down onto them.

Ianto writhed with pure pleasure on the bed.  Jack’s mouth around him and Jack’s fingers increasing in number inside him.

He didn’t realise he was thrusting up and pushing down.  He couldn’t hear the other man’s humming amid his increasingly loud cries.

He screamed Jack’s name as he came, not knowing which touch sent him over the edge.  His whole body felt like it was vibrating and the loss of Jack’s presence made him cry out in loneliness.

Then Jack was above him.  He wanted to pull the other man close but his restrained hands prevented him.

Jack kissed him and he could taste himself, it was bizarre and different and so right.  He didn’t care about the way his legs were being shifted or the sound of another zip.

When Jack pulled back, Ianto felt something new caressing his hole.  He pushed down inviting the American in, crying in ecstasy as his prostate was touched once more.

Jack thrust in hard but all Ianto felt was bliss.  The older man’s lips possessed his with kisses between the cries of every movement.

“Ianto,” Jack called loudly and he felt something wet and warm gushing inside him.

The Welshman felt the jerks of aftershocks cease before Jack pulled out.  The older man was still fully clothed and fumbled for his pocket to get the keys.

Jack gently removed the handcuffs and Ianto’s shirt.  He looked at the Bookseller in concern, then surprise as he was kissed.

Gentle thumbs brushed at Ianto’s eyes and he was startled to feel wetness there.  He kissed Jack again to let him know they were tears of pleasure and the older man’s arm enveloped him.

Ianto wrapped his arms around Jack and was pulled closer.  The older man stroked his back, kissed him a few times before exhaustion from the run made the Bookseller drift into a doze.

 

The sound of car doors slamming followed by raised voices startled him awake.  He looked into Jack’s eyes to see the same sight panic.

They scrambled off the bed together.  It was alright for Jack he was practically fully dressed.  He just needed to pull up his trousers and put his shoes, gun belt and jacket on, Ianto was naked.

The Welshman grabbed his trousers and pulled them on hurriedly as he watched Jack gather up his boxers, shirt and jacket.  There was no time for socks either as he pulled his shoes on.

Jack opened the window and dropped out into the garden below.  Ianto stuffed his socks in his pocket and went over to look for the older man.

Wearing a reassuring smile Jack was positioned below the window ready to catch him.  Not feeling very sure, but fearing that he had no choice, Ianto climbed out feet first.

Somehow in the fall he turned around.  He landed on top of Jack looking down at him.  The American pulled him in for a quick kiss before they scrambled up.

They ran out of the garden with the sound of angry voices behind them.  The both looked back and realised that it wasn’t the people in strange suites but the owners of the house.

They kept on running hand in hand until the angry calling had long since died away.


	10. Chapter Ten

They stopped to allow Ianto to put on the rest of his clothes and for Jack to steal a car.  Once inside the vehicle they began to drive at a sedate, unnoticeable pace until they reached the motorway.

Relief this time made the Welshman feel tired.  With the sound of speeding cars around him Ianto fell asleep.

The Welshman was awakened by the feel of lips against his.  He opened his eyes to see Jack’s face and pulled him into a kiss.

It was a sudden sound of people that made the Bookseller pull away from the embrace.  They were in the car park of a pub.

Jack smiled at him and opened the car door.  Ianto followed feeling suddenly excited as well as very hungry.  After spending so much time with just Jack he was now going to be surrounded by people.

As they entered Jack indicated were the bathroom was and headed towards the bar.  Ianto went because he wanted to clean up and it felt wonderful to be trusted alone.

There were no nagging doubts, no voice in his head telling him he was crazy, that the man in the bar had kidnapped him and that the last thing he should do was put out.  It didn’t matter because right then Ianto wouldn’t have listened to that voice anyway.

All the Bookseller could focus on was the fact that he hadn’t felt this good in years.  It wasn’t just the pure physical pleasure; it was having so much attention lavished upon him.

He stilled his hands upon the sink for fear that touching himself, any part of himself would arouse him with memory.  Ianto looked at his face; only the huge smile and the easily concealed love bites gave away the fact that he had had the best sex of his life.

After being alone for so long, Ianto couldn’t help wondering what in his ordinary seeming face attracted Jack.  What made those eyes blaze at him as though he should be naked and pleasured morning, noon and night?

A sudden fear burned in him.  What if, now that I am his he doesn’t want me anymore?  What if his eyes don’t look at me like that because I wasn’t up to his expectations?  What if he leaves me alone again?

Ianto hurriedly finished freshening up and headed to the bar.  Jack was on the pay phone.  As soon as he spotted the Welshman his face broke into a huge grin and he hung up.

He grabbed drinks from the bar and made his way to a secluded table.  It afforded them both a good view of the pub while being out of the way and unnoticeable.

There was nervousness in Jack’s smile as Ianto joined him.  It was as though this wonderful giver of joy was afraid that he had changed his mind.

Ianto gave him a reassuring smile and Jack’s own relaxed.  The American was drinking water he noticed while getting him a pint.

He guessed that it was a local ale but it tasted good.  He hadn’t had alcohol in a long time so sipped cautiously, afraid that it would go to his head.

Jack didn’t say anything and he was half afraid to speak himself.   He shied under the scrutiny and began to look around them.

It had been a long time since he’s been in a pub too.  He looked at the other drinkers half curious, half a little scared, he really wasn’t used to people.

His staring was interrupted by a woman setting down food before them.  Ianto looked from his vegetable pasta dish to Jack in surprise; it was exactly what he felt like eating.

They ate and drank in silence, both shooting occasional glances at the other.  After they finished, Ianto could feel Jack’s leg rubbing suggestively against his and they both made the decision that it was time to leave.

They drove silently into the night until Jack found the house he was looking for.  Some time on their first journey Jack must have stopped for toiletries as he took a bag out of the back of the car before breaking in with Ianto at his side.

Ianto went into the bathroom first as had become their routine.  Tonight though he didn’t bother with drying himself off and dressing in his boxers and a t-shirt.

He stepped out a little nervous and completely naked.  Ianto wanted to make sure that Jack could see and like all of his not very toned body.

Jack looked up at him and Ianto didn’t think he’d ever seen anyone get undressed that fast.  He had enough time to see that the American was starting to harden before he was suddenly lifted in a fireman’s carry and placed on the bed.

The older man looked down at him unsure and Ianto moved his legs apart.  Jack went back to his pants to grab some lube then placed himself between the Welshman’s inviting limbs.

Jack immediately began by placing his lips around Ianto’s cock.  The same as earlier he was sucked and opened slowly.  When Ianto came the older man pressed inside and thrust the Welshman over pleasure’s edge until he came too.

Snuggled in the American’s arm afterwards Ianto suddenly wanted to return the favour.  The Bookseller wanted Jack to know just how wonderful he made him feel.

The huge powerful cock looked a little intimidating.  Ianto felt safe though to begin by lavishing the same attention on Jack’s torso as the older man had on his.

Ianto could tell from the noises Jack was making that he was doing this right.  He stopped thinking about it and focused on getting the American to make that sound again.

He was aware that Jack’s cock looked even more intimidating when it was hard.  Yet he was losing himself in giving back what he had been given.

Without knowing why he positioned himself above Jack’s throbbing member and eased his way down.  The older man’s cry of surprise only served as encouragement to Ianto.

He moved up and down slowly, feeling his way, teasing Jack as pay back for worshiping him earlier when all he wanted was to come.  Not of course that he didn’t prefer being worshiped first.

After several cautious movements though Jack had enough of lying back and being teased.  He sat up changing the angle and making Ianto call out at the increased pleasure.

They increased the pace together, moved in harmony with their arms wrapped around each other, touching and kissing.  The feel of Jack’s strong fingers around his cock was suddenly so perfect.

After years of loneliness, a month of misery and a little fear, Ianto was now in haven.  He wanted to die now knowing pure happiness as he came.

Someone so vibrant with life was not destined for erotic death nor was the night over for their coupling.  It was as if they were both trying to cram a month’s worth of sex into a single night.

Yet while the spirit may be up for more than willing, the body often has limits.  Ianto came and slipped finally into unconsciousness after their fourth time.

Jack cleaned them both up and pulled Ianto’s body too him.  The Welshman wrapped his limbs around the American who kissed his lips one final time before closing his own eyes.

 

 


	11. Chapter Eleven

The light of dawn is often the harshest light of all.  New days often bring cleansing but sometimes they bring clarity.

It was later in the morning than usual when Ianto woke but the look in his eyes stopped Jacks customary greeting and kiss.  While the Bookseller made no move to leave their embrace there was a distinct anger in his eyes.

“Ah the morning after look.  Regret last night?  I do hope it’s the ‘my god I’ve just slept with my kidnapper’ regret excuse and not ‘being with another man is wrong’, after all this time that would just be hypocritical,” Jack said making no attempt to move either.

“But that’s exactly what is wrong Jack,” Ianto said his voice matching the anger in his eyes.  “I have never been with a man before, so how the hell do I know how to make love to you?”

Ianto scrambled away from Jack’s embrace and pulled the covers around himself.  The American moved to sit on his knees opposite him, covering himself only when he realised the Welshman was shrinking away.

Cautiously the older man reached out and stroked Ianto’s cheek.  The Welshman allowed it to draw his face to the man who yesterday had made him so happy.

“That’s what we were doing wasn’t it?” Ianto asked looking for confirmation rather than making a demand.  “Okay the first time was a little adrenaline fuelled sex on my part, but you were making love to me and for the rest we made love to each other.”  Jack didn’t move.

“I knew how to touch you,” Ianto said reaching a hand out to towards the other man but not making contact, “and how to be touched by you.

“When you were inside me it didn’t feel like an invasion or a violation, I opened up and welcomed you.  It’s as though that impressive example of manhood belonged up my arse.

“When I wanted to show you how wonderful you made me feel, I rode you.  Lisa never did that to me how did I know to do that with you?

“For dinner yesterday you knew exactly what it was I wanted to eat.  Something energy giving that wasn’t too filling in case we had more sex, and _you_ knew that.

“I... we know each other don’t we?  The person you’ve lost somehow that’s me,” Ianto said his voice rising and falling in a mix of anger and confusion.

“You always look so cute when you’re flustered,” Jack said and Ianto stared at him.

“Yes we know each other,” the American said gently.  “What you remember of the last four years of your life is mostly a lie.  You work for an organisation called Torchwood; you’d only been a Bookseller for three months when I took you.”

“I’ve never heard of Torchwood and I don’t remember you.  Why not?  Was I so bad that I just wanted to forget everything?”

“No, no you are the most wonderful human being I have ever known.  You’re life has had more than its share of tragedy, but no you were never bad,’ Jack said his hand itching to give him a reassuring touch.

“You joined the institute in London, that’s where you met Lisa.  I didn’t pry too deeply into your relationship with her, I was a little afraid of how I didn’t match up to her, but I don’t think you are remembering her exactly how she was.

“You loved Lisa very much.  You were going to ask her to marry you but you didn’t get the chance.

“There was an incident.  You weren’t dumped and fired, there was an attack and Lisa and most of the people you worked with were killed,” Jack said gently.

Ianto wanted to reject his words but all he felt was a deep hollowness.  It didn’t feel like fresh grief though, there was a numbness to the pain as though time had been allowed it to blunt.

Jack was sitting beside him now, holding Ianto in his arms as he wept for people he barely remembered.  The Welshman looked into the American’s eyes and begged him silently to continue.

“You came to Cardiff wanting a job with me.  You’re motives weren’t exactly pure and they led you to betray me but they were understandable and forgivable.

“You mourned and you turned to me for comfort.  We started a relationship and then I had to leave suddenly without telling you.

“I came back and you became the one to forgive me and give me comfort.  We’ve been together ever since.  We’ve lost good friends and looked after each other.

“Ianto Jones five months ago you were the most important person in my life.  I... I loved you, I’m still in love with you.  I love and miss the person you were every day, and I’m more than a little enamoured of the person you are now,” Jack confessed quietly.

“If I meant so much to you when why do I think I’ve been a Bookseller from Newport for the last two years.  Why don’t I remember you?  Why did I want to forget you?  Why did you give me up?” Ianto asked pulling away from the embrace.

“I didn’t, you didn’t,” Jack said staring honestly into Ianto’s eyes, “you were taken from me.”

 


	12. Chapter Twelve

Jack stood on his favourite roof looking across Cardiff.  Everything was clear in the dawn light, the day was set to be perfect.

Making love to Ianto that morning hadn’t done anything to quell the excited giddiness he felt.  He had spent a whole month planning this.

Today was Jack and Ianto’s two year anniversary and they were going to spend all night celebrating.  Not that Ianto knew it was their anniversary yet.

A month ago flowers, chocolates and a CD turned up at the Tourist information office for Gwen.  When the CD was played it was just a recording of Rhys Williams going on about whatever to the world and his wife.

Far from being annoyed Gwen laughed and clapped her hands in delight.

“It’s the thirteenth anniversary of the day we first kissed.  I can’t believe he remembered.

“We were in this queue and he got angry and went off on one.  He had such passion and fire in him I just had to kiss him.  My Rhys the Rant,” she explained affectionately.

After the terrible time they had had her husband’s timing was perfect.  Gwen phoned him and wore a beaming smile for the rest of the day.

Ianto on the other hand went very quiet for the rest of the day.  There would be no such celebrations for him and Jack.

The day they met, their first kiss, the first time they had sex, and his return from being with the Doctor, all had painful associations.  To Jack’s shame he wasn’t sure which of their aborted dates could be counted as their first, let alone which was the most worthy of celebration.

Jack realised as he watched Ianto look sadly at Gwen that his lover had given up on romance.

There were tiny gestures on the Welshman’s part to let Jack know that Ianto was romantic, but they were subtle.  They were easily ignorable or open to misinterpretation so that they wouldn’t make the Immortal feel uncomfortable.

With this realisation, Jack had the overwhelming urge to be romantic with his boyfriend.  He wanted an anniversary they could celebrate so that he could see Ianto glow the way Gwen was.

It took the rest of the day but he found the perfect day.  Today two years ago was the first time Ianto had made him Welsh Cakes.

He knew it probably said something about him.  Especially as he thought Ianto’s Welsh Cakes deserved their own day of national celebration but there was a second significance to the day.

It was during those first few months when Suzie was still alive and had made the suggestion that Jack had employed Ianto as a bed warmer.  The Welshman’s response had been to become as cold and professional as possible.  It was the beginning of the time where he had begun to fade into the background.

The previous night had seen the end of a tough case and Jack had sent everyone home, exhausted, and told them not to come in the next day.  Everyone, of course, except forgotten Ianto who was tidying up elsewhere.

Jack had come into the central Hub the next day to the smell of coffee and cooking Welsh cakes.  His nose led him to the board room where Ianto had a portable cooker and a griddle pan heating a national delicacy.

Ianto explained that he had thought the team might want cheering up.  Jack then had to explain that he’d given the others the day off but wouldn’t object to having Welsh Cakes.

It was a prime opportunity for seduction and with a sprinkling of sugar Ianto took it.  Jack was smitten by sultanas and mixed spice and would have given the Welshman anything he wanted right there.

It was the only time before the Cyberwoman incident where they really talked.  It was as though Ianto had given himself a break from caring for her to bond with the team and Jack was the only one available.

After Jack’s return he knew he was forgiven when he gave the team the day off and he found Ianto in the new board room with coffee, a portable cooker, a griddle pan and a batch of Welsh cakes ready to cook.

Jack was determined that this day was worthy of celebration for both of them.  He had planned everything, restaurant, hotel room, new suit etc for Ianto to wear the next day, gifts and UNIT to cover for them.

He had planned for everything, except the twenty armed men waiting for him when he reached the bottom of the building.

They knocked him out and he woke up naked in a prison cell.  He banged on the door and demanded to be released, to be told what was going on.

He was given clothes and was told that he was there for his tribunal.  He was marched in front of five people, two high ranking UNIT officers, two politicians and an army general; all of whom had a grudge against him.

They were demanding explanations for his conduct over recent events and he told them they had no authority over him and that they should release him at one.  They knew they had no authority but he had to answer for himself anyway.

For two weeks he was questioned and he refused to answer.  He only spoke insolence and demanded to know what had happened to his team.

Then the questioning turned towards his relationship with Ianto.  They had no access to Torchwood files and had focused on the fact that a member of London’s tainted tower was now one of his most trusted team members.

His protests and arguments were not listened to.  It hadn’t helped his case that three of the judges held their grudges because he had jilted them.

After three weeks as their prisoner he was informed of their decision.

Because of his services to humanity, his expertise and some high placed friends he would continue to be in charge of Torchwood Three.  Ianto Jones however would not be returning, his memory of his time at Torchwood would be erased and they would relocate him with suitable employment.

Jack went mad.  They locked him up for another week while they completed their deeds against the man he loved.

When he returned to the Hub he found an angry and concerned Gwen and Martha with a UNIT team that Colonel Mace had loaned Torchwood while Jack disappeared.  He explained what had happened, why Ianto hadn’t come back with him.

The UNIT Captain didn’t take any time to think, she simply said, “I’ll talk to the Colonel but I think you can leave Cardiff in our hands, find you man.”

Jack did exactly that.  It took a little time but he found Ianto in Newport living his life as a Bookseller.  He had sent Gwen as a date to check he was okay but she was called away on a Torchwood emergency.

Immediately after that Jack received a phone call from one of his politician judges warning him to stay away and leave Jones alone.  The Captain had been at his subtlest in his investigation, he’d even made sure that his judges had moved on to other things.

The only way they could have known was if Ianto was being watched by someone else and they had informed the politician.

That was when he realised that the whole Tribunal had been a charade.  This wasn’t about him at all.  It was all about Ianto.

 

 


	13. Chapter Thirteen

“Me, what’s so special about me?” Ianto asked.

“Everything,” Jack replied.  The glare the Welshman shot him made the American grin “I know I’m biased.” He added then kissed Ianto. 

The young man responded to the kiss, curling around the older man’s body.  Yet when they broke apart the American sighed, knowing he still had to answer the question.

“Your work for Torchwood was as a researcher and Archivist both for me and in London.  You had access to highly dangerous and secret information.”

“You said that I work for you but you don’t know what they are after?” Ianto asked.

“We don’t keep personal secrets from each other but there are things we both know that are dangerous, especially if anyone else knew.  If our work touches such a secret and lives are at stake we share, otherwise we keep silent,” Jack explained.

“So you think I know a secret you don’t, but someone knows I have it and wants it,” he asked slowly as though running the idea through his mind.

“Yes.”

“But that doesn’t make sense.  If they want a secret that I know why make me forget everything?”

“You’re right it wouldn’t make sense if you were retconed,” Jack agreed.

“Recton?” Ianto interrupted.

“Retcon is an amnesia drug used by Torchwood.  It suppresses memory, hours, days, years even.”

“And I haven’t been given it,” the Welshman said checking.

“No.  Even without the blood sample I had analysed when I took you, I knew.  The biggest clue is the fact that you met Lisa at Torchwood, if you had been given retcon you wouldn’t remember her at all,” Jack told him gently.

“What if my memories of her were too strong and overcame your retcon?” Ianto asked and regretted it immediately.

There was such hurt in Jack’s eyes.  Ianto was distraught remembering what the older man had said earlier about being afraid of measuring up to Lisa.

Yet the Welshman hadn’t meant that his love for her being too strong to forget.  When he thought of her all he felt was pain and grief.

He looked pleadingly into Jack’s eyes hoping he would understand.  Relief flooded though Ianto as the American’s arms and eyes held him reassuringly to say that he did.

 _How awful it must feel to be a forgotten lover_ , Ianto thought his fingers stroking Jack’s back unconsciously.

“Although it is possible to overcome the effects of retcon it’s an all or nothing kind of deal.  Besides even before last night there were clues that you hadn’t exactly forgotten everything,” Jack told him.

Ianto stopped himself from asking what clues.  The look in Jack’s eyes told him that he needed to realise for himself he couldn’t just take Jack’s word.

The Welshman thought over the events of the last month.  They had spent some time talking and going out to the beach or walks in the countryside.  There was his jungle dream but Jack only found out about that this morning.

There was Jack’s suit fetish and the fact that Ianto found the formal wear strangely comfortable.  Jack also seemed to know what food he liked but so would a stalker then there was...

“The books,” Ianto said out loud.  “You always asked me about my choice of reading, I thought it was you trying to find a safe topic of conversation with a Bookseller but they were all things I’ve read in the last few years.”

Jack’s face flashed a smile, this was the right answer but there was an expectant look, there was something more.

“The Hobbit,” Ianto exclaimed and Jack beamed.  “You took me to bed the other night and asked me to read it to you.  I started at chapter eight without you asking.  It was a brand new book, no bookmark I should have started from the beginning.”

“You had read to me up to chapter eight,” Jack answered then added to the confused look on the young man’s face, “Sometimes I need a break from everything.  I need care and a touch of innocence.  When I do, you read me The Hobbit so that I can listen to your voice, you do great voices.”

“I’m glad that I please you, but I still don’t see the point of making me forget,” Ianto said quickly to cover up the sudden hurt he felt at Jack’s affection for a person he no longer was.

“My Ianto wasn’t always that good at looking after himself, but when it comes to protecting others he fights tooth and nail like a jungle cat.

“Whatever secret it is they want he wouldn’t have given it up.  He would choose death first.  You on the other hand have no reason to feel that way.

“The only reason to make you forget, to make you believe you are a Bookseller from Newport is that so they can bring only certain memories back.  They can make you remember Torchwood secrets and hurt _you_ until you give them up,” Jack said gravely.

“If they made me forget who I was so I would surrender my secrets, why then dump me in Newport?  Why not extract them while they had me?  Why did you wait so long to get me?” Ianto asked fear creeping into his voice.

“I needed time to find out what was going on.  I needed to find out who was behind this, what they used to make you forget and I needed to make plans to get you out of there and keep you safe.

“Their reasons of dumping you were twofold.  Firstly you needed to be forgotten even if it was very wishful thinking on their part that I could be capable of that.

“While my tribunal was a sham, all my judges were influential people.  When the people behind all this couldn’t extract the information while you were in their custody, the judges they used needed to believe you were an incidental issue that had been dealt with.

“Secondly they needed to reinforce your new personality.  It is one thing to make you forget everything and tell you that you are a lonely Bookseller from Newport but it would take time and experience to make you actually believe that,” Jack said gently.

Ianto cast his mind back four months.  He remembered feeling everything was out of kilter.  That he seemed to be new to all the Booksellers and customers he had, like he was easily forgettable.

“So what is your plan?” Ianto asked and Jack suddenly looked ill at ease.  “You said you were making a plan.”

“There is someone who might be able to help us but they’re a bit strange.  I don’t know how far to trust him, especially with you.

“I needed you to trust me before we could go to him.  I thought well, you’re my boyfriend, I know you, it should have been easy.

“For someone so hot you’ve always had this streak of quiet shyness.  You vibrate when you have people to take care of and they made you lonely.

“You know we never go on holiday.  Both workaholics in a way and now well there’s only us and Gwen to look after things, we don’t always cope well but we’re doing our best but it means more work.

“I made you so unhappy when I took you and I had been getting ready to give you a big romantic gesture before all this happened.  So I decided to give you a holiday,” Jack said looking away guiltily.

_He’s hoping to get his Ianto back and that he will still remember me.  I must have been understanding if he thinks that I won’t be jealous that a fake me got the romance the real me didn’t.  I’m a fake me?_

Ianto looked over the man lying beside him with his arms around him protectively.  _He isn’t thinking this through properly.  I’m enough like his Ianto that he’s been confusing us at times, he doesn’t think of me as a completely different person._

“So what now?” Ianto asked trying to cover up a new wave of hurt.

“Well we could always see what else you remember,” Jack suggested with a waggle of his eyebrows.

“You do realise how mechanical your suggestion sounds.  Sort of insert cock J up arse I and see if they match,” Ianto informed him with a touch of snark to cover up the fact that he wasn’t sure he was ready for a third round after what he’d just learnt, what he felt.

“Actually I was thinking of trying that the other way around,” Jack said happily.

“What?” Ianto said in surprise.

“I can be a bottom,” Jack said defensively.  “In fact, when you’re adrenaline is up and you’re in your wild cat mood, you own my ass like no one ever has and sometimes leave me begging for more.

“You can be quite a good dom too when you want to be in control, when I need you to be in control.  This pure submissiveness, it’s cute, but it really isn’t you.”

Ianto lay there feeling stunned.  He couldn’t imagine ever being that way.  Lisa had always been in charge before, yet that thought suddenly felt tainted and wrong.

Jack gently brushed his cheek.  “Let’s get dressed and go get our new car and things.  We’ll make our way to the man I think can help us,” he said understanding.

Ianto kissed him to say thank you then went to get his shower still deep in thought.  It was only once they were eating breakfast that he realised that he’s walked naked to the shower and gotten dressed in front of Jack without caring for his modesty once.


	14. Chapter Fourteen

Jack and Ianto drove a newly stolen car to another industrial estate.  The Welshman suddenly realise that it was the norm for the two of them to steal cars and break into houses to sleep.  He wondered again what sort of person he had been if it didn’t bother him now.

Ianto wasn’t surprised to see another Harwood’s Haulage lorry pull up yet he looked over at Jack curious.

“Gwen’s husband is the manager of Harwood’s.  It’s too dangerous for them to come but we can use his fleet to get us what we need,” Jack answered the unspoken question.

Jack got out of their stolen car and indicated for Ianto to do the same.  The Welshman waited, standing back a little, as the American spoke with the driver of the truck.

Like before, there was a new car inside for them.  As soon as Jack parked it, Ianto got inside while the older man drove the stolen car into the lorry.

As Jack disappeared from view, Ianto turned his attention to the driver.  He was surprised to find the man staring at him.

He was looking at the Welshman appraisingly, appreciatively and when he realised Ianto had noticed he smiled wide and waved.   The young man suddenly blushed and turned away from the unexpected attention.

Ianto felt relieved when Jack got into the car and they drove away.  He was embarrassed about the way he had reacted.

They drove in silence.  Hundreds of questions roamed through Ianto’s head.  _What sort of secret could I possess?  What does Torchwood do?  Who is this man you are taking us to see?_   All questions springing from their conversation that morning.

Yet when they were sat in a pub for lunch Ianto asked, “What were we like?”

“Huh?”

“What were we like as a couple?  Why did we get together?  What was our first kiss like?  Our first date?  Our first time?   What attracted us to each other?” he asked in a rush.  When Jack hesitated Ianto let his eyes fall and looked away as though the matter was unimportant.

“You know you have a strange advantage over yourself,” Jack said sadly.  “You know I’m yours completely I don’t think the man you were did.”

“But you’re so obsessed with him,” Ianto replied confused.

“I am but I wasn’t always.  Being a one-man guy is kinda new for me.  When we first met I could make hello into an invitation to bed.

“You knew that when you came to me for a job.  You tried to appeal to me sexually but I was mourning someone I thought I’d lost at the same time you lost Lisa.  I was just not interested.”

“Because it was London’s fault,” Ianto said and Jack looked at him in surprise.

“You said that the tribunal used the fact that I worked in London as an excuse to get rid of me.  They thought I was corrupting you,” Ianto explained.

“If anything I’m the corrupting influence in our relationship.  You’re my man Friday; you keep me sane and centred, keep me on the straight and narrow.”

“You are calm when I need calm and yet can be so passionate you burn me.  You have the wisdom of one who’s seen and knows too much and you have the playfulness of youth,” Jack said warmly.

“Your first two attempts to impress me failed and I was pretty pissed when you appeared in a suit for attempt number three.  Only you had a lure that was Torchwood business.

“We both got our adrenaline pumping and you got a chance to show me your ingenuity, bravery and how well you look in a suit.  I fell from a height, literally and figuratively.  You caught me, we rolled to avoid being hit and as I lay beneath you and looked into your eyes I wanted you to kiss me.

“Instead you got up and walked away, so I gave you the job,” Jack finished smiling.

“So I…” Ianto said slightly horrified to think that he could have sold himself.

“Oh no you didn’t,” Jack said hastily.  “I confess I was probably thinking more with my cock then I should have in giving you a job but I knew you lost Lisa.

“I realised that you weren’t ready to give me what you hinted you would and didn’t press you to.  I was hoping to give you time to heal and then be there when you changed your mind.

“Instead I was surprised by finding I had a brilliant and dedicated employee.  Then there was the matter of that ulterior motive I mentioned earlier and your betrayal; all forgiven now, especially as I have done things myself that I needed you to forgive me for.

“It took you a long time to get over Lisa.  I think you turned to me afterwards because I was willing and available.  You didn’t want another relationship just something a bit more than friendship.

“Then I had to go away.  It was something I had been waiting a long time for, something I thought I wanted.

“It turned out I was wrong.  While I waited, I changed and it took going away to realise that it wasn’t what I wanted at all so I came back.

“One of the things I knew I wanted was you.  Only I’d gone and broken your heart.  So I asked you out of a date, we’d never done that before.  We still don’t have a great track record when it comes to dates, business always seems to interrupt.”

“I was very lucky wasn’t I,” the Welshman stated.

“No Ianto Jones I’m the lucky one,” Jack stated.

Ianto knew Jack was wrong but didn’t correct him.  Instead he asked “Tell me about my other friends.”

In answer, Jack rose and led him outside.  They went for a walk to a lonely spot before he began to tell him about the people he had worked with.

Shining Gwen, brilliant Toshiko and irrepressible Owen, they all sounded so wonderful even though Ianto knew Jack was editing bits out.  He realised the reason for their isolation as he learnt he had lost two of them.

It was the same with Lisa, he could feel deep grief whose pain was numbed by time passing.  Ianto knew he only had Jack’s story to know them but the emotions he felt were so deep as if their friendship was real, so he wept.

 

 


	15. Chapter Fifteen

Ianto was silent throughout the journey from the pub to wherever it was they would be staying tonight.  He was lost in thoughts about the people he had known that he had now forgotten.

They all sounded like such wonderful people and Jack obviously loved all of them.  Compared to them Ianto himself was nothing special.

Unlike the previous night when he was swift and full of the euphoria of sex, tonight Ianto lingered in the bathroom.  What made him hesitate tonight was fear.

He didn’t know what Jack expected of him.  Would he be disappointed if Ianto came out in a t-shirt and boxers?  Would he lose interest and leave if Ianto wasn’t ready to have sex with him again.

It was all so much to take in.  The fact that he wasn’t real, that he was living a life fabricated for him.  That he was supposed to have friends and a lover instead of the aching loneliness that was all he remembered.

Dangerous people and dangerous secrets held no power over him compared to that.  He had thought he was at ease with his lonely boring existence but now the thought of returning to it terrified him.

He held onto the sink and took a few calming breaths trying to build his courage.  He didn’t care about the consequences he couldn’t go back to that.

Ianto stepped naked from the bathroom and walked swiftly across the floor to Jack.  He didn’t notice the look of surprise on the American’s face he just pressed in close and kissed him.

The arms around him felt comforting and reassuring as he attacked Jack’s buttons.  A hand brushed his away as he tried to deepen their kissing.

Yet as he pressed into Jack’s crotch there was no hardness.  Ianto pulled back in shock.

There was none of that cocky smiling or any sign of arousal on Jack’s face.  There was just concerned tenderness and understanding.

Ianto felt like a fool.  He thought Jack wanted him but of course he wanted the real Ianto.  He was nothing against the man Jack said he had been.

The Welshman turned and ran.  He only got as far as the front door as the cold air around the portal reminded him of his state of undress.

He collapsed beside it his knees curled up wanting to disappear.  Ianto tried to shrink smaller as he heard Jack approach and sit next to him.

“Ianto Jones you are a sore trial for a man.  Do you have any idea how difficult it is not to be aroused in the presence of such erotic beauty?

“You forget how much I know you and how much experience I have.  I can tell the difference between genuine desire and an attempt to please me so I won’t leave.

“I know what it’s like to be lonely Ianto, how desperate it can make you.  You don’t have to try and please me Ianto, I’m not going to leave you,” Jack said tenderly with a tentative stroke of Ianto’s arm.

The Welshman sprung and curled himself around Jack.  He didn’t cry but he did shake uncontrollably.  Strong arms cradled him as they had done on the beach so long ago.

When he was calmer, Jack lifted him up and carried him to the bed.  The American stripped off himself and spooned the Welshman against his naked body.

There was no flash of fear in Ianto instead the intimacy made him feel safe.  Within those protecting arms the young man knew everything would be alright, he wouldn’t ever be alone again.


	16. Chapter Sixteen

Ianto knew they were taking longer to reach this mysterious man who might have all the answers than they should.  He didn’t complain as he was, in a way, glad.

In the week since Ianto tried to offer himself to Jack, they continued to sleep naked together but that was it.  The Welshman knew that the American was waiting for him to be ready; he had said he needed his trust.

That didn’t stop Jack playing dirty though.  While the travelled a bit each day they always stopped for romantic walks, visited out of the way sights of interest and had intimate meals.

Jack didn’t say anything about the life Ianto could no longer remember.  He did though tell more outrageous stories, edited, the young man now suspected, to down play all his sexual encounters.

He was trying to behave like the almost perfect gentlemen and Ianto knew he was falling in love.  The way Jack acted it was easy to forget that he wasn’t quite the man Jack was in love with.  It was however the closest to someone being in love with him, really in love with him, that Ianto could remember.

The problem was that he often found himself assailed by emotions that were not his own.  Triggered like the grief for his lost, unremembered friends but by things that seemed totally random to him.

Cliché phrases from Jack suddenly filled him with affection.  A child playing flying aeroplanes with a salt pot in a cafe made him feel a twinge of fear.  Also the suggestion that they do timed runs around a ruined castle should not have made him feel hard.

Then there was the night they watched Jurassic Park III in a local cinema’s retro night.  Not close to his choice of viewing, but it had the advantage of not having CCTV security.

Ianto had never seen the film before but he was suddenly grabbed by the urge to make out with Jack in the middle of the pterodactyl cage chase.  Sneaking a glance at the man next to him he knew the American knew exactly what he was thinking.

The mix of impulses and emotion were confusing.  He couldn’t tell if he wanted to give in to them because he trusted them or because he wanted Jack.

It hadn’t taken long for him to realise just how much he wanted Jack.  For the last three nights Ianto had wanted to just turn around and kiss him until it lead somewhere, but now he feared his previous insecurities would make Jack reject him for his own sake.

The Welshman really was beginning to envy the man he had been.  He was sure the old him would have just made out with Jack in the cinema.  He would dealt with his hard on at the castle by taking Jack against the ancient walls instead of using the bathroom the way the new Ianto had.

Being romanced by Jack was making things worse.  Ianto had the strange feeling that the older man was taking advantage of the fact that he was a dating novice.

Jack had claimed that he was experienced in bed, but he didn’t seem that experience at dating and was using Ianto to try out his techniques.  Then Welshman hoped that, when he was himself again, that he would appreciate the older man’s efforts, because the current him really did.

He wanted to make love to Jack every night, after every romantic date but the ghost of his old self wasn’t going away.  Just as he was about to lean closer and kiss the other man, Ianto felt the old him stir within him and he backed down a little afraid. 

Throughout all this Captain Jack Harkness watched his lover.  Saw the war within Ianto that was grinding down his spirit.

He knew somehow he had to get the echoes of his Ianto and this new Ianto to merge.  It was almost cute that they both had the same inhibitions to overcome.

So Jack spent his nights holding on to Ianto and trying to think of the perfect date.  Then quite by chance he found it.


	17. Chapter Seventeen

There was something vibrant and excitable about Jack this morning.  Ianto noticed that they hadn’t gotten ready to leave their current house, to move on like they had been.

The American was up to something.  He had been using phone box down the street and plotting things all yesterday and Ianto was eager to know what it was.

That was why the Welshman didn’t object when Jack stepped close to him and carefully undid his tie.  His eyes asked for trust and Ianto gave it to him without hesitation.

When the silk was free Jack held it up at eye level, the message was clear and Ianto turned so that his tie could be used to blind him.  The American walked around him and placed a kiss on his lips which the Welshman allowed to deepen.

Jack then took him by the hand and led him to the car.  He secured the young man inside the vehicle and dashed around to the driver side and they took off at speed.

They drove quite a way with Jack singing excitedly.  He had a fabulous voice and Ianto was happy to sit in the darkness and listen to it all day.

However they drove only for an hour.  Then Jack left him alone in the car for a few minutes before getting Ianto out.

The older man took the younger’s hand steered him gently.  He heard doors being opened and closed behind them and the cool morning air was suddenly replaced with humid heat.

Jack slipped the jacket from his shoulders before tugging the blindfold over his head.  Ianto opened his eyes and was met with wondrous greenery.

“We have the whole place to ourselves,” Jack said pushing a few buttons on his wrist strap and the air filled with birdsong.

The American led him down a path between the plants.  They stopped to read the signs detailing what they were and what butterflies they attracted.

As they continued to admire the butterfly farm’s beauty it seemed to Ianto that he had fallen asleep and was walking in a dream, literally.  It felt like his jungle and it was almost perfect.

Desire and mischief that felt both familiar and new built up inside Ianto.  For once though he didn’t suppress it, he wanted his dream to become real.

They had reached the start again and Jack looked at him uncertainly.  Whether the American was unsure what to do next or unsure of the Welshman’s reaction to being brought to this tropical feeling paradise Ianto didn’t care.

He just gave Jack a brilliant, mischievous smile then turned around and ran back into the plants.  The older man laughed and called out.

“I’m going to count to twenty and then I’m going to come and get ya.  One... two...”

Ianto felt elated and swiftly removed his shoes and socks.  The gravel was uncomfortable beneath his feet but not painful.

“Three... four... five...six...”

Ianto had his shirt off and threw it towards a plant at random scattering butterflies and kept running.

“Seven... eight... nine...  ten...eleven...twelve...”

There went his trousers.  It didn’t matter that the farm wasn’t that big, so long as his clothes were far enough apart.

“Thirteen... fourteen...” and away with the vest.

“Fifteen... sixteen... seventeen... eighteen...”

The boxers were gone too now and Ianto loved the feel of the jungle’s humidity against his bare skin as he moved away.

“Nineteen… twenty, here I come ready or not,” Jack called out.  Ianto looked down, _Oh yes I’m ready._

It wasn’t long before Ianto could hear Jack running behind him.  Sometimes he put on a spurt of speed and sometimes he slowed down.

He laughed as he ran feeling alive and happy.  Ianto was in his dream and his lover was chasing him.

Suddenly he was tackled from the side and they crashed into a flower bed.  Ianto rolled laughing until he realised he was pinned beneath Jack’s naked body.

“Mine,” the older man growled possessively.

“Yes,” Ianto replied before his mouth was pounced upon and devoured in a kiss.

Jack pulled back and Ianto could see he was still wearing his wrist strap.  The older man reached down between leather and skin and slid out a tube of lube.

Ianto laughed in delight and was swiftly kissed again.  Familiar fingers were once again at his entrance and again the Welshman pushed into them to tell them to get inside.

This time he was not bound as Jack marked his torso with love bites.  This time his hands ran across as much skin as they could.

As he was opened, his prostate teased and his skin puzzled, Ianto was overwhelmed and clung to Jack, his nails digging in deep.  Far from putting the older man off it became an encouragement to do more.

Ianto whimpered as Jack removed his fingers.  Only to smile when he felt the head of Jack’s cock poised to take their place.

When Jack didn’t move to enter further Ianto looked up.  There was an intense expression on the American’s face and the young man was spellbound by his eyes.

“Mine,” Jack informed him once more.

“Yes f...” _forever_ was lost within Ianto’s moan and Jack thrust in hard hitting his prostate.

Their coupling was powerful and passionate with the intensity of lovers reuniting.  Jack called “mine” and “Ianto” with every thrust and was answered “Yes,” “yours” and “Jack” in return.

Jack’s fingers curled expertly around the Welshman’s cock.  He controlled every inch of the young man’s pleasure and Ianto wanted him to.

They came together, perfectly in tune.  Jack gave Ianto a deep kiss withdrew slowly.  He slipped his arms under Ianto and rolled them over so they lay facing each other on their sides.

Jack pulled him in close not caring about the stickiness between them.  Ianto looked into those eyes, they were still intense but glowing with post coital pleasure.

Those strong powerful arms told the Welshman that Jack was never going to let him go.  Right then Ianto didn’t want him to.


	18. Chapter Eighteen

Ianto Jones still felt that he was in a dream.  Above him the sky was white and he was surrounded by plants.

A peacock butterfly landed for a moment on Jack’s buttocks.  Ianto felt that it suited him but the insect flew away just as quickly as it came.

Ianto took the time now to study his dream lover.  He had a brilliant smile with dazzling teeth and the strong, powerful arms of a hero.

The Welshman’s fingers traced a path down them then over Jack’s ribs towards the curve of his arse.  He had a perfect golden tan compared to Ianto’s own milky white skin.

His fingers turned and travelled upwards towards Jack’s torso.  They were tentative touches as if he were an explorer.

Well defined pectoral muscles and _oh_ _hard nipples_.  Ianto could feel something else hardening as his hand roamed.

The Welshman cautiously made his hand to glide southwards.  Jack gave a deep moan of pleasure as Ianto’s hand stroked that impressive length.

Ianto however suddenly realised there was something wrong with this dream.  He hadn’t realised that he’d let it show until Jack asked.

“What’s wrong?”

“It’s silly,” Ianto replied.

“What?”

“When I dream about you in the jungle, I just realised, there’s never any bird song,” Ianto told him looking away.

“Then there will be no birdsong,” Jack announced and reached around Ianto to press the button’s on his wrist strap.

Only the birdsong didn’t end.  Instead Ianto felt the splash of water from the sprinkler system.  Both men scrambled up automatically not wanting the soil to turn to mud over them.

The both looked at each other and laughed.  When Jack reached again for his wrist strap to turn the water off, Ianto’s hand stopped him.

Jack gave him an intrigued look and Ianto bend over to pick up the tube of lube from the ground.  The older man was lost in an ‘I’m checking you out’ stare then realised what the Welshman had retrieved.

Immediately Jack rushed to the nearest tree and turned around facing it, his arse sticking out invitingly.  Ianto couldn’t help laughing at his eagerness.

The Welshman reached up into the leaves and bent them so that the water dripped on Jack’s back.  The older man shuddered and Ianto stroked away the water and the dirt from the flower bed.

He let the sprinkler water wash his fingers before he slicked them up.  Ianto let his hand seek Jack’s entrance and the action felt familiar, he knew exactly where to probe.

Ianto eased a single finger in and Jack moaned contentedly.  He let the digit roam exploring the warmth, knowing automatically what moves to make, knowing when to add a second, then a third.

The Welshman let his fingers get on with their work as they seemed to know now to make Jack writhe and sigh.  Instead Ianto turned his attention to Jack’s back.

There were fingernail marks and scratches where he had raked the perfect flesh.  He pressed his lips to each mark kissing them better.

Suddenly Ianto wanted to make other marks along Jack’s spine.  He sucked the flesh making a neat row of love bites.

Ianto became achingly aware of how much he was neglecting himself.  It was satisfying to hear Jack’s complaining moan as he withdrew his fingers.

With care he lined his slicked cock up with Jack’s entrance and trust in.

“Yes,” Jack called out in triumph.

The warmth around him and the sudden closeness to Jack were both so wonderful that Ianto couldn’t help agreeing.  He pulled out and in again savouring the new, familiar sensation.

His confidence grew and his thrusts became more powerful and deeper.  Jack responded with encouragement for more with every one.

Ianto’s hands moved around Jack’s body, one over the American’s heart to steady himself the other around his cock.  The Welshman stroked in tune with his thrust and Jack moved in time with him.

He could feel Jack getting close beneath him and increased his speed wanting to send the older man over the edge.  The sensation of Jack’s arse contracting around his cock took Ianto over with him.

Jack leaned against the tree even though it was now bowing a bit.  Ianto clung to Jack as he slipped from his body not trusting his own legs.

“This is a good dream,” Ianto whispered quietly.

“What?” Jack asked straightening and turning so that Ianto could cling to his chest instead of his back.

“I don’t want to wake up and be me again,” Ianto confessed quietly.

“Oh Ianto,” he replied with a sigh.

Jack reached around Ianto and deactivated the sprinklers.  He then took the Welshman’s hand and they walked through the butterfly farm gathering up the young man’s clothes.

“They’re ruined,” Ianto said looking down unsure how Jack would react.

“We can buy more,” the older man replied as they walked to the entrance.

Jack rung the clothes out despite Ianto’s squeal of protest, he then hung them on some nearby greenery.  The American bent down to where his own clothes were in a neat pile away from the water and grabbed his gun belt.

He went to the pouch that contained his spare bullets and fished inside for something.  He withdrew a little green drawstring pouch.

“Of all the gifts I bought you for our anniversary this is the one I had the most doubt about giving you.  I didn’t want you to misinterpret my meaning, my feelings and yet this is the one thing I most wish I could have given you.

“You see I cannot really offer you marriage.  In your current condition it wouldn’t be fair, you don’t know all my terrible flaws the way you should.  I’m not sure...” Jack trailed off with a sigh.

He opened the pouch and withdrew from it a golden ring.  It was a dragon swallowing its own tail.

Jack took Ianto’s right hand and carefully slipped it onto his ring finger.  He then brought hand and ring to his lips and kissed them.

“This isn’t a dream Ianto Jones this is real.  You’re the man that just took me from behind and the man who’s patient as I ramble on.  I love you and...”

Jack wasn’t given the opportunity to finish that sentence.  Ianto dived forward and kissed his lover passionately.

He wasn’t sure exactly what his lover was trying to say but he understood _I love you_.  Ianto understood because he was in love with Jack.

They stood there holding each other and kissing for a long time.  Neither wanted to let go of the moment but Ianto’s stomach interrupted with a rumble.

They both stepped back chuckling.  Jack looked at his wrist strap.

“We have a few more hours,” he announced.

Jack bent down again and withdrew a hamper hidden in the bushes as dry as Jack’s clothes.  Basket in one hand and Ianto’s in the other the American lead them back into the farm.

The older man lay out a blanket for them to sit on and they had a picnic, naked in Eden, amid the butterflies.

 


	19. Chapter Nineteen

“What do you think about having blond hair?” Jack asked suddenly one morning about a week after they made love amid the butterflies.

“Huh?” Ianto replied trying not to dwell on the sudden pang of hurt he felt.

“And a beard,” Jack continued looking at Ianto’s face as though trying to assess whether or not the look would look good.

“Mind you I think you might have to tan a bit too to pull the look off,” he added still not seeing how still Ianto had become.

“Well?” Jack asked but Ianto couldn’t find an answer.  He wanted to know why Jack suddenly wasn’t happy with the way he looked.

“It’s only temporary, a wig, a false beard and some self tan.  I could help to make sure you got an even cover,” Jack said trying to reassure then waggling his eyebrows to make Ianto laugh despite himself.

“The man we’re going to meet is in the middle of the city.  Last time we went into town they managed to find us, probably using some sort of facial recognition scan with the CCTV.  If I’m to get you to him safely then we will need some sort of disguise,” Jack explained patiently.

“Oh,” Ianto said suddenly understanding and hating himself a little for doubting Jack.  “If we’re going to use self tan then we better get a body scrub.  It takes better if you remove all the dead skin cells first.”

“How do you know that?” Jack asked looking at him strangely.  Ianto blinked and tried to think.

“I don’t remember I just know, like I heard it somewhere once but I can’t recall who told me,” Ianto replied worried.

Jack though just smiled and kissed him.  “Maybe I should give you a hand making sure you are thoroughly scrubbed too,” he suggested and the Welshman chuckled indulgently.

Since the magical day in the butterfly farm it stopped bothering Ianto completely that he had another man’s instinct and occasional memories.  He knew technically he was the other man, but it still felt like he was someone else until that day.

They had gone back from the butterfly farm to the house and made love again.  They went out again later for enough Chinese takeaway to last them a few days, Jack getting the order while Ianto waited in the car wearing only a raincoat and shoes.

They spent the rest of the evening and the whole of the next day naked with Ianto experiencing all the sensual and sexual delights being with Jack had to offer.  Between couplings they would sometimes talk but mostly they had sat and stared at each other, touched each other and held each other.

Ianto didn’t care what terrible flaws Jack could possibly have.  Their terrible beginning was more than enough of a clue that there was more to the man he loved than he was being allowed to see.

The Welshman knew he would have loved Jack even without the other man’s emotions burning within him.  Jack had saved Ianto from his own desperately lonely life and filled it with joy and understanding.

Jack and Ianto had continued their travels but with an air of honeymoon romance.  It wasn’t so much that they made love in the morning and evenings, but the times during the day when it took all their patience to find somewhere private.

This was the first time the mysterious man who could help had been mentioned since Jack told Ianto what happened to him.  He hadn’t been forgotten amid their trysts, both were consciously trying not to think about it, but it was something they both had to face.

There was a real world that they were hiding from where Ianto was in danger.  The Welshman knew Jack wanted him to be safe, but Jack also wanted the man he was before to be back.

Knowing that made the young man feel a little inadequate, which was why the talk of his changing his appearance hurt.  Yet Ianto also wanted to be his other self again, he seemed so much braver and so much more loved.

“So after you’ve made a thorough inspection to insure that I am fully scrubbed, tanned and satisfied, I get disguised and we go into town to meet this mysterious man of yours,” Ianto stated feeling suddenly very nervous.

“I will be disguised too and I will make sure you are thoroughly satisfied, chase away those nerves,” Jack said reading him as he always did.

“So who is this mysterious man?” Ianto asked not even noticing that he felt no shyness in asking as he would have before.

“His name’s Archie and he runs Torchwood in Glasgow.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was the last chapter that I posted before Children of Earth was shown (it might not have been the last one written as I sometimes write a few in advance). I wrote a one shot to express my grief and took a break from writing but this story was so consuming me that I soon had to continue, albeit with a different ending from what I had intended.


	20. Chapter Twenty

Ianto really wasn’t sure how Jack managed to pull off his disguise so well and still be sexy.  He had in a set of false teeth, wore make up to make his face and hands paler, dark contact lenses and auburn wig.

Ianto admitted it didn’t look like Jack at all, yet he still seemed the same confident, striding man he was before.  The Welshman preferred his lover without the false teeth though, that was the only aspect that felt creepy to him.

His own look seemed quite peculiar to him too.  Ianto had to resist the urge to scratch his false beard and the longer blond hair tickled a bit.

Jack looked him over when he was in his own disguise and Ianto suddenly knew they were going to be another hour before they left.  His lover it seemed didn’t care what he looked like and had the grace to remove those teeth before he pounced.

They drove through Glasgow wearing jeans and t-shirts.  It felt awkward and fake after all those suits that Jack liked him to wear.

He was alert and tense after what happened last time but Jack’s cure for nerves had worked a bit to keep him calm.  That and the reassurance of Jack’s presence by his side.

They drove to the university and went straight to reception.  Ianto’s eyes flickered over everyone but he was relieved to realise they were just students and none of them wore the strange black suits of their pursuers.

“Can I help you?” the receptionist asked.

“We have and appointment to see Professor Campbell,” Jack informed her in a flawless Scottish accent.

“One moment, what name should I give,” she asked reaching for the phone.

“There you are, you’re late,” came a gruff voice from the left.

A man walked towards them, six foot one, his head a mass of red hair which was beginning to turn white and he looked about twenty years older than Jack.  He wore the sort of tweeds one expected from a professor but with a Lead Zeppelin t-shirt that one didn’t.

“Archie good to see you again,” Jack said walking over the man arms open wide.

“You can stop that right there.  Those shenanigans will not work on me come on,” Archie replied and began to lead them away from the main entrance towards the rest of the Campus.

“How did you know we were here?” Jack asked as they entered the library.

“You shoulda made him wear the contact lenses too or at least some dark glasses.  He checked out the area like pro, clocked the security cameras and got his retinas scanned,” Archie replied quietly.

He led them into the staff area and to the toilets.  At the door Jack raised an eyebrow at the Scotsman.

“You can take off those bloody ridiculous disguises before you meet the missus.  This building may be full of students and lecturers but it’s Torchwood that controls everything security wise,” Archie told him.

“I didn’t know you were married,” Jack said removing the contact lenses and urging Ianto to take off the fake beard and moustache.

“That’s because I made sure Torchwood didn’t know.  He’s dear to you?” the Scot asked motioning at Ianto.

“Very,” Jack replied.

“Well my wife is dear to me.  There’s more at stake here than the two of you.  We are going to have to trust each other, you must trust me about your young man, so I am entrusting you with the secret of my wife.

“Besides she wants to meet both of you, she thinks she can help,” he added slightly irritably.

Jack merely smiled widely and began to wash the pale make-up from his face.  When they were themselves again Archie led them out of the staff area to one of the reading rooms.

There the Scotsman pressed a disguised button and the floor in on corner fell down.  There were steps to the side and he led them beneath the library.

There were electric lights lining the walls but it was still dim.  Ianto reached out and took hold of Jack’s hand as they walked down and along.

They emerged in what seemed to be the cellar of an ordinary looking house.  Again Jack seemed to be surprised.

“That was just a normal escape tunnel built with the library.  The entrance to Torchwood is nearby but I thought friendlier surroundings might be best,” Archie said clearly enjoying putting Jack out a little.

Archie lead them up into what had to be his house.  There was the aroma of baking and the sound of children playing close by.

The Scotsman took them towards the kitchen were Ianto saw an amazing and beautiful woman.

Her skin was a soft mauve in different shades suggesting that it was a natural colour and not makeup.  Her eyes were pastel green and her hair a rich chocolate brown.

Ianto was overwhelmed with the sudden sensation of meeting someone new, yet they were also someone he recognised.  As he tried to remember where he’s seen her before his head suddenly hurt.

“Are you alright?” she asked taking his elbow gently.

“Forgive me Dortrecia I have a sudden headache.  Tell me have we met before?” Ianto asked as the pain began to recede.  She glanced back at Campbell before replying.

“Our paths crossed briefly once and you may call me Aggie.  Archie told me of your predicament hopefully we can help,” she said kindly.

Before more conversation could continue they were suddenly assailed by a horde of children.  From the reactions it was easy to tell these were Archie and Aggie’s grandchildren.

Ianto complemented Aggie on their beauty and was suddenly being manoeuvred into the garden to watch them play.  He glanced back at Jack who nodded and let himself be settled in the sun.


	21. Chapter Twenty-one

“Your wife is Dortrecia Agnathaya of Centhos?” Jack said looking shocked at Archie as Ianto left the room.

“My beautiful Aggie yes.  Married by Centhos law obviously but that’s good enough for me,” the Scot said with pride.

“She’s the most influential Neutral Arbiter in the Galaxy,” Jack protested.

“So, Earth’s a neutral planet.  We have been known to host negotiations.  It’s how I met Aggie, how your Ianto met her,” Archie replied.

“There’s nothing on his file that...”

“Well there’s a lot missing from his file.  Don’t feel like he’s kept things from you.  Most of it I don’t think he’s aware of himself,” Archie said looking Jack in the eye.

“What’s going on Archie?  I got him out as soon as I got your warning.  I need to know, I need to keep him safe, I need to get him back,” Jack said urgently.

Instead of replying Archie led Jack to a small study.  He looked every inch the professor he was in brown leather chairs.  Outside the window they could hear the Scot’s grandchildren playing.

“In your long life have you ever heard of the Royal Order of Archivists?” Archie asked.

“The people in charge of the Public Record’s Office?” Jack asked knowing the answer was wrong.

“Not exactly,” Archie replied. “The Royal Order of Archivists was established several centuries before the PRO, by Queen Elisabeth I.

“Originally they were just in charge of the record keeping of her government.  Then she had an encounter with a certain Time Lord,” Archie said looking at him with a raised eyebrow.

“He does get around,” Jack said trying not to feel guilty.

“Unlike Torchwood’s founder, Queen Elizabeth was living during science’s infancy.  England no longer had faith in the power of the papacy and such an encounter would have been like confronting demons rather than aliens.

“She knew enough to know her nation’s survival was fortunate but as weaponry was evolving, she hoped that one day they would be able to deal with such threats.  The Royal Order of Archivists was set up to gather all information and knowledge of the unusual as well as the normal essentials for running a kingdom.

“When the English Civil war approached, the Order divided.  Most went to form the various archives that later made up the PRO.  Those that kept the more unworldly records went into hiding, in danger from Cromwell.

“The ROA established itself here when the University was built.  The members have been scattered in various archives, museums and libraries across Great Britain until the founding of Torchwood.

“It was easy for the ROA and Torchwood to combine forces as often our members were sought out.  Not all members of the ROA ended up in Torchwood, it was important we felt to have a little independence and the Institute didn’t always know what its Archivists were up to,” Archie said looking at Jack for a reaction.

“I know the importance of secrets and them not getting in the wrong hands.  My lover is an Archivist after all.  Is Ianto a member?” Jack asked.

“No.  Although the head of our Order and the majority of our members were at Canary Wharf, decisions to induct members are done by council of eight.  That includes myself, the chief Archivist of UNIT’s black Archive and a few other organisations like ourselves across the globe as well as a few civilian ones.

“When the decision regarding Ianto came up there were three things against him.  He was very young, only a year out of university, he was already showing signs of a blossoming relationship with Lisa Hallett and he was part of the Institute’s Psychic programme.

“George was a stubborn man and decided to teach Ianto our ways anyway.  We have memory techniques that we have been developing for centuries,” Archie said.

“Like Memory Traps where you set your mind in a kind of hypnotic state and you remember every sensation in great detail but the memory is caught.  You have to want to remember or trigger them to remember,” Jack said recalling the couple of times Ianto had helped him form perfect recall of an even.

Archie gave him a knowing look and he straightened up refusing to be embarrassed.  Although it must say something about Jack’s reputation that the Scot knew he had used a memory trap while having fantastic sex.

“That is only one memory technique that we use.  Some of the things we ask our members to remember are very dangerous.  We teach them to capture such memories and hide them with certain triggers.

“The person remembering has no knowledge of what it is they are remembering.  Our triggers are based on the traditional five senses.  A specific sight, sound, smell, taste and touch all individually selected so that none traditionally go together.

“The details of these triggers are separated physically and in terms of how they are labelled so that only the keeper and the mentor who requested the memory be recorded knows the true combination.

“All this was lost at Canary Wharf, the triggers, what it is Ianto remembers,” Archie said sadly.

“But someone knows that Ianto knows something,” Jack pressed.

“Yes and we have no way to find out what this something is.”

“But they thought they could.  Let me guess they have a mind probe,” Jack said darkly.  “Is this the result of their probing too deep?  Did they burn him out?”

“No he resisted or they would not have bothered with this elaborate charade.  This will probably be the only time you’re grateful for London and their psychic program.

“Ianto has had two very different kinds of mental training but he merged them.  Psychic training would have given him more tools to resist than our training alone.

“One of the reasons George overruled the council’s decision is that Ianto was often asked to observe at certain events, they wanted his psychic senses and we wanted his knowledge.

“No matter how hard they probed they couldn’t get his knowledge,” Archie told him gently.

“How do you know that?” Jack demanded suspicious and Archie sighed.

“As soon as Gwen Cooper told me that the two of you had disappeared and why, I knew Ianto was the target because of his brush with the ROA.  I tried to find him but two days after your trial began he disappeared.  No one knew where he was, every department thought he was with another and no one cared.

“When he reappeared the tortures he had suffered were evident but he was still him.  They sent in a UNIT doctor, not your Doctor Jones, to treat him.  She took samples but wasn’t allowed the time to examine them or him too closely.

“Records of Ianto’s time in prison, along with the medical records were sent to the Black Archives a month ago.  My fellow council member then passed them on to me,” Archie replied calmly.

“So they failed because he resisted so they decided to change him to be less resistant.  Made him lonely and docile,” Jack said sadly.  Archie didn’t bother agreeing.

“An alien therapy device _suddenly_ fell into UNIT’s hands just before your trial changed direction.  They began immediately, working on suppressing his memory and aspects of his personality including his psychic senses.  It’s all still there though,” Archie concluded.

“How can you be so sure?” Jack asked curiously as he was already sure his Ianto was still within.

“His reaction to Aggie.  Most people’s first encounter with an alien involves horror or curiosity.  The realisation that the universe is larger and the world smaller.

“Ianto didn’t react that way at all.  He recognised her, called her Dortrecia a title he shouldn’t remember.  He reached though the suppression and it hurt him.”

“So he might come back by himself?” Jack asked hopefully but Archie sadly shook his head.

“The therapy device used on Ianto never reached the Black Archives for storage.  Judging from how long they used it on him, I would say he resisted that too.

“They are still after him and remembering on his own might be extremely painful.  The only safe way to get him back is with the device,” Archie told him sadly.

“We are not really any further along than we were before.  I take it you have no idea of where they and this device are?”

“No but there are two things I know that you need to.  Firstly whoever is behind it, they’re alien.  That’s why Aggie is here, intergalactic contacts.

“Secondly, before I called with my warning, I was myself warned.  E-mail, text message, electronic phone calls even a fax, all telling me that you had to get Ianto out.

“They had certain marks and phrases that were a mix of Torchwood and ROA so I reacted immediately, plus I was watching your situation very closely.

“Afterwards I tried to investigate, find who sent them but I got nothing, not a trace of any of them.  I don’t just mean that I couldn’t find the point of origin, it was as though I had never received any of them.  The fax is the only proof I have left,” Archie said warningly.

“So we have a mysterious and powerful ally, or someone who wants Ianto knowledge for themselves,” Jack said wearily.

“We do have a name for our friend, Wormstrom.  There is no record of someone of that name within Torchwood or the Royal Order of Archivists.  There are a few in UNIT but they either don’t have the skills or the opportunity to send the message,” Archie told him gravely.

“So we’re not really any further forward from when we came.  We have a group of mercenaries hired by an alien chasing us and we have a mystery friend who may later turn out to be an enemy,” Jack said wearily.

“I wouldn’t say your visit was a complete waste of time.  We may not be as flash as London or Cardiff, but Torchwood 2 does have a complete medical facility.

“We can run tests on Ianto and when you’re gone I will send them, and the results from UNIT, to Doctor Jones to run a comparison with those from his time in prison,” Archie said.

“You want us to leave, I understand, your family,” Jack replies sympathetically.

“They have forgotten about me but they will remember soon enough.  Besides I have a lead.  One other thing Wormstrom said, “Beware York,” no idea what that means, I have no contacts in Yorkshire,” Archie said apologetically.

“Great, genuine or a trap whoever sent it knew we were going to have to take a look,” Jack said unhappily.

“I have one other thing,” the Scot said hesitantly.

“What?”

“Ianto’s psychic ability, I know it was damaged, understandably so during the Battle but it was still there?”

“Yes but since he forgot who he was he’s shown no sign of ability,” Jack said sadly.

“There is a drug in my possession designed to awaken such senses.  The effects of the drug are normally temporary but in a psychic like Ianto it might be enough for him to remember they are there,” Archie said cautiously.

“Why do you want him to have his psychic abilities back?” Jack asked suspicious once more.

“Ianto met Aggie during a peace conference, he was there to remember and sense.  He did, he provided a warning that saved many lives including Aggie’s.

“His psychic ability probably helped him resist what they did to him and it could certainly give you some warning if you are to be attacked again.

“I’ve set aside a room for the two of you.  We’ll do a batch of tests then you can decide whether or not to try the drug.  I would use it here, that way you still have the medical facilities if something goes wrong,” Archie said with a slight reluctance.

“What aren’t you telling me?” Jack asked.

“It might not work or it might react with what they’ve done to him and make things worse.  The first set of tests will bring up any extreme dangers, so we know not to administer it, but there is still a risk.

“Warnings of potential dangers aside, I would not make my suggestion if the risk of his psychic ability waking up by itself were not already there.

“You know him, both versions of him better than I.  If you have seen any hint that the two personalities are merging then you know there is the strong possibility that something will trigger an awakening and I am told they can be quite devastating,” Archie said gravely.

“We will run your tests, see if there are any ‘extreme dangers’ and then I will talk to Ianto.  It’s his mind, he should decide,” Jack said.

“As you wish,” Archie agreed then judging his guest’s anxiousness led him to join his lover in the garden.


	22. Chapter Twenty-two

There was something very reluctant about Jack tonight.  Like the fact they were in a bedroom and he made no attempt to get them both naked.

Ianto had spent a pleasant couple of hours in the sun with Aggie and her grandchildren before Jack had come out to bring him inside.  Archie led them back to the escape tunnel and into a side tunnel that in turn led to a medical ward.

The Welshman allowed himself to be subjected to all their tests, even though he was sure neither of them were qualified doctors.  They seemed to understand enough about what the equipment said to pronounce him healthy.

Archie then gave a vial of bright red liquid to Jack with whispered instructions.  Although they returned to the peace of the garden, whatever was in the vial made the American thoughtful.

They had a fabulous home cooked dinner before they were shown up to a room.  It suited the university setting with all its wood panelling.

“What’s wrong?” Ianto asked.  “Did he find something wrong with me?  Did he tell you I’d done something bad?”

“No, no,” Jack said slumping on the bed.  “He doesn’t know what it is they are after or who they are.  He confirmed that you still have your memory in there somewhere.  There may also be a lead in York.”

“That’s good.  And that vial he gave you, was that to help me recover my memory.  A sort of reverse of your retcon?” Ianto asked.  Jack pulled the vial out and held it between them.

“No this is a sense enhancer.  Our tests proved that some of your senses were dulled when they changed you.  This stimulates them temporarily, Archie hopes though it will have a permanent effect,” Jack said quietly.

Ianto frowned he didn’t feel like his senses were dull.  Maybe that’s because they were the Booksellers senses and not those of the man Jack knew.

“You’re not sure about me taking this,” Ianto stated knowing Jack in ways that surprised him.

“It could have no effect or make matters worse.  Ianto the senses it stimulates...”

“Is this a full dose?” Ianto interrupted curiously taking the vial.

“Yes you drink it,” Jack answered.  “Ianto the senses...”

“Then we could test it with just a sip,” Ianto replied opening the vial and sipping before Jack could stop him.

He re-stoppered the bottle and found Jack looking at him with concerned eyes.  They sat there for a few moments in silence but he felt no different.

“It might take a while to metabolise,” Ianto suggested.

To his surprise though Jack sagged.  He was so used to him be liveliness and life he suddenly seemed drained.

“I was really hoping that Archie would have some answers.  I want this to be over.  I’m fed up of hiding.  I want to go home and be safe with you,” there was frustration and sadness in his voice.

Ianto automatically wrapped his arms around Jack and held him close.  He made soothing noises and rubbed circles in his back.

The Welshman remembered the bottle of massage oil that Aggie had given him in the garden.  She thought he could use some pampering after the headache, but now Ianto felt that Jack needed it more.

With a soft kiss to Jack’s lips Ianto began to undo the other’s shirt and trousers.  The American looked so dejected that he didn’t seem to care what the Welshman was doing.

Ianto poured the oil onto his hands and rubbed them to warm it.  He began to work on Jack’s back allowing the sense of familiarity guide him.

It took a long time for the tension to drain out of Jack’s shoulders and spine.  That done Ianto turned his attention to his lover’s scalp.

Arms, torso, face and legs all got Ianto’s complete attention until all stiffness was released.  Jack was lying on his back, legs over the edge of the bed and only one area was untouched and tense.

Jack had his eyes closed, utterly relaxed as Ianto turned his attention to the proud erection.  Stroking the shaft and massaging his balls didn’t seem quite enough though.

Slick fingers probed Jack’s entrance and began to push in.  He felt the tension release in Jack’s arse and throb in his cock.

Jack moaned ecstatically under his ministrations.  It was a beautiful sight, a wonderful feeling to be able to give such pleasure.

“Ianto,” Jack called as he came and Ianto massaged him still through the aftershocks until he was spent.

Ianto pulled Jack up the bed before stripping off and laying beside him.  He ignored his own hardness too enamoured of the man curling his arms around him to disturb his peace.

 

 


	23. Chapter Twenty-three

Captain Jack Harkness recognised the aphrodisiac properties of the massage oil when it made all his nerves tingle with pleasure.  He felt absolutely gorgeous.  It was an experience that he wanted his wonderful, patient, Ianto to share.

But first things first, Jack was fully prepared and not the kind of man to let a good hard cock go to waste.  With a kiss he turned Ianto onto his back and lowered himself swiftly onto the Welshman’s shaft.

Pleasure greater than he had known before surged with every touch of his prostate.  It made Jack feel powerful and so alive and wish he hadn’t been so recently spent.

He moved fast and hard around Ianto and the young man came within minutes.  Feeling Ianto’s gush inside him gave him a second orgasm.

Jack’s cock was stirring nicely again but he had made himself a promise.  He reached for the massage oil and poured some over Ianto’s hot chest making him jump at the sensation.

He rubbed the scented oil deep into Ianto’ torso and arm and gently into the skin of his face.  Jack then moved down to those powerful legs ignoring the prize just as Ianto had.

Massaging another had never felt this good.  He wanted to leave no spot un-relaxed.  Ianto’s giggles as he massaged the Welshman’s toes made him tingle all over.

Ianto mewed gently as Jack turned him over.  The Welsh voice moaned erotically as the Immortal turned his fingers first to the scalp then the back, kneading the muscles deep.

It was the natural conclusion to massage inside Ianto, preparing him.  The Welshman shifted to give him access and to Jack there was nothing about the man before him that didn’t turn him on.

Ianto arched and moaned softly as Jack touched his prostate.  Every time he did the Immortal felt his own rush of pleasure.  He could come just from the way the Welshman writhed under his touch.

Unable to wait he penetrated Ianto swiftly.  Pleasure rushed hot through Jack.  He pulled Ianto up first onto all fours and then to kneel up allowing him to penetrate deeper.

Even Jack with his vast experience had never had anything affect him quite like this.  It was as though every touch of Ianto’s prostate touched his own doubling the effect.

When their hands met around Ianto’s cock all conscious thought left them.  They were lost in passion and pleasure; they were the whole world.

They came together and Ianto slumped forward until Jack pulled him onto his lap.  The Welshman leant against Jack’s chest and everything was wonderful.

With reluctance Jack moved Ianto so that he could slip free.  He wanted to stay but it hurt his legs.

He wasn’t prepared for the Welshman to flip him so that he lay on his back.  Ianto moved above him, bending down to kiss him.

The sight and feel of his lover was enough to stir him again.  The massage oil he felt was powerful stuff and he would have words with whoever gave it to Ianto, mostly along the lines of “where can I get some more?”

They made love three more times before the flesh became weaker than the spirit could give strength to.  They lay entwined, tired, but exchanging the occasional touch and kiss.

It was then that Jack realised beside the warm satisfied feeling he could feel something else, love.  It was strong, undaunted, constant and Ianto’s.

Jack realised Ianto must have felt the surprise of this revelation because he suddenly felt concern.  A touch and a kiss mixed with his need to reassure was all it took for that love to return.

It was overwhelming.  He never thought he would ever be loved this way but to come from his beloved Ianto.

That was what had driven their passion that night.  Ianto’s desire, adoration and love empowering them both physically and emotionally; the best aphrodisiac in the universe.

Inside Jack a barrier crumbled.  He let his own love for Ianto flow through him in a way he had always feared to before.

Ianto’s love entwined with his adding strength and power to Jack so that he felt like a god, a sexually exhausted god.  Feeling deep love the two of them held each other tight and drifted into sleep.

That night the whole of Glasgow, awake or sleeping felt loved.

 

 


	24. Chapter Twenty-four

It was late lunchtime the next day before Jack and Ianto emerged from their room.  It was a wonder that they bothered.

They walked with their arms around each other, they stopped every few feet to kiss and they didn’t acknowledge the presence of their hosts as they sat for lunch.

They didn’t speak just gazed at each other except to reach the occasional morsel of food which they fed their lover.  Between bites they petted and kissed.

Archie glared at Aggie when she motioned for them to leave.  She had already fed their grandchildren who were off playing.  The Dortrecia was feeling particularly smug.

Archie wrote a note and left it for the lovers on the table before picking up his plate and glass and relocating to the kitchen.  Neither Jack or Ianto noticed them leave or the note.

They just decided half an hour later to relocate to the bedroom to resume their morning activities.  Archie was rather grateful that he had given them a soundproofed room.

The massage oil might have worn off but they were both very much aware of the others emotions.  Jack had never explored his psychic abilities, afraid of them as they increased over the years.  To Ianto they were both new and familiar and he didn’t care.

They alternated between making love, dosing and just staring at each other.  They were both testing this new closeness, both coming to understand each other better as both got faint glimpses of how the other felt inside.

They were interrupted at dinner time by Aggie knocking on the door.  She brought them something to eat and was surprised by Jack kissing her and taking the tray from her as she stared at him in his naked glory.

Ianto had no chance to feel shock or embarrassment himself at his lover’s lack of inhibition, not when Jack turned to face him and a wave of desire shot through him.  The older man put the tray down and proceeded to let the Welshman know exactly how beautiful his was.

Hunger returned their attention to dinner an hour later.  This time though it wasn’t the same loving exchange they had made at lunch time. 

Reality was starting to creep in.  They both knew they couldn’t continue this.  They couldn’t stay wrapped up in each other’s feeling excluding the world.

Only neither wanted to let go.  No one wants to lose the feeling that they are loved, especially after the loneliness’s both men knew.  In silence they both agreed that after tonight they would stop sharing emotion.

That didn’t mean they couldn’t have one memorable night to keep with them for the rest of their lives.  Ianto didn’t even notice his own mind shift to capture tonight in perfect memory.

That night they explored each other more thoroughly.  No position or penetration was left untried, every point of pleasure pushed into ecstasy.

Yet the best moment of the night was the last.  When they were both physically exhausted and curled tight around each other.

All that was left was to feel love and it changed them.

There was no exchange of vows, no words of promise but they both knew they were bound forever to the other.  Jack would always be Ianto’s and Ianto would always be Jack’s no matter what.

And both would do everything in their power to be true to this exchange.  Neither felt any need to doubt the other ever again.

They were one and not even death would change that.

They both drifted off to sleep, at peace with the universe and dreamed a shared paradise.  They were naked in a jungle but there was no hide and seek for they had both found the prize.

For the second night in a row, love was in the Glaswegian air.


	25. Chapter Twenty-five

Jack and Ianto decided that it would probably save time if they made love in the shower the next morning.  They hurriedly dressed then spent a few minutes slowly kissing before then headed down to breakfast.

The lovers ate breakfast with equal gusto.  This morning it was Aggie who seemed put out and Archie who was enjoying how well the food was received.

With a look Ianto rose and went to take the children into the garden.  Jack’s eyes glittered darkly as he placed both the vial Archie had given him and the bottle of massage oil from Aggie on the table.

“Strawberry Cream Soda, flat but very cute,” Jack said lifting the vial of red liquid given to him by Archie.

“I’m sure by now my feelings for Ianto are quite clear to you.  I know my reputation when it comes to people I care for speaks for itself.

“So an explanation would be nice before I start an intergalactic incident, because this stuff did a hell of a lot more than just awakening Ianto’s awareness,” Jack’s voice vibrated with quiet anger as he glared at the head of Torchwood Two.

“You’re right your reputation precedes you, which is why I had to make sure you could be trusted.  We also had to test a theory,” Aggie answered for her husband.

“And?” Jack demanded.

“We still don’t know who’s behind this but I know what it is they are after.  We know why they did what they did to Ianto, what they intended.

“I know that while Wormstrom’s message was to entice you to York, it was a benevolent act because York is a safe haven.  And we know now where they took Ianto when he was being changed,” Aggie told him her voice calm.

Jack felt stunned.  Archie had virtually told him he knew nothing and now, after a day of vibrant sex, Aggie suddenly knew everything.

“So what are they after?” Jack demanded knowing that was what the intergalactic negotiator was protecting.

“There are two old and powerful civilisations who have been at war on and off for the past five hundred years.  Twenty years ago they decided once and for all to make a lasting peace and form alliance between them.

“The problem was that each side had allies, enemies and internal unrest both from seized territories and factions within their own populous.  Most did want peace but the minority who wanted the wars to continue had the resources to get them started again.

“So they intended to negotiate two treaties.  One for the public and a private one.  They would both say the same things but where the public treaty was a bland exchange needed for immediate peace, the private treaty detailed the exchanges, changes within their political systems and promises needed to steer their nations into lasting peace but it would take decades to enact.

“I was chosen as negotiator but I was not privy to all the details of the private exchange.  There were documents and clauses that had been negotiated directly, their contents known to both parties but not to me.

“We are talking the ownership of planets, secrets, technologies, all things that have their own value as well as being a point of outrage should their inclusion in the treaty be known by the anarchists.

“The private treaty and its details were too inflammatory to allow to exist in the written form outside the negotiations.  So an alternative method of keeping this treaty and _all_ its details was preserved.

“Three people, one from each race and a neutral individual were chosen to house the private treaty.  They were to see and remember every detail including the precise nature of the secrets, technical details, planetary values both geologically and in terms of population resources, everything.

“A trusted individual touched the minds of the guardians to allow them perfect recall but only under certain conditions.  The rest of the time they wouldn’t remember a thing about it.

“Centhos is psychically silent and the obvious target so it could not be one of us.  Both civilisations knew of Earth, Torchwood and the Order of Archivists and we asked the Order to not only house the final conferences but to find someone as neutral guardian,” Agnathaya explained gently.

“Ianto, they sent Ianto,” Jack said horrified.

“He’d only worked for Torchwood for six months, he was already being trained though both by George as an Archivist and by the Psychics,” Archie said with disapproval.

“But what if something happened to him?  He could have died in the Battle?” Jack protested.

“That was why a psychic was chosen.  Not just to test the sincerity of the parties but because they had the means to preserve the treaty beyond death.

“In the event of Ianto’s demise, he transmits the whole treaty into the mind of the person closest to him.  They aren’t aware of it any more than he is, but there is a signal they would respond to come should the knowledge be needed.  A signal known only to myself, the one who secured the knowledge in the mind and the heads of the two civilisations,” Aggie explained.

“If the knowledge is passed on in death why didn’t they kill him?” Jack said horrified.

“The closest psychically not physically you idjet,” Archie said irritably.  “That, when this whole fiasco started, means to you.  And now it’s you again.

“They knew that which is why the used a mind probe on him.  What they didn’t know was that Ianto didn’t just have his training.  He has another defence that they didn’t know about and we only realised yesterday.

“So instead they robbed him of his knowledge of Torchwood and set him up in a lonely existence allowing them to enact two plans to try again.  Did you ever wonder why they put him in Newport without a minder?” Archie asked.

“I assumed they knew I would kill anyone they forced Ianto into a relationship with,” Jack said angrily.  At a look from Archie he sighed and added, “Ianto may be introvert but he also gains strength from others.  Any relationship they gave him would have made him capable of resisting,” _even an abusive one._

That was one of the things that frightened Jack most about Ianto.  Love made the Welshman powerful, made him strong, made him terrifying but it also made him vulnerable.  He gave everything and allowed the person he loved to be the one capable of hurting him the most.

“They made him lonely and submissive so that his resistance would be low.  I checked the CCTV, Ianto had a routine and on the day of Wormstrom’s warning he was in a market.  They went to grab him but I think our mystery friend intervened,” Archie said.

“No that was me.  I also kept a close eye in his movements.  After your warning I knew there was no way I could get to the market in time but Gwen has friends in the police, they intercepted the bad guys for us.  We saw that Ianto was going home early and changed my route to get there first,” Jack told them.

“That was fortunate for everyone.  I think that they intended to use the mind probe again and if it triggered the same defence mechanism then they would have begun plan B.

“Plan B involves him being rescued by a tall, dark, handsome stranger probably with an American accent.  He would flirt, show an interest and they would allow sexual chemistry to brew.

“They would have a relationship, Ianto would fall in love with Plan B, they would open his psychic abilities probably using a similar method to the one we used last night and when they were certain the two were bonded...” Archie made a slashing movement across his throat.

“Ianto would know if it was a stooge,” Jack protested.

“Not if they used the same memory modification on tall, dark and treacherous and they did on Ianto.  They would then restore the stooge to himself or not and extract the information from his mind instead,” Archie finished bleakly.

“What’s this defence mechanism you keep going on about?” Jack asked.

“Ianto isn’t just a psychic receiver he’s a psychic projector.  Since you used the oil the whole of Glasgow has been in a haze of love.

“Crime was at a record low and the number of proposals, romantic encounters and people being asked on a date increased dramatically.  When you said you had made your feelings clear I don’t think you know quite how clear they were,” Archie told him raising an eyebrow.

“Ianto isn’t that powerful,” Jack said feeling stunned and exposed.

“Alone no but he had help remember,” Aggie said gently.

“There is an army base used for survival training in Merrivale in Dartmoor.  There was an incident there around the right time for them to give up the probing and decide to use the therapy device.

“Five men were found in a comatose state just outside the town which had been suffering nightmares.  UNIT identified them as mercenaries who specialised in inflicting pain.

“When they woke up in a military hospital they were all insane with pure terror.  Screaming about impossible horrors that sounded, amongst other things, like a description of the battle of Canary Wharf.

“The worst of them is reported to have written a seven hundred page confession of all his sins, asking for forgiveness before killing himself.  This is a man whose psych profile states that he was incapable of feeling any remorse?” Archie said baffled.

“Yes that’s Ianto.  It’s not enough that he’s seen or experienced terrible things, he also has to feel guilty that he survived them.”

 _That’s the only reason he stayed with Torchwood.  He was trying to be redeemed for the crime of survival_ , Jack thought sadly.

“I have a stealth helicopter landing in the campus grounds in half an hour.  It will take you to York where you will find a hotel room along with luggage, money and identification under the names of Captain James Daring and Mr Ian Wise,” Archie said rising from the dining room table.

“Why are you now so certain that York is safe?” Jack demanded.

“The city of York has been accorded protection and intergalactic sanctuary status by Torelin since the time of the Vikings.  The two races I spoke of and those that wish for Ianto’s knowledge all know of the Torelin,” Aggie told him.

Jack knew the Torelin to.  They were a standoffish race, one that wished to be left alone and saw no need to interfere themselves but they were powerful.  If one of these alien agents visited York though, the Torelin would deal with them.

It would be the forty-seventh century before humanity reached a level where they equalled the Torelin, but by then the older race was ready for friendship.  It was a good relationship that lasted even in Jack’s time.

Jack nodded and rose from the table.  He went out into the garden to collect Ianto and prepare him for the flight south.

 

 


	26. Chapter Twenty-six

For the first time since he found Ianto Jones again, Jack Harkness left the Welshman’s bed in the middle of the night.  He sat by the window letting the moonlight fill the hotel room.

The flight to York was uneventful and they booked into the hotel Archie had arranged with no incident.  Everything was waiting for them and the young man was satisfied with his quick explanation of why they were there.

York was now their sanctuary.  Sure if the aliens after Ianto had human agents they could still prove to be a problem, but mostly they were safe.

Ianto was safe.

That was quite the dilemma.  Ianto Jones was finally safe.  No one was coming to harm him.  They could stay here and be free.

Only it wouldn’t be quite his Ianto.  It would be the Newport Bookseller who would be safe; Torchwood’s Archivist would still be missing.

They should use this sanctuary to find out information about their enemy.  They needed to get that therapy device and use it to restore Ianto’s memory.

But then Ianto wouldn’t love him anymore.

The Bookseller loved him but there was no way the Archivist could.  His Archivist knew too much, knew what a bad person he was, knew how cold and hard he could be, how scared he was of commitment, how much he wandered.

Torchwood’s Archivist knew Jack at his darkest.  Sure he had forgiven him, but there was no way that Ianto Jones could love him.  Captain Jack Harkness of Torchwood was not a creature anyone could love.

The day he took the Bookseller from his home, Jack had given all that up.  He’d stopped being Torchwood’s Captain in all but name when Ianto was taken from him, but on that day he let Torchwood go too, and he wasn’t sure he really intended to return.

Ianto Jones was what made Torchwood bearable.

Over a century of waiting for the Doctor, he hadn’t felt as alive as he had when lying beneath the Welshman with an unconscious pterodactyl beside them.

Finding out about Lisa had gutted him.  Worse though was the months of Ianto walking around like he was half dead himself.

He had felt so pleased with himself when Ianto came to him for physical comfort.  Proud of himself for being the one to make Ianto come alive again.

Jack hadn’t seen that the young man felt for him more than he should.  Ianto always blinded him and Jack never thought things though.

Love made Ianto vulnerable, and Billis Manger manipulated Jack into betraying the Welshman with a kiss in 1941.  Then after forgiveness and reconciliation following Abaddon’s demise, Jack had betrayed him again in running after the Doctor.

Jack had returned from the Year That Never Was for Ianto.  Sure Torchwood was fun but it was the Welshman that kept him sane, grounded and healed him.

Ianto had taken him back.  It had taken some work on his part, but it was worth all the effort to know that Ianto Jones was his again.

Jack had this sneaky suspicion, this nagging little dark thought, that he had only been taken back because Ianto had given up on love.  That when Jack went away he had told his heart no more, but Jack was allowed back in because his place in Ianto’s heart was already there.

While Jack tried his best and Ianto never made any demands, the Immortal knew there were a hundred ways that he had unwilling hurt the Welshman.  The Archivist forgave always, but his heart grew colder, he gave up on happiness a little more.

The Bookseller didn’t know the real Jack at all.  He had glimpses, but he didn’t know the depths he could go to in order to keep the planet safe.

Jack had kidnapped him, groped him, terrified him, saved him, seduced him and made love to him, so the Welshman had to have some clue about who the Immortal really was.  Ianto was trying to work around the missing chunks of his life but, was content to let Jack lead.

And the Bookseller loved him.  He didn’t know the real Jack the way the Archivist did, but he _loved_ Jack.

And Jack loved him.  Yes, he loved the Archivist more than he had anyone else before, but this beautiful innocent he loved just as much.

They were both Ianto Jones.  They both possessed his heart and soul in a way he had allowed no other.  They both made the universe a better place to exist in, but he couldn’t have both.

If he stopped looking for the ones who did this, then he would never get his Archivist back.  He would never have the man who understood his darkness again.  The one who listened to him and knew his meaning, even when he could find no words, would be lost.

However going after the therapy device had its dangers.  The ones who had it wanted Ianto, wanted to torture his mind for a secret he hadn’t even known he possessed.

If they managed to overcome that, get the device and restore the Archivist, then the Bookseller would be lost.  He would regain their history, remember all the things Jack had done to hurt him, and he would lose that absolute love he had known in Glasgow.

As though he sensed Jack’s distress, Ianto Jones awoke.  He slipped out of the bed and walked across the floor, unconcerned that he was naked.

When he reached Jack his hand brushed the tears rolling down the older man’s face.  The Immortal suddenly grabbed Ianto and sat him on his lap as he wept.

The Welshman sang softly and stroked Jack as he cried for Ianto Jones.  It wasn’t just his hands he used; the Immortal could feel love reaching tentatively towards him, trying to heal.

Jack got up lifting Ianto with him.  He carried the Welshman back to the bed then grabbed a tie to secure his hands to the headboard.

He was needy and possessive.  He wanted Ianto to know he belonged to Jack, that couldn’t leave him, ever, not even through death.

Ianto Jones surrendered everything.  Let Jack know that he would never resist, that he belonged to Jack forever, no matter what.

When they had both come, Jack looked down at Ianto with clarity.  He loved his Archivist dearly but he couldn’t surrender this love.

He couldn’t risk losing both to get the man he fell in love with back.  He couldn’t hurt this precious young man anymore.

Jack may have been trying to own Ianto Jones tonight, but it was the Welshman who had gained possession of the Immortal’s soul.  The beauty before him was all he cared about and he was going to make his life perfection.

Tears dripped down onto Ianto as Jack mourned the side of the young man he would never see again.  Unable to comfort his lover with his arms, the Welshman sang again until the sobbing calmed.

Captain Jack Harkness sealed his betrayal of the Archivist with a kiss.  He made love to the only one who mattered anymore, the man who loved him, the man whose love he could no longer be happy without.

Afterwards he released Ianto from the headboard but not the tie.  He spooned the young man to him and held him possessively close.

Love radiated from Ianto into Jack, soothing him into his own sleep.  In the morning he felt no regret only excitement about staring his new life.


	27. Chapter Twenty-seven

Ianto Jones life had suddenly become perfect.

Within a week of arriving in York Jack had bought them a bookshop with a flat above.  They now lived together and ran the shop with an internet business.

They found several interesting markets in the York area, romantic spots and restaurants.  They went everywhere together, made love most mornings and evenings.

Jack helped with the bookselling business and the domestic duties.  He needed the occasional nudge to teach him, but he was wonderfully eager and keen.

After the months of fear, being on the run, setting down to a normal life was paradise.  To have it be Jack’s idea, to have the man he loved want to share it made Ianto’s life perfection.

But it was all wrong.

Oh he loved every minute of it.  Loved Jack with greater strength each day.  Yet something wasn’t right.

The feeling of wrongness began when he realised it was just him in his head.  Since his date with Jack in the butterfly farm, he had been so used to having a second presence, a second instinct guiding him.

Since their first night in York, since Jack had wept as he made love to Ianto, that voice/instinct was silent.  He had just been so happy it took the Welshman ten days to realise it.

It took him another two weeks to finally accept that there was something not right about Jack too.  Yes he was perfect in every way, he flirted with customers just enough to be convincing and he was making a great effort to please Ianto, but he wasn’t right.

That’s because this isn’t who Jack is.

The thought was so startling that Ianto had immediately asked himself, _are you there?_   But there was no answer, because he had been the one to think that treacherous thought.

Ianto studied Jack for two more days to confirm this conclusion and realised what was wrong.

_He’s given up on getting the person I was before back.  That’s why that part of me is silent; he knows that, he’s given up on returning._

_Jack’s changed himself for me._

Ianto wanted to dismiss this thought, but he couldn’t.  Every smile, look, word, touch on Jack’s part was perfect for him but it wasn’t quite the Jack he fell in love with, the Jack who loved who he had been.

The Welshman felt it best to ignore the confusion of his own duality and focus on why Jack had decided not to bring back the person he loved. 

It’s because he’s afraid.

Jack didn’t want to lose him.  Not just physically lose him to the dangers of the ones who had been after him.  He’s afraid that he will lose the love Ianto felt for Jack.

_My lost self knows Jack better than I.  He said there was a darker side to him that I haven’t seen.  He thinks my lost self won’t love him the way my current self does._

_But he does, I mean I do.  That’s why he’s staying silent in my mind.  This is what he wants a life and love with Jack.  He knew Jack couldn’t give that to him, so he’s letting me have paradise._

_He_ is _me though.  I might not remember the bad times and I might have a few different personality quirks, but I am him._

_I could have what I always wanted, an interesting business and a person to love who loves me.  We could make each other so happy._

_All we would have to do is live a lie.  I am incomplete and Jack has made himself less than he is to please me.  He is trying to pretend, but we both know this isn’t real._

_Its love he fears losing the most.  I need to prove to him that he has it absolutely from both of us._

As Ianto realised the perfect way to do it, he knew his lost self was awake again.  No more than that, _he_ was still his lost self and always had been.

His plan would take time, required opportunities and careful organising.  _Of course,_ Ianto thought slightly smugly, _one of the things Jack loves me for is my patience and ability to surprise._

 


	28. Chapter Twenty-eight

The deviousness of Ianto Jones’ plan meant that the romantic dinner was actually something Jack organised.  Ianto was beginning to suspect that the lack of dates his past self had been taken on was now being reconciled.

Instead of allowing dinner to heat them up so that they would head straight for the bedroom, Ianto slowed things down.  He asked Jack to dance with him in the living room and loved every second of closeness.

After the dance though Ianto led him to the sofa.  He could see his seriousness leading to the beginnings of fear in Jack’s eyes and reached out with his love to calm him.

It only struck him then how often he did that.  Ianto wondered if it was something unique he brought to the relationship, which was why Jack had suddenly become so obsessed with being loved by him.

Looking again into those fearful eyes, Ianto couldn’t bring himself to say it.  Couldn’t tell Jack that their relationship, while the most wonderful in the world, was wrong.

Yet he did know a way to show him.  Letting instinct guide him Ianto closed his eyes and rested his forehead against Jack’s.

Jack was reassured a little by the love Ianto sent his way but he could tell something was about to change.  As the Welshman closed his eyes and touched his forehead the Immortal knew he had to let the young man do this, so he too closed his eyes.

The older man suddenly felt that he was being jerked forward.  He now stood before a tree.

It was a metaphorical tree he knew because it was Ianto Jones.  The roots were Ianto’s experience and learning, his memories both factual and emotional.

They combined with flesh and feeling at the trunk and out of that grew the branches, his actions and thoughts.  The air the leaves breathed was Ianto’s interactions with the universe.

Jack felt himself being pulled towards the roots.  As he passed though the soil Jack realised that that too was the universe.  The branches were Ianto effect on the world and here below was the world’s effect on him.

Ianto’s memories and experiences spread far like white roots.  Each tendril had to represent a fragment of each incident that made Ianto who he was, the larger the tendril, the more important to his being. 

Jack touched a small one and suddenly knew how to calculate the ratio of a circumference in relation to its diameter.  There were many small tendrils, trivia known by a man with almost perfect recall.

Yet Jack could see immediately see that all was not well.  There were great voids amid the roots, massive ones.

He couldn’t see them but they left an impression on the universe.  They were Ianto’s lost memories.

Bridging the gaps between the shadows were sickly dark tendrils.  Jack couldn’t bring himself to be near them knowing what they were, the effects of the therapy device, memories rammed into Ianto to make him the Bookseller.

There were also livid raw tendrils and bright new ones.  The new ones grew from a combination of the white roots and black invaders, they must be the Bookseller’s own memories.  The raw tendrils were parts of his Archivist breaking through from the void.

Curiosity made Jack want to know the full effect these stands were having on Ianto.  He reached out for the nearest entangled white root.

It was Ianto’s understanding of humanity but there were voids, terrible voids.  They were too big to be just Ianto’s experiences at Torchwood.

There was nothing in them of the terrible things humanity could do, beyond the ostracising and bullying the black tendrils told him ended his relationship with Lisa.  The total shock of being kidnapped by Jack suddenly hit the Immortal with full force; it was something they had left his lover incapable of understanding.

He backed away and suddenly felt himself caught in a strange current.  He was in a void of memories but he could feel the ghost of what they represented.

They were pulling him away from the awfulness of other people towards what made it all worth it.  The reason to go on, the reason to suffer because this one thing made it all bearable.

Jack wanted to weep as he found himself in the largest void of all.  The thing that made Ianto Jones’ life better, made him want to live, gave him the strength to do what he had to was gone, but not completely.

There was a raw tendril.  One that had broken through the blocks of the therapy device.  It was entwined with a new tendril and they pulsed together.

Jack needed the hope.  He needed to know what it was that Ianto lived for.  Wanted to know what it was that healed all the damage of the universe.

The Immortal reached for the secret of the greatest power in the universe and felt loved.

It was him, Captain Jack Harkness, he was the core of Ianto Jones’ heart.  He felt the love he had experienced in Glasgow throbbing through those entwined tendrils.

Then he realised the roots in his hands were not pulsing alone.  He was standing amid the void of memories but he could feel them like a faint heartbeat.

The good, the bad, the brilliance and the terribleness of all the things Jack had been with Ianto they all lead to the void and they all vibrated with love.  The Immortal had thought the Bookseller’s feelings in Glasgow overwhelming, but they were a minor infatuation compared to those of the Archivist who knew him, understood him.

Jack jerked back to reality in shock and disbelief.  That was only an echo of what was lost.  He could never hope to match feelings like that.

He was brought back to reality by movement close by.  He looked at Ianto and realised the young man was holding a small box.

“I cannot ask you to marry me because I’m incomplete.  But I love you with the whole of my being, all I am now and all that I was.”

The words held little meaning to Jack as the box was opened to reveal a gold ring.  It was a wild cat curled around in a circle.

Jack fancied it was a panther.  He had often called his Archivist that when the Welshman let loose his wild side.

He didn’t even realise he had thrust out his hand until he felt the cool metal sliding down his ring finger.  It didn’t just fit him perfectly, it belonged there.

Ianto kissed Jack gently and helped him to his feet.  They shared another dance before the Welshman led him to the bedroom.

Jack was tenderly stripped of his clothes and bathed with a sponge and warm scented water.  He was laid on the bed, restrained and coaxed into orgasm three times by his lover.

With each caress, each kiss, each climax the barriers in Jack’s mind lowered and he welcomed in Ianto’s love.  The Welshman looked after him, took care of him and protected him in a way Jack had forgotten he needed.

Ianto knew exactly what was requited, from lips on his cock to a little light spanking, all were what Jack wanted, needed, and were given and received with love.  All this from an incomplete Ianto.

When the Welshman judged Jack to be near total relaxation and exhaustion, he knew it was time for one final release.  He released the older man from his restraints and rolled him on his side.

Ianto pushed his own aching cock carefully into Jack.  With each thrust he poured more love and he held the older man tight and stroked him.

They climaxed together and Ianto felt exhausted.  He knew he should withdraw from Jack’s body but he didn’t have the strength.

He moved his arm up to curl protectively around his lover and fell asleep.  He had poured too much of himself into Jack.

Ianto Jones’ Torchwood One Psychic Training warned against touching another with strong emotion, especially love.  Not for any moral reason, though that was why Ianto rarely touched his gifts, but because of the dangers of forming permanent links.

The Archivist had only touched Jack with his feelings a few times, times when Jack most needed to feel how loved he was.  Ianto was cautious against overuse, the potential addiction, and knew Jack had barriers of his own.

Tonight Jack Harkness didn’t just lower the barriers in his mind to let Ianto in.  He pushed his own feelings into the space where Ianto’s love flowed from and rushed to fill it with his own.

He met with no resistance.  The Bookseller may have had no understanding of his psychic gifts, but there was enough of the Archivist left to know how to block an invader.

Jack though wasn’t an invader.  Both Ianto’s didn’t just pour their love into Jack, they welcomed him inside their sanctuary.

Their passion for each other entwined in both minds until it became impossible to tell one man’s feelings for the other’s.  As Jack too slipped into sleep both minds changed to accommodate the presence of the other.

 


	29. Chapter Twenty-nine

All night the two men shared dreams.  Some were wonderful and some were terrifying.  Marvellous sights were experienced with new joy, and fears weakened by the other’s presence.

In the last dream they were in a room that seemed to be a combination of an underground office full of strange objects and Ianto’s Newport Bookshop.  Not of course that either man was really paying much attention to their surroundings.

Jack did like the fact that the desk was the perfect height to bend over while Ianto thrust into him from behind.  Of course he loved the feel of his lover above him more.

Both men woke in the moments before climax unable to stop.  They felt disorientated and wonderful as they lay panting together.

Ianto withdrew from Jack feeling a little embarrassed.  He hadn’t meant to stay inside his lover all night, let alone wake him by having sex.

Jack though radiated nothing but pure pleasure.  As soon as Ianto slipped away he turned to grab hold of him and keep him close.

Neither man mentioned how much they could feel the presence of the other.  They just pressed tight against each other and revelled in sensation.

Both felt disappointed when the sounds of a new day intruded.  That didn’t stop the mutual notion of a shared shower where they could explore the feel of water on each other.

They washed each other tenderly, not trying to arouse.  It felt more like their skin was new and they couldn’t stop touching.

Ianto took ten minutes to realise that Jack had been shampooing his hair for the past twenty.  He felt embarrassed, then shy, then slightly shocked as he realised that he was turning Jack on.

He thought his insecurities had to be so tedious to Jack.  Now he realised they were worse because his shyness was giving Jack a hard on.

Jack decided to show Ianto just how much he loved overcoming the Welshman’s shyness.  Yet afterwards Jack seemed a little put out that Ianto didn’t find him arousing in the same way.

The Welshman could tell Jack was thinking about spending all day in the nude to get a reaction and sent a glare his way.  That too produced a flush of lust but the older man restrained himself and pouting, got dressed.

They went out shortly afterwards to get some more computer equipment.  However while the purchase was straight forward, both men were shocked by how the world felt different.

With their stuff safely home, both men felt a longing to be outside.  They wanted to know the world the way their lover knew it.

By mutual decision they concluded that, while they could put the barriers up again, if something happened to break those barriers, then they would find the world overwhelming.  Better to get used to it now.

So they decided to take the rest of the day off to enjoy the new world.  It took a week longer than they anticipated, and covered the whole of York, before guilt made them focus again on the task of finding the people who had stolen Ianto’s memories.

Ianto tried to help Jack with setting up the equipment but found it increasingly frustrating.  He had moments were everything went together correctly and then found himself wondering what on earth he was doing.

Jack took over the task and realised this was going to take a while.  The Immortal had the skills to complete the set up but the research was something long and tedious that Ianto normally did.

The Welshman decided to get out of Jack’s hair and began to clean the shop and flat.  He became a cheerful presence of concentration in the back of Jack’s mind.

_It’s no wonder he’s so good in bed.  The amount of attention he’s giving such mundane tasks.  Having all that attention turned on me..._

He felt Ianto’s concentration lapse and realised that his thoughts had turned amorous when he was supposed to be working.  Jack’s quick focus on his work sent a tingle of amusement from his Welsh lover.

Ianto realised that this task was something Jack was not finding easy.  While he cleaned the house, he made sure he was aware of the older man’s state of mind.

He knew when Jack needed company and brought coffee.  When he grew hungry he brought food.  Over the days while Jack searched, Ianto gave shoulder massages, took his lover out for a walk and after a particularly frustrating hour, gave him a mind blowing blow job.

It was after this last that Jack suddenly looked at him in concern.  Ianto knew his ministrations had been pleasurably received, so he couldn’t understand what he’d done wrong.

“I feel like I’m using you,” Jack said.

“What?” Ianto stated genuinely surprised.

“You give me so much, all I seem to do is take from you,” Jack answered unhappily.

“I like looking after you,” Ianto told him.

“But I don’t seem to give you very much in return,” the older man said looking briefly at the Welshman’s unattended hard on.

At this Ianto laughed out loud.  It was such a wonderful sound that Jack couldn’t tell if he should feel happy to hear it, or awful because the universes joke seemed to be on him.

Before he could make up his mind though, Ianto leapt up and began to kiss him.  It was impossible to feel anything but bliss when the Welshman radiated such affection.

“We may be very different people Jack but we both want the same thing.  It’s just that because we are different, our approach to getting what we need is different and the actual shape of what we need is different.

“I like looking after people.  It’s easy to me.  Feeling compassion, altruism, care, I don’t always let it show, but they do come easy.

“It’s just that I’m also a little shy and reserved.  I can get on with people but I find it difficult to let them in.  I like to listen but I’m not much of a talker.

“I want someone who understands, who wants to know me despite my little quirks.  Someone I can be the person I hide from the world with.

“You of course seem like my opposite.  You’re loud and confident and physical.  Giving pleasure with your body is easy to you because you aren’t inhibited like I am.

“All that noise to protect your heart from the world.  So that people cannot get to you to hurt you but...” Ianto trailed off not really sure what to say next.

“You have my heart Ianto Jones, poor battered thing that it is.  With you I am the person no one else sees, so few want to see,” Jack said sadly.

“You may not say much Ianto but it always seems to be the right thing.  You don’t always need words.

“When you told me you knew how to touch and be touched by me, I’m not sure you realised...”

“That I wasn’t just talking about the way I opened up to let you inside me,” Ianto interrupted.  “That with each touch you were telling your lost lover how much you loved and missed him.  That I was unconsciously giving you his love and reassurance back.”

Jack just stared at him slightly stunned.

“You’re a talker Jack.  Like with most talkers your deepest feelings are those you find hardest to say.

“I’m inhibited; sexual prowess isn’t on my list of qualities either as a lover or in a lover.  Not that I don’t love it, I do, but it’s not in my natural comfort zone.

“Except with you.  The person I hide from the world knows how to speak with sex and you are a very receptive listener because you speak with sex to.”

“I still think you got a raw deal Ianto,” Jack said quietly.

He didn’t want to say it, but all Ianto’s little quirks were part of the initial turn on.  Unpeeling all those layers to get at the raw sexual being within was part of the thrill of the hunt when the Welshman joined Torchwood Cardiff.

Then Jack found out about Lisa.  After the initial betrayal and shock was over, he felt his own loss.

It wasn’t just the way Ianto walked around like he was already dead with no sparkle in his eyes.  It wasn’t just that in grief all those little quirks were gone. 

It was realising he had himself been seduced.  With coffee and a smile, with quite conversations late at night, with all those little quirks that Ianto didn’t even realise he found erotic.

 _Talking about erotic..._ Jack looked down at Ianto and suddenly felt very dense and self absorbed.

While they had been speaking Ianto had rested his head on Jack’s knees and was stroking his legs with one hand while the fingers of the other were laced with his lovers.

While Ianto was radiating love and reassurance, Jack could now also sense what he was not projecting.  Ianto was enjoying this, not seeing him suffer, but giving him the comfort he needed.

Jack looked in Ianto’s eyes and the Welshman became alert, waiting to know what it was that his lover wanted, needed.  The Immortal was stunned to realised there was no submissiveness in that anticipation.

There was determination and strength of will blended with love.  He wanted to heal Jack no matter what was asked of him, and that frightened the Immortal because it made him feel fragile in comparison.

Ianto stood and motioned for his lover to rise.  He retook Jack’s hand and led him away to teach his lover about his own inner strengths.


	30. Chapter Thirty

BANG!

“Armed Police!”

The noise and the cry woke Jack and Ianto.  They looked at each other in confusion not knowing what was happening.

Then they realised their mistake.  They thought themselves safe because the aliens couldn’t get to them.  They forgot that they tended to use subtly and they really wanted what Ianto knew.

“I love you,” both men said and kissed each other before the bedroom door was forced open.

Ianto clung to Jack but he was suddenly wrenched away by someone behind him.

“Ianto!”

“Jack!”

“Ianto!”

Both men reached out trying to grab the other.  Ianto struggled against the men holding him as others came and grabbed Jack.

Suddenly Ianto was hit from behind.  Pain shot through him and the world began to spin slightly but he could still hear Jack.

“Why the hell did you do that?” a gruff voice demanded. “He’s the one we’re here to rescue.”

“But he was struggling sir,” one of the men behind him whined.

“Did you not read your handbook of cases of abduction?  Were you asleep at the briefing?  This man’s been in that sicko’s custody for months he’s probably got bloody Stockholm Syndrome,” the gruff man said bending down to look in Ianto’s eyes.

“You, get some clothes for the suspect and get him down the station.  You get Mr Jones dressed and take him to the hospital to be looked at.  I’ll get the psychologist to meet you there.  Don’t let him out of your sight until I get there.

“Now his bloody wife’s going to add the fact that you clocked him to her list of complaints,” the gruff man said before storming out of the room after Jack.

 _Wife?_ Ianto wondered confused but too disorientated to explore that thought further.

He was too stunned to struggle anymore.  He was led to the wardrobe and made to dress.  The irony that the man who hit him was the gentler of the two policemen with him was not lost on Ianto.

On the way to the hospital, in the back of a squad car, Ianto managed clear his head enough to learn that the one who hit him was PC Shaw. The one who was homophobic, he had all the verbal qualifications to be homophobic, was PC Ambler.

His eyes were examined and he was taken up to be x-rayed before being taken down to a private room that wasn’t in A & E.  Shaw and Ambler stayed with him most of the time.

The two police constables talked.  Ambler thought this whole situation was unfair and seemed to think Ianto deserved everything he got.  The Welshman couldn’t help agreeing because what he’d got was Jack, exactly what he wanted right now.

He could still feel his lover in his mind but the connection was buzzy.  The pounding of his head was making it difficult to focus.

It took him a while to realise that he was now being examined by the doctor.  There was also another man there looking through a pile of notes.

“Now if you just take your trousers down we can examine you and take samples,” the doctor was saying.

“What?” Ianto asked.

“Come on, come on we haven’t got all day,” he answered and Ianto felt obliged to do as he was told.

“What are you doing?” Ianto asked not liking where the doctor appeared to be about to probe.  PC Ambler smirking while looking with an appreciative eye was not helping things.

“This is a rape kit, I’m taking samples as evidence,” the doctor replied clinically.

“I wasn’t raped,” Ianto protested.

“Then why did you sign the consent form?” the police psychologist asked.

“What?” the Welshman knew he’s signed nothing and certainly not a consent form to have samples taken and used against Jack.

“He has a mild concussion but nothing serious,” the doctor said as the psychologist looked distressed.

“Thomas you do know that this isn’t a simple case of abduction and months of forced imprisonment resulting in Stockholm Syndrome?” the psychologist asked.

“I know that his wife intends to sue the Met and the Super doesn’t want her to turn her attention to you lot,” the doctor replied.

“I’m not married,” Ianto said to which the psychologist gave Thomas a “see” look.

“So Steve what happened?” the doctor asked.

 _Yes what happened?_ Ianto thought wanting to know what story their enemies concocted.

“The report says that Jones met Harkness on his wedding day.  They wanted to escape her controlling relatives so they got married in a registry office and grabbed Harkness off the street as one of the witnesses.

“After that Harkness began to stalk Jones.  His wife didn’t notice at first then every time they went out that sicko was there.

“It nearly broke up their marriage, Harkness got a job at the same place as Jones and began to harass him there and in the end got Jones fired.

“After that Jones had a nervous breakdown.  He went to a retreat to try and get help but Harkness hounded him there too so he ran away.

“The wife filed for harassment against Harkness, tried to get an injunction order taken out against him and kicked up a fuss when he disappeared.

“The met investigated Harkness then thinking he’d kidnapped Jones, but Jones emptied his accounts and bought himself a place in Wales so they decided that he was missing voluntarily.

“They asked the Welsh police to investigate but...” Steve shrugged and the others nodded in understanding while Ianto felt insulted.

“They didn’t tell his wife were he was and she’s been looking for him ever since.  Harkness disappeared off their radar after a couple of months, evidently he found Jones a few months ago and abducted him.”

The doctor shook his head in disgust.  Even Ambler looked sympathetic at him.  The psychologists while sympathetic also seemed a little embarrassed about discussing the case in front of the victim.

_It’s all a lie.  I’m not married.  Jack wouldn’t stalk me like that; he was so gentle with me.  He didn’t take advantage when he could have.  It’s all a lie._

Before Ianto could say anything though the door burst open and a woman came in followed by the gruff policeman.  Slim, dark skinned and beautiful, she looked like Lisa.

He stared at her stunned as she kicked up a fuss about the fact that he wasn’t wearing his trousers because of their probing.  He hastily covered himself with a hand from the sympathetic Shaw.

She wasn’t Lisa he was sure of it and why did they keep calling her Mrs. Jones?  Ianto’s memories of the girl he loved were vague but he remembered the grief when Jack told him she was dead.

Her touch, her smile felt alien to him.  She was a stranger and all of Ianto’s protests were met with cries demanding to know what that monster Harkness had done to her husband.

Ianto felt a sharp pain in his arm then slightly sick, weak and more disorientated.  He looked up at a pair of dark skinned men who asked the Welshman if he remembered them, they were Lisa’s brothers.

They’re not her brothers.  I cannot remember if Lisa had siblings or not, but it’s obvious that they aren’t related.  They don’t have a single physical characteristic in common, different noses, different eyes, different ears, different everything.

Ianto found himself unable to protest anymore and realised he’d been drugged under the other’s noses.  He couldn’t follow what was going on but suddenly he was being carried out by the two fake brothers and bundled into a car.

 _They’ve won.  They’ve got me.  I’m so sorry Jack_ , Ianto thought as his head felt worse and he blacked out.


	31. Chapter Thirty-one

Ianto woke in bed with someone warm lying beside him.  For a few moments he allowed himself the fantasy that the police raid had all been a dream.

Only the person next to him didn’t have Jack’s shape or weight.  They were wearing satin and lace against his bare chest, his bare everything.

Ianto jolted away from the person next to him.

“It’s alright, it’s alright,” she said making soothing, calming motions.

It was the fake Lisa from the hospital.  Instinctively he covered himself up.  That felt bizarre after enjoying being freely naked with Jack.

“I’m sorry I didn’t think.  I was just so glad to have you home.  I knew he raped you, I should have known you’d be skittish, I’m sorry” she said almost to herself.

“He didn’t rape me,” Ianto said quietly.

“Of course he did you just have Stockholm Syndrome that’s why you think you care about him but you don’t.  You’re straight Ianto, you’ve always been straight, you don’t like men that way,” she insisted fiercely.

 _Yes I do, I love Jack,_ Ianto thought.  He reached into his mind to the place where he and Jack were entwined.

He could feel Jack’s love there but not Jack himself.  The Welshman felt numb and realised he sense of being in the world was gone.

Ianto wasn’t quite sure how that could happen but he knew the people she worked for had done it.  Jack had warned him that they were trying to weaken him and he wasn’t going to let them.

The Welshman reached again towards where Jack’s love lived inside him and touched it; felt its warmth spread though him as though Jack were the one next to him.  Faintly as he touched that love he could feel a flare of anger, _Jack._

Suddenly she touched him on the arm.  Ianto jerked away again.  He looked into her eyes and saw concern and anger.

“Well I hope they throw the book at him for all he did to us.  Everything he put you though.  We’re going to start your counselling today and you’ll be my Ianto again,” she said with false brightness.

“Where’s my ring?” Ianto asked.  He had looked down at his hands not wanting to look at the stooge and noticed his dragon ring was gone.

“It’s here,” she said going to the dressing table and pulling out a gold ring.

As she moved away Ianto took in his surroundings for the first time.  This was his and Lisa’s flat in London.

It was perfect in every detail, even down to the scuff marks on the furniture and the deliberate coffee ring Lisa had made the last time they had been there together.  She was always doing that to tease him, because she loved watching him trying and failing to resist scrubbing them away.

This mark though filled him suddenly with sorrow.  Ianto knew that this was the coffee ring Lisa had made on the day she died.  He had left it there because he couldn’t bear to obliterate her last childish tease, it had felt too much like he was obliterating her.

He looked at this fake Lisa and felt nothing.  A coffee mark meant more to him that this pretender.

She sat beside him and held out a plain gold ring.  There were no markings on it at all and that made him smile.  That was proof that this was not his Lisa.

His Lisa had had two wedding rings that belonged to her grandparents.  He had asked her about it when he saw them amongst her rings when they moved in together.

She said the man’s ring was intended to be her husband’s and the woman’s for her son’s wife.  Then she laughed and reassured him she was not ready to make use of either ring yet.

Inside both rings there was engraved ‘ _Totus Meus Diligo_ ’, _All My Love_ in Latin.  They had cost Lisa’s grandfather a fortune but they had lived long happily together for many years.

Ianto looked at the plain fake ring and wondered what happened to the real ones.  He hoped he looked after them properly for Lisa.

“That’s not my ring and you are not my wife.  I want my dragon ring back, the one Jack gave me.  I’m not going to play your sick games,” Ianto told her quietly.

She gave an angry cry and hit him.  He was knocked from the bed in a tangle of bed covers. He sat up on the floor and looked at her.

He could feel a pain in his lip and his hand went to it.  He could taste blood before he saw it on his fingers.

“You really don’t understand people do you,” Ianto said quietly.  “You think because I’m quiet and shy I let people dominate and bully me, in fact you made me think people dominated and bullied me.

“You think because Jack knows anger and violence that he would beat me into submission.  You think because Jack’s all about sex that he wouldn’t resist taking me the first opportunity her got.

“Well I am damn irresistible and I made him hard for me so many times, but he never once used me, never once hit me.

“He waited for me to be ready for him and then he hesitated.  I practically had to jump him before he accepted that I wanted him naked and inside me.

“Jack and the real Lisa have one thing in common.  They know love and love is patient.  Oh it can be demanding at times on both sides but the rewards are always mutual happiness.

“As for me not liking men before, if you had been the real Lisa you would know that I’ve never cared about the packaging.  In fact beauty’s always made me shy.

“It’s the heart and soul within that sets me on fire.  Yours is less attractive to me than a sewage system.  I hope your inadequate profilers know enough about me to know how much I loathe those,” Ianto finished looking at her balefully.

The Welshman marvelled that he didn’t feel at all cruel.  Even though her eyes welled up with tears and she shook her head in disbelief he felt no sympathy for her.

He stood quietly and decided if he wanted clothes he had to get them himself.  He found everything where he expected it to be.  For a moment Ianto wonder how long they had been watching him to know these details before remembering that he still put his clothes in the same places in his flat with Jack.

After dressing he began to look though the boxes on the dressing table looking for his ring.  He ignored Lisa despite knowing it was probably dangerous but with the security of knowing they needed him alive.

Ianto then checked to en-suite bathroom before heading to the bedroom door.  On the other side was not his lounge but a huge room dominated by TV’s showing security camera footage of the inside of the bedroom.

There were also lots of people.  Several couples in suites like the ones that had chased him and Jack though the art gallery so long ago.  There were also beings that looked humanoid but had bluish skin and triangular scale like ridges around the eyebrows and down their arms.

“I told you that would never work,” said the only human standing alone in the whole room.

Ianto recognised him but he had no idea where from.  It was not a friendly recognition; his second instinct was ringing the alarm bells a little too late.

“I concur we will have to start again, remove all trace of Harkness’ influence before we can use emotional attachment,” the fake Lisa said from behind him.  “I’m not sure the probe will work any more successfully on him now than it did last time.”

“We need that information,” one of the aliens hissed.  “We will try anyway.”

“I think I know a way to break him but I have to make some preparations first,” the collaborator said eying Ianto coldly.

“Very well but we will begin the preliminary testing and probing,” the alien replied.

“Of course,” the human answered and retreated away.

Fear filled Ianto as he was grabbed from behind.  He struggled as they strapped him down in a chair.  He didn’t know what the equipment around him was, but he knew it caused pain.

Despite his earlier certainties Ianto Jones felt sure he was going to die.  He let his mind fill with all those memories of Jack.

He really wished he had his dragon ring back as they lowered the first device towards him.


	32. Chapter Thirty-two

After a day of shouting to be allowed out, Captain Jack Harkness realised that they were going to ignore him until he was quiet.  He refused to say anything until he was allowed to make a phone call.

He was seething quietly as they led him into a room that belonged to an inspector.  He didn’t care that the man stayed to listen, in fact Jack had insisted and put the call on speakerphone.

“Hello?” came Gwen’s uncertain voice.

“Gwen it’s me.”

“Jack!  What the hell’s going on?  You get to Yorkshire and after one phone call it’s suddenly like you entered the Bermuda Triangle,” she said angrily.

“They’ve got Ianto.  Apparently his _wife_ came to collect him and I’m currently in Police custody for his kidnapping,” Jack said loudly.

“What wife?  We’re beginning a trace now and UNIT are on their way to collect you.  Why do they think you kidnapped him?  Archie made sure you were both registered with them as being in the witness protection program,” she stated confused.

“The wife’s Lisa,” Jack said.

“But she’s dead,” Gwen protested and Jack was too concerned to take satisfaction in the shocked look on the inspector’s face.

“Listen Ianto was hurt when the police took us so they probably took him to the hospital.  Check the CCTV of all hospitals in our area, try and get an ID on this woman it may help us find her.  Ianto should still be wearing the tracker I gave him but I need to be close to pick up the trace,” Jack said.

“Martha and Captain Danvers organised a standby group just outside York.  You might have gone off the radar but that doesn’t mean we stopped caring where you are.  They’re on their way to you now and will pick you up from the roof of Police Headquarters,” Gwen said her voice equalling Jack’s in anger.

“I’ve also arranged for an APB to be put out on Ianto and those with him.  I am also sending orders for your release,” she said and they could hear her tapping away at her computer.

“Gwen have the non-classified Bookseller file sent over to the Police Department here they might be able to help,” the Immortal said in a voice that said he very much doubted it.

Behind him a police officer entered trying to catch the inspector’s eye.  The commanding officer waived his subordinate into silence.

“I’ll make sure that Lisa’s death certificate and files classifying you as a protected witness are on the top.  Jack what they will do with him?” she added worried.

The Inspector’s compute pinged and the file immediately opened.  He skimmed thought it and began to look more than a little sick.

Jack looked straight in the eye of the inspector as he answered, “They will physically and mentally torture him until he tells them what they want.  They cannot let him die until they know but what state he will be in if we don’t get to him before then…” he didn’t want to even think about the end of that sentence.

“Gwen, let Archie know what’s happened.  He might not be able to help but he can prepare.  If they get what they want it could cause a war the likes of which the planet cannot conceive.”

Jack stood up and thrust his hands out to be released and the inspector waved at the waiting sergeant to him to do so.

“We’ll get him back Jack,” Gwen reassured him.

“Call you back in a minute,” Jack said and hung up.

He walked out of the inspector’s office without looking back at him and collected his things.  Jack immediately began to dial Gwen with his mobile and headed for the stairs.

“Have you been able to expand on the searches I was doing?”

“Yes but it’s the same as you found, deceptions, red herrings and more leads,” she said frustrated.

“What about this Wormstom that Archie told us about?”

“Well Martha found something but I don’t think it’s it,” Gwen replied doubtfully.

“Why not?”

“Because this Wormstrom isn’t a person it’s a theoretical computer programme.  No one seems to be very clear about what it does but they are all certain that it’s big and powerful but just a concept, it was never actually made and run,” the Welshwoman replied.

“Why would Martha think this computer programme is the Wormstrom we are interested in?”

“Because Ianto was its creator’s muse.  All the geeks that know about Wormstrom know that.  It’s a computer programmer’s fairytale about unrequited love,” Gwen said cynically.

Jack could hear the sound of a chopper and looked up to see the UNIT helicopter approaching.

“Got to go my ride’s here,” Jack said.

“But...” Gwen’s protests were cut off as the Captain disconnected the call.

Over the sound of the nearing helicopter he could not hear his phone ringing.  He waited for it to land and got aboard before they had even finished the pleasantries.

They took off and Jack checked his wrist strap to find out where the tracker in Ianto’s wristband would take him.  He began to give instructions before he realised the chopper had already turned.

He barely had time to turn himself before the pain of a stun gun rippled through him.

 _At least I’ll be near Ianto soon_ , he thought before the darkness took him.

 


	33. Chapter Thirty-three

The first thing Ianto saw as he was flung into his cell was Jack.  His whole body hurt and he had to be carried in.

Ianto cried out as he hit the floor and couldn’t react before the door clanked shut behind him.  He crawled over to his lover and felt relief that he still breathed.

He had nothing to lose in using the last of his strength to lie down beside Jack.  It was more of a sprawl across him, before unconsciousness grabbed him.

When he woke Jack was holding him close and crying.  His body still ached but he could feel Jack stronger in his mind and the pain stopped mattering.

As soon as Jack realised he was awake he fetched some water.  Ianto drank greedily but wanted to be in those arms more.

“I’m sorry they tricked me,” Jack said tears in his eyes.

“I don’t care,” Ianto replied and he meant it.  Rescue would have been nice but right then having Jack was so much better.

“They will try to use me against you.  They will use me to make you give the secret up,” Jack insisted.

“I don’t know what this secret is.  I don’t know how to access it so how can they use you against me?” Ianto asked weakly.

“They’re going to hurt me to get to you.  Promise me you won’t let them use me.  What you are hiding is so important, more important than my life,” Jack insisted.

“But I don’t know how I’m resisting.  So far all they’ve done is medical scans and initial probes to see how I have changed from when they last had me.  They hurt so much, tearing in me, I don’t know how I resist,” Ianto said tears forming in his eyes.  He didn’t want to be weak but he just felt so confused and in pain.

Jack pulled him closer, his arms trying to soothe.  Ianto could feel his indecision.  Part of Jack knew how important this secret was and part of him wanted no one to hurt Ianto.

Ianto pulled up closer to Jack and whispered, “He isn’t afraid.”

“Who?”

“The _me_ I don’t remember.  He doesn’t think they’ll get that they want,” Ianto replied truthfully, he could feel his second instinct adding his own comfort to Jack’s.

“And you?”

“I hurt,” Ianto answered truthfully.

Jack turned his head and kissed him.  Warmth flowed through Ianto, comforting, healing.  Too much of the Welshman and he passed out again.

When Ianto woke again he was still being held close by Jack.  His body no longer ached but he felt a terrible anticipation.

“Why haven’t they come for me?” he asked quietly.

“Perhaps their readings are giving them a bit of trouble,” Jack said trying to sound casual.

“I'm not normal am I,” Ianto said faintly, feeling Jack’s attempts to reassure him through the numbness where they were blocking his abilities.

“I’d love you no matter what you are,” Jack answered and bent down for a kiss.

They allowed themselves to share that moment of passion knowing that any minute now they would be divided again.  Yet when they parted Jack sighed understanding the look in Ianto’s eyes.

“Archie told me you were unique.  You were trained to keep secrets but you were also trained to use your awareness.

“The secret they are after was hidden for you, you’ve never known about it.  Whether the one who placed it there used your own training to blend it in your mind or you added your own layers of protection after I don’t know.

“I do know that your intuitions were much more powerful when the secret was hidden.  When you lost Lisa you rejected them, stopped being able to use them.

“Both times that I met you, you had no abilities at all.  Both times they have grown.  The link we share now is much more powerful than anything we had before...”

“And it’s throwing off their previous readings,” Ianto finished and Jack nodded silently.

“I think we’re being given false hope,” Ianto said quietly after a while.  Jack looked at him questioningly.

“They tried to make me believe I was married to Lisa.  That you harassed and abused me; that this was Stockholm syndrome.

“They said they couldn’t use emotional attachment without making me what I was after the first time.  If they cannot break me they will have to destroy our bond, they will kill you,” Ianto said sadly.

“I'm difficult to kill and they will have to be very sure hurting me has no effect on you,” Jack said fiercely and Ianto believed him completely.

“There’s a man amongst them.  I recognise him but I don’t know who he is.  He’s the one that brought you here.  He’s working with them and he’s dangerous,” Ianto said quietly.

“I haven’t seen our hosts, what do they look like?”

“Blue with ridges like scales on their eyebrows and arms,” Ianto repeated as though that was a normal description to give.

“Dolerigs.  I think I know what secrets you hold,” Jack said looking suddenly very serious.

Again Ianto had the sense that Jack wanted to tell him that the secrets should be protected at all costs.  Yet again the older man remained silent because he cared more for his lover than anything else in the universe.

The clanging of the door told Ianto it was now time.  He pushed into Jack kissing him, trying to tell him that he loved, wanting to feel his feelings returned.

They were pulled apart roughly.  There was a look of despair in Jack’s eyes as they were dragged together out of the cell.

The equipment that held so much pain sent a shiver of fear through Ianto.  He could not surrender now though, not when Jack needed him to be strong, especially as the older man couldn’t ask him to be.

Ianto took a breath and calmed his mind as they strapped him into the chair beneath the mind probe.  Control familiar to the Archivist and new to the Bookseller slid into place.

He looked at Jack as the headgear was lowered into place and winked.  Jack looked startled and the Welshman’s eyes smiled back.

The Bookseller didn’t know why, but he knew the Archivist had a plan.  The only problem was he didn’t know what it was and that this was still going to hurt; he just couldn’t let Jack give in.

 


	34. Chapter Thirty-four

Jack understood the wink and the smile he saw in Ianto’s eyes.  Since their mind’s entwined he had become aware of the moments where the Bookseller thought like his Archivist.

Both Ianto’s wanted to give him hope, both were so brave.  Jack wanted to scream and shout at their captors to take him instead but his worth was only his value to his lover.

He struggled violently against the bonds.  Jack knew how painful mind probes could be and he intended to rip apart anyone who used one on his beloved Ianto.

They fixed the probing equipment down on Ianto’s head and the Welshman tried not to flinch.  They switched it on; a mild surface probe that barely tingled, Jack could feel it though the haze of the psychic disruption.

Ianto’s eyes looked into his the whole time.  They seemed to be drinking the sight of him as though his presence alone was pure hope.

Then his eyes flickered away.  Amongst the Dolerigs there was a human who moved freely.  He came out of Jack’s peripheral vision and he recognised him.

Strong, handsome face with dark blond hair and hazel eyes.  It was a face Jack had once had beneath him, he always regretted that Suzie prevented him from strangling the bastard.

“Fredericks,” Jack breathed.

Jason Fredericks was a Torchwood One Field Agent with a vicious reputation.  He had always been sent on the nastier jobs where information was required from a suspect.

He had psychic abilities like Ianto but where the Welshman’s sense of morality prevented him from using his gifts against anyone, Fredericks was known to Jack as a mental rapist. 

“You were on the list of the missing, how did you survive Canary Wharf?” Jack demanded.

“By not being in their employ, it must have slipped their minds, what with that cursed Ghost Shift Project” Fredericks replied with distain.

The ex-Torchwood Agent turned to Ianto.  Not a flicker of emotion crossed the young man’s face.  Even through the buzz of the psychic blockers Jack could feel Fredericks reaching towards Ianto's mind.

Then he suddenly jumped away with a curse.  Again nothing betrayed him outwardly but he could tell the Archivist felt a flicker of satisfaction in kicking the other man away.

“So what’ve you been up to?” Jack asked pleasantly trying to draw his attention away from Ianto.

“I’m a fix it man.  You want to know something I can get it.  The Dolerigs here wanted to know the Morent Formula.  They’ve only just found out about the treaty between Gorana and Bezanikaz.  They were disappointed not to be included, especially as the Formula was part of the deal,” Fredericks answered.

“They probably were included but on both Nations mutual enemy list.  Weren’t the Dolerigs responsible for the last three wars between them,” Jack asked.

“Just so,” Fredericks said moving closer to Ianto again.

“I overheard your conversation in the cells.  Very sweet but a little naïve.  George was always very fond of pretty boys.  Your pet’s not the only one with psychic skills trained as a member of the Royal Order of Archivists,” Frederick’s said gloating.

“You mean you wormed your way in and made him tell you,” Jack said angrily and Frederick’s laughed.

“I was a normal kid once.  I thought I was heading for an army career but instead the cadet school I attended was a recruitment ground for Torchwood.

“George had these little perversions.  He liked to have power and knowledge.  They didn’t know I was a psychic when they recruited me but as soon as they did the head of Archiving began to seduce me.

“I know your reputation Jack but we did things together that might shock even you,” Fredericks boasted his smile wide for a moment.

“Then he came,” The ex-Torchwood agent snarled at Ianto.  “He resisted, he was Master Dorset’s pet, forbidden fruit, so tempting.  George wanted him.

“Then he became the unofficial last stage of recruitment.  Get past Iceberg Jones and you were in.

“They all knew exactly what he was, the all knew what he could so.  Sure they were nervous when it came to meeting him, but they all left liking him, they all hated me,” Fredericks raved.

Jack had to bite his lip before ‘ _Can’t think why’_ passed them and he got Ianto into deeper trouble.

“The treaty between Gorana and Bezanikaz should have been mine.  When the Dolerigs came to me for help getting it I thought, well George would have trusted me; an easy job but no.

“As soon as I realised I knew exactly which head it was in,” The madman was eyeing Ianto hungrily. 

“That was better in a way, I get to have revenge for what happened with Tony, I get to make you suffer like we did.”

Ianto cried out involuntarily as Fredericks signalled to one of the aliens to activate the probe.  Their bond might have been dulled but Jack could feel the echo of pain.

The ex-Torchwood agent then turned and stalked back to the Immortal.  He stroked a hand down Jack’s cheek in a gesture so intimate it was a violation.

“Don’t worry, I understand.  The best thing about love is sharing,” he said softly.

Another gesture and suddenly the buzzing stopped.  The psychic inhibitor field was lowered and Jack could feel the full force of the probe ripping through Ianto’s synapses.

In front of him Fredericks face lit up as though he was high.  Another gesture to increase the strength cause another cry of agony from Ianto and a quieter moan from their tormentor.

The awakening of Jack’s own psychic gifts meant that he could feel the pleasure Fredericks was experiencing caused by his pain.  He suddenly realised that it wasn’t just minds that this man violated.

Fredericks sat astride Jack and the Immortal was aware of a bulge in the ex-Torchwood agent’s trousers.  He focused on Ianto’s face and tried not to let his revulsion pass to his lover.

“I wonder what’s causing more pain to the Iceberg, the probe or the sight of us?” Fredericks asked and Jack didn’t answer.

The ex-Torchwood man was rocking slightly against him.  He made Jack feel dirty in a way he never had in the past.  For once he was grateful that their alien captors were there stopping this from becoming a floor show.

Fredericks signalled for the probe’s strength to be increased.  Jack could feel Ianto trying to resist and hold the pain back from the Immortal.

A peripheral movement was the only warning Jack got to brace his mind.  The stabbing pain made him look down to see a knife in his shoulder.

Ianto felt the echo but Fredericks felt the full effect.  He was surreptitiously palming himself as his pleasure increased.

This man was an aberration amongst empaths.  For most the feel of another’s pain was painful to them, it certainly was to Jack, but not for Fredericks.

The probe’ strength was increased and this time Jack was too focused on Ianto, on the only light in the room, to notice what the disgusting man on top of him was doing.

A second knife drove into his thigh.  Jack panicked and hoped no artery was hit, he didn’t think Ianto could cope with his death and rebirth.

Too late he realised that Ianto had felt that too.  For one strange moment Jack felt a whisper of love touch him.

And suddenly there was nothing.  There was no Ianto.

 


	35. Chapter Thirty-five

Fredericks jumped up as though he’d been doused by a tank of ice cold water.  He turned to the Dolerig at the probe’s controls.

“Why did you turn it off?” he demanded.

“I haven’t,” the alien replied offended.

“But he isn’t feeling anything.  Check his vitals,” Frederick’s ordered.

“They’re returning to human normal,” the Dolerig replied.

If Jack hadn’t been so worried he might have felt slightly smug.  He’d seen Ianto do this before, seen him retreat inside himself when the pain became too much.

“Maybe we’ve breached the barrier around the treaty information?” one of the other Dolerig said uncertain.

“Jones tell us the Morent Formula,” Fredericks demanded.

“Forty-two,” Ianto replied in a flat monotone and Jack blinked.  The Welshman had never responded when in this state before.

“Tell us the Morent Formula,” he shouted again.

“Forty-two,” Ianto replied.

“What is this?” the alien at the probe controls demanded.

“Forty-two.”

“Well I would say that it is a self-induced hypnotic state that he has conditioned himself to enter in situations like his in order to prevent you from getting whatever information it is you wish to obtain.”

As one, Jack and his captors turned to the sound of Ianto’s voice coming from the large banks of monitors.  There was Ianto’s face to go with the voice but a much younger version, younger that Jack had ever seen by a few years.

“Is it a projection from the probe?” Fredericks asked.

“No the probe is shielded and independent of the computers.  We didn’t want to risk outside interference,” the alien operating the probe replied.

“Damn irritating that or I would never have allowed you to use it,” the computerised Ianto replied.

“Who are you?” Fredericks asked.

“Wormstrom,” the computer’s image changed as it said the word.  It became a cartoon old man with glasses and the word was spoken as a curse.

“No, you don’t exist,” Fredericks protested.

“I compute therefore I’m in charge,” Wormstrom replied.

“What is it?” the Dolerig in charge demanded.

“It’s an intelligent computer super virus.  It takes control of a computer’s systems, assesses both computer and users as a potential threat and takes action,” Fredericks said still looking warily at the image of Ianto on the screen.

“Threat against what?”

“Jones.  Farnsworth was obsessed with him.  But it’s just a theory, a computer program to protect Jones.

“We investigated you, you were never more than an idea.  Why would Jones trust a civilian with such intimate details,” Fredericks spat.

“What a jaded view of humanity you have.  You need fear and control over someone before you trust them.  You cannot believe one person would trust another with only a simple bond of affection,” the artificial intelligence said with simulated pity.

“If it’s designed to protect Jones it isn’t doing a very good job,” the Dolerig at the probe’s controls muttered.

“To business so soon?” Wormstrom asked sadly.

“Attention!” Ianto’s voice echoed throughout the whole building.  “You are completely surrounded by UNIT forces.  Lay down your weapons and surrender.  I repeat you are completely surrounded by UNIT forces.  Lay down your weapons and surrender.”

“UNIT doesn’t know we’re here and even if they did our ships will simply lay down offensive fire and destroy them,” the Dolerig who seemed to be in charge said haughtily.

The image of Ianto on the screen shifted until he filled only the right half.  The left was divided by an image of men in black uniforms storming a building and space ships being surrounded by other ships.

“UNIT know you are here because I told them.  Your ships are being surrounded by a joint Gorana, Bezanikaz and Judoon taskforce.

“They know everything.  All your activities, all your schemes, all about your sleeper agents and your potential targets and recruits.  You are going to be made to stand trial for your crimes against the various species of the galaxy.

“Your ships are not able to escape.  Their engines do not work and they have no weapons.  I am co-ordinating with the Judoon to ensure minimum loss of life as they arrest your people,” Wormstrom said casually.

“That’s not possible.  No human can get into our systems.  You are not sophisticated enough.  All viruses are irradiated before they can get in,” the chief Dolerig snarled.

“You didn’t exactly let it in,” Fredericks said caught between the panic Wormstrom was creating and his enjoyment of it.

Before he could continue there was a rumble of noise from beyond the doors which everyone realised were wide open.  One of the Dolerig went over to close them but nothing happened.

They all turned to Wormstrom.

“I thought I’d make things easier for UNIT so I opened all the security doors and deactivated all the computer controlled weapons.  They will be happy as your species is one that is vulnerable to bullets,” the computer virus informed them.

“We still have Jones and Harkness we can use them,” the chief, Dolerig began.

“Cause any further harm to Ianto Jones and my vengeance protocol will be initiated,” Wormstrom said sternly.

“Vengeance protocol?” one of the Dolerigs asked.

In answer the image of the cavalry coming was replaced by pictures of Dolerigs and other aliens.  From the look of shock on their faces their captors recognised them.

“I don’t just know the plans of your organisation.  I know all the details of your families and friends.

“Thanks to the secure connection between this base and your ships I have intergalactic reach.  If any of you harm Ianto Jones further I will arrange for any one you have ever cared about to be killed.  And I’ll use your own money to do it,” Wormstrom said calmly.

“I don’t believe you.  This isn’t like Jones or Farnsworth,” Fredericks protested.

“My Vengeance Protocol was brought to my attention by a third party after my initialisation.  I saw the benefits of the addition and kept it,” Wormstrom replied.

“George,” Fredericks whispered.

“Shut down communications,” the chief Dolerig ordered.

“I don’t supposed you’ve heard of a Dead Man’s Switch?” Wormstrom asked.

“His vengeance program is probably in your ships already.  If you cut communications it will automatically activate,” Fredericks explained to the blank looks he was given.

“Stand down,” the chief Dolerig ordered.

“No you can’t.  You can’t let that machine rule you.  It doesn’t have any real power to stop you,” Fredericks shouted.

“It is threatening our families,” the Dolerig operating the probe protested.

“You do know I have a very special Nemesis waiting for you Fredericks.  I have details of all your crimes.  You will not escape justice,” Wormstrom said.

“No!” Jack yelled as he saw the ex-Torchwood man move.

Fredericks reached inside his jacket with a primal scream.  Jack struggled against his bonds despite the futility of the gesture.

Then a shot rang out.

 


	36. Chapter Thirty-six

Fredericks body dropped to the floor.  A knife clattered away from him.  Not that that mattered, the bullet hole in his head would prevent any further action.

“Nemisis,” one of the Dolerigs whispered.

“Actually I prefer Gwen Cooper.”

“Gwen get me out of this.  We need to turn off the probe and get Ianto back,” Jack ordered.

“I’ve got you,” said the voice of a nightingale before Martha Jones released him.

She wisely jumped out of the way as Jack rushed instantly to Ianto’s side.  He barged through one UNIT soldier subduing the Dolrigs who was not quick enough to get out of the way.

“Turn it off,” Gwen said menacingly pointing her gun at the Dolerig by the probes controls.

Jack could tell immediately when it had been switched off.  It was as though a pressure build up inside him had suddenly stopped.

“Ianto,” Jack asked gently taking his lover’s hand.

“Forty-two,” the Welshman replied in monotone.

“You know how to release him?” Jack demanded of Wormstrom as Martha reached him and tried to assess his injuries.

“Yes but first you must set up the therapy device,” the computer replied.

Behind the Dolerig a draw opened.  Inside was a device linked to two scull-caps.  He fingered them carefully knowing that one person had to wear the device to change the other’s mind.

“Why not just wake him up?” Martha asked he computer screen on seeing Jack hesitate.

“The device can only be used while the subject being altered is conscious.  When Ianto Jones is restored he will be in a great deal of pain,” Wormstrom replied shutting the doors as they heard footsteps approaching.

“So why not wait until he recovers,” Gwen demanded.

“This device has been illegal for decades.  UNIT and the Judoon have come to an arrangement regarding the arrest of the Dolerig.  When they do they will seize the therapy device and destroy it,” Wormstrom replied.

Jack hurried instantly to Ianto and began setting the device up.  Martha gave the UNIT soldiers looks not to intervene.

“Did Fredericks use this on him?” Jack asked.

“No it was Anne Taylor, the woman pretending to be Lisa Jones,” Wormstrom replied.  “They felt she would get a better response but he still fought.”

“That’s my Ianto,” Jack said.

“Do you know what you’re doing?” Gwen asked concerned as Martha took care of Jack’s shoulder and thigh.

“Yeah I’ve used one before when it was a sex toy,” Jack replied.  Of course then there had been a few more modifications to prevent the sort of violation Ianto had experienced.

Jack fitted the skullcap on Ianto’s head and then after a pause placed one on his own.  Martha placed a hand on his shoulder.

“I’ll be monitoring his vitals for you but you’re injured.  Would you rather someone else...?” she asked.

“No.  Ianto trusts me and I think he’s already shown me what I need,” Jack reassured her before turning to the computer.

“Bring him back,” Jack commanded.

Again the computer’s image stopped being Ianto's and instead became a cartoon old guy.  He was reaching up as he cried.

“Zoozoo,” before becoming Ianto’s younger face once more.

Ianto blinked then he slumped forward.  Jack caught him and raised his head and kissed him.  He poured his love and life into his beloved but not too much, they couldn’t afford for him to pass out this time.

“Jack,” Ianto croaked.

Martha was by his side instantly.  She helped Ianto drink some water as no one had released him.  The doctor then bent to untie him herself but Jack shook his head.

“Ianto I’m sorry I know you hurt but we have to use the therapy device now.  It’s the only chance we have,” Jack didn’t want to specify, this was Ianto’s last chance to refuse to become the Archivist again.

Instead the Welshman nodded tiredly.  He looked into Jack’s eyes wanting to know what he had to do.

“Ianto I need to take a look at your tree’s roots,” Jack said ignoring the baffled looks exchanged around them.

The Welshman smiled and bent his head forward.  Jack leant in to so that their heads touched.

The vision was the same as before.  Ianto as a tree of memory, reactions and interactions. He was drawn to the roots, the memories and experienced that made the Welshman the two men Jack loved.

Only this time he could see ghosts.  All the tendrils that had been voids before he could now see as translucent fronds, the dark tendrils made by the device also looked less distasteful.

Jack headed to the greatest set of ghosts, the memories of himself that made Ianto’s life worthwhile.  He went to the invading tendrils and began to unravel them.

He could feel the old memories and the new memories reaching for each other.  They laced together like fingers but didn’t merge.

Jack worked his way steadily though Ianto’s mind.  Removing the false memories and letting the original Ianto feel his way with the new Ianto.

He worked on the good memories first.  Ianto’s real relationship Lisa, his relationship with Jack, his friendship with Tosh, Gwen and Owen.  All those wonderful happy memories but there really wasn’t enough of them.

Jack looked at the tendrils remaining and hesitated.  They were not good memories.  They made the Archivist the man he was but the Immortal didn’t want to cause his lover the pain of their return.

He could suddenly feel a presence standing behind him.  If he had a back in this metaphor world the other would be pressed against his.

Jack felt the other guide his hands.  Make him undo the knots of around the worst moments of Ianto Jones’ life.

The battle of Canary Wharf, losing his hopes to see Lisa restored, grief and guilt of having to live on, the cannibals in the Brecon beacons, a hundred alien menaces encountered over four years at Torchwood but they weren’t what broke Jack’s heart.

Memories of caring for Lisa with no one to talk to, walking around invisible and hiding the pain of just existing, the slights from others, their lack of acknowledgement, the days and nights worked to exhaustion and no one caring that he became less and less every time he woke.

The moment Ianto learnt that Jack had kissed another man in 1941 and realising that Owen was right he was just a shag, the anger, jealousy and pain he felt that made him help Gwen, give her a chance to save Rhys so that she wouldn’t know the emptiness he had felt for months after Lisa.

Grief at losing Jack to Abbaddon but being unable to mourn for more than a few minutes alone in the Captain’s office.  The crushed feeling of realising that Jack had come back only to leave again after the Doctor.

The limbo of those months where Jack was gone and the uncertainty of his life when he was back.  All those times he felt his hopes build only for Jack to get scared and destroy them.

The loss of Tosh and Owen.  The growing certainty that, though he loved Jack, his feeling would never be returned, that their relationship was just Jack’s way of passing the time.

With the last of the therapy device’s work undone the presence behind Jack moved them back.  He wanted the Immortal to see the whole picture.

See where the bad events resulted in the good.  See were doubts and fears about Jack were swept away by the Immortal’s own actions making Ianto feel loved.

Then Jack realised the presence behind him was Ianto himself.

Jack came to himself with a start.  He moved back to look at Ianto, it was difficult to see with tears streaming from his eyes.

The Welshman looked at him pain in those beautiful blue eyes.

“I’m so sorry,” Jack said.

“Thank you,” Ianto whispered and passed out.

“Ianto,” Jack called.

“He will sleep now,” Wormstrom pronounced.  “It happened last time.  Sleep is needed for the mind to restore its balance.  For the old to adapt to the new and for the new to assimilate the old.”

“Jack he’s right.  Ianto’s readings indicated that he’s in pain but asleep.  Let’s get him somewhere more comfortable where we can give him something if he needs it,” Martha said reassuringly.

Jack ripped the therapy device from their heads and threw it carelessly away.  He didn’t notice Gwen moving over to it and surreptitiously grinding her heels into the delicate circuitry.

The Captain lifted his lover up and carried him out with no care of the burning pain in his shoulder and thigh.  The UNIT soldiers were left dealing with the Dolerig as Martha and Gwen followed him to the air ambulance.

He lay Ianto down gently on the gurney and took his hand.  He could feel the Welshman though their bond but it was faint.

Martha climbed into the helicopter with them and they headed away.

 


	37. Chapter Thirty-seven

An hour after they arrived at the UNIT hospital Ianto slipped into a coma.  The medics had taken a blood samples and brain scans when Ianto arrived and had begun processing them as a priority.

They could find nothing wrong with him apart from some unusual activity in his brain suggesting extreme pain and stress.  When they gave him a second scan a few hours later that was already beginning to calm.

Wormstrom sent the doctors details of the alien’s scans of Ianto from after the first time the probe and then the therapy device were used.  They speculated that the use of the therapy so soon after the probe aggravated the effects resulting in the coma.

The doctors were hopeful though that once his brain activity returned to normal that Ianto would come out of it.  He body was just recovering from the pain without his mind and it seemed to be doing that quickly.  The Captain assumed Wormstrom was responsible for the fact that none of them noticed his alien immune system.

Jack stayed permanently by his side and talked.  The Immortal knew he could probably push at their bond to wake Ianto up, but he could feel the lingering effects of the probe on the Welshman’s nerves as twinges along his own.

He hated it, but Jack knew that he had to be patient.  He also knew that when Ianto woke up he would be different, he was now both Archivist and Bookseller and Jack wasn’t sure what effect that would have.

Jack was also not certain if it really was a coma.  He wondered what one of Ianto’s self induced hypnotic hiding states would look like to the doctors.

While Jack was not denying that Ianto was in pain, he was sure the Welshman felt he wasn’t the only one with pain to deal with.

While Ianto made sure Jack knew how much he’d made their relationship worth it, there were still enough bad moments to make the Immortal think.  He had been so concerned with the fact that his lover was a mortal who would age and die that he had been blind to all the ways he hurt Ianto, tried to push him away, make him feel unloved.

Well Jack was going to change that.  He had let the Bookseller know how he felt now, he was going to let the Archivist know.  He was going to...

“Hi,” Gwen said interrupting his thoughts and resting a hand on Jacks uninjured shoulder.

“Hi,” Jack returned, his eyes not leaving the man in the bed.

He felt a flicker of disappointment coming from her but he didn’t care and it was only momentary.  Jack had been using his newly awakened senses a lot lately, trying to find out what the doctors weren’t saying but they all just seemed to be baffled.

“UNIT and I dealt with the Judoon.  They took all the Dolerigs away along with their ships and equipment.”

“Good,” Jack said quietly.

“Wormstrom was right.  The Judoon just logged the therapy device as evidence and destroyed it,” again Jack just nodded to her; he knew Judoon justice was swift.

“UNIT couldn’t find Wormstrom by the way.  It gave them control over the Dolerig computer and then erased itself and all Ianto’s data.  Although I believe it e-mailed you some surveillance video porn,” Gwen added as if trying to brighten things up.

The Immortal felt this situation was a little bizarre.  Ianto was the one in the coma but Gwen was talking to Jack as if he was the one in the coma waiting to wake up.

“Anne Taylor, the woman who pretended to be Lisa she wasn’t a mercenary, she was the PA of one of the politicians at your tribunal.  Her brother, Anthony Taylor used to work for Torchwood London.

“Wormstrom left evidence that Taylor and Fredericks were partnered and responsible for the deaths of One hundred and three people, seventy-eight were unmissed homeless people and illegal immigrants brought in as slaves, the other twenty-five were covered up by Torchwood One as casualties as a result of alien incursion.

“The homeless and immigrants were cleaned up and given hope by a woman who has been arrested as an accomplice.  They would then be sent to Fredericks and Taylor believing they had been given a genuine job offer, a potential future.

“All their victims were tortured or raped or both before they were murdered.  Fredericks and Taylor filmed all of them, I couldn’t watch the recordings,” she confessed quietly, giving a moment of silence before continuing.

“Wormstrom made some progress in identifying all of the victims and UNIT intends to pass that information on to the police.  They used an incinerator so there were no bodies for the families.

“Anthony Taylor died a few weeks before the Battle of Canary Wharf, I don’t know how those records were destroyed.  Anne though said that Fredericks blamed Ianto,” Gwen concluded.

 _Perhaps I am the one in a coma_ , Jack thought.  _She’s waiting for me to wake up, to take charge again, be Torchwood.  I thought she would understand that there are some things more important than Torchwood, she protests it often enough._

Jack let her talk on only half listening.  He didn’t notice when she left until he realised that it was quiet but even then he didn’t turn around to check.

The next touch on his shoulder was different, it was warm with understanding.  Yet it was insistent that he look at what was in the other hand, and waived said appendage under his nose.

There cushioned by beautiful, chocolate skin was Ianto’s dragon ring, the ring he had told her about giving Ianto when they last spoke on he phone.  He looked up at Martha Jones in wonder before tentatively taking it and putting it back on Ianto’s right hand.

“I noticed it was missing and had a couple of my boys scour that building looking for it,” she said with a warm smile.

“Thank you,” Jack said.

“But its return comes with a price.  You’ve accepted it back now you have to eat something,” Martha said handing him a plate.

“Martha I...”

“He wouldn’t want you to starve yourself.”  She reached out and lifted Jack’s right hand which wore the wild cat ring and brushed her thumb over it.

She didn’t need to say anything more.  Martha was looking after Ianto for her friend, and she would look after Jack on behalf of her fellow Jones.  That meant she could play the ‘what Ianto would want’ card and he was not allowed to argue.

Jack took her hand and kissed it.  He let go and began to tuck in to whatever it was she gotten for him.  Given the quality of army food, his lack of interest was probably to his advantage.

Ianto stayed unconscious for a few days but Jack didn’t really notice.  His hours were filled with time talking to his lover about what he planned to do.

These were interrupted by having to listen to Gwen try to remind him that he had Torchwood to return to.  She didn’t actually say it; she just talked about all the alien incursions she had had to deal with while he was away, the performance of the UNIT team she had been working with and the new staff she had recruited.

Martha interrupted him only to check Ianto’s vitals and to make sure Jack ate.  She arranged for him to have a change of clothes and some hot soapy water so that he could have a sponge bath in the private room.  She also let him bathe Ianto and move him to prevent bedsores.

Jack waited until the night after he stopped feeling phantom pains.  Martha’s scans showed that Ianto’s brain activity was almost normal and that all they could do was wait for him to wake.

That was when Jack opened his mind to touch Ianto’s, just a gentle caress, letting his lover know he was waiting.  He kept his worry and fears in check and sent his love along the bond between them.

“When you wake up things are going to change between us.  When you’re better I’m going to show you my tree.  It’s bigger than yours but most of it isn’t that important.

“You are at the heart of the tree roots though, I know it.  Okay so I haven’t actually had a look myself, I'm a little afraid to.  I want you to see it though, I need you to know me the way I know you.

“Because I want to ask you to marry me Ianto...”

“Yes,” croaked a quiet voice.

Jack looked down at his lover unable to believe what he just heard.  He looked the same as he had done for the past few days.

Then Martha rushed in.

“What happened?  We registered a change,” she demanded.

She didn’t wait for an answer she just began to check the man in the bed.  She called Ianto’s name a few times and he opened his eyes blearily for her.

“I said I was going to ask him to marry me and he said yes,” Jack said sounding pleasantly stunned.

As Martha turned to her friend she saw a huge smile spread across his face.  She hadn’t seen him look that happy in a long time; so she couldn’t tell him that coma patients were usually disorientated and had no idea what they said when they wake up.

Instead she congratulated him with a smile and went back to seeing to her patient.  She began thinking of ways to get Jack to leave his new fiancée’s side so that she could tell Ianto about his engagement.

 


	38. Chapter Thirty-eight

When Martha said that Ianto could go home if he was looked after properly, the Welshman was glad that Jack chose to return them both to York, despite Gwen’s objections.  He understood the Welshwoman’s position, he remembered well those months while Jack was gone with the Doctor, but he was glad of Jack’s choice.

The choice of the house in York was important because it was their house.  Jack had practically lived with Ianto before all this had happened, but the house in Cardiff was still Ianto’s.

Jack had been a little worried that the trauma of the police raid would put him off, but Ianto didn’t really remember much yet of the days before waking up.  Besides the house in Cardiff held bad memories too.

Ianto looked around the house for the first time since he woke up and the strangest thing was that it didn’t feel strange at all.  This was the Booksellers house with Jack but it felt so much like home to him now.

York also gave them the opportunity to re-explore the bond between them.  Ianto had never dreamed of ever forming a mental link with anyone, but to realise that Jack wanted this as much as him was sometimes overwhelmingly wonderful.

They went to all the places he and Jack had explored when he was the Bookseller.  There was a familiarity to all of them but they were also new because he was different.  What was best was the fact that his fiancée liked the new Ianto’s view of the world as much as he had liked the Bookseller’s.

His fiancée.

Ianto still couldn’t quite believe it.  When he started thinking more coherently he had listened to Jack’s plans for their future with a little confusion.

It didn’t help that Jack was clearly exhausted.  The worry and stress of watching over Ianto caught up with him and he was yawning constantly.

Ianto suggested to Jack that he rest his head in Ianto’s lap, just of a few minutes.  The Welshman stroked his lover’s hair as he fell instantly asleep.

When Martha Jones entered quietly a few minutes later Jack didn’t even stir.  She smiled at the sight and walked carefully around him.

“Congratulations on your engagement,” she said quietly.

“Engagement?” Ianto asked slightly too loud but Jack remained undisturbed.

“Jack told me that while you were unconscious he was talking about his plans and that he was going to ask you marry him.  You woke up and said yes,” she said gently.

Ianto looked in her eyes and knew she didn’t expect him to remember.  However all Jack’s talk about the future suddenly made sense.

He wished he could remember being asked but, like Martha, he wasn’t about to tell Jack that he couldn’t remember.  It was unimportant compared to the overwhelming happiness he suddenly felt at having been asked at all.

“Thank you, I intend to make him so happy,” Ianto croaked his eye filling unexpectedly with tears.

She handed him a tissue to dry them and then kissed his forehead.  He felt glad to have her approval.

They still hadn’t told Gwen though.  She was back in Cardiff and although they did return there briefly to sort out their Civil Partnership, they hadn’t met with her.

The ceremony was to be in a five months time.  Plenty of time for Ianto to recover and for them to plan everything.

There was however another reason why Jack had not told Gwen.  He was worried that Ianto would change his mind.

On their first night back at the house, the Immortal told him that when he said he wanted to share his life with Ianto he meant the past as well as the future.  Although the Welshman couldn’t remember, Jack told him that he had shared pieces of Ianto’s life in order to restore him and when he was recovered, Jack intended to do the same.

Part of Ianto wanted to protest that it wasn’t necessary but he remained silent.  The Bookseller understood and accepted in a way the Archivist would have tried not to.

Jack needed their relationship to be on equal terms.  In saving Ianto, all the things that he had hidden had been exposed.  Now the Immortal needed all the things he kept secret to be known and understood by his future husband.

It was a huge thing.  Ianto knew Jack wasn’t the hero he projected.  He wasn’t goodness and purity, hell meeting John Hart gave some clue as to how bad Jack had once been.

Ianto himself wasn’t exactly a saint, but he also hadn’t lived as long as Jack.  He just hoped the Immortal wasn’t going to give him a parade of past lovers.  That was one thing the Welshman felt he wasn’t up to.

_No, it isn’t going to be about past conquests.  Those Jack talks about he has some affection but little meaning the way I do._

Ianto knew Jack wanted him to know all the terrible things he had done.  All the bad decisions he had made.

He wanted his love to know them, understand them and the redemption the Doctor triggered.  Jack wanted to know once and for all that he deserved love and forgiveness, and if Ianto thought he didn’t, the Immortal would never try for another heart.

Before this, Ianto wasn’t sure he would have had the strength to learn Jack as he wanted to be learnt.  It wasn’t just the trusting innocence Bookseller telling him it would be alright.

Fredericks and the Dolerigs had tried to make him weak and they had failed.  Part of that was knowing Jack loved him and part of it was knowing the strength of his own love.

He wasn’t ready just yet though.  It wasn’t only that he still had some more healing to do, but there was something missing.

When he found that Ianto knew he would be ready.

 


	39. Chapter Thirty-nine

One morning just before dawn, on the way back from the bathroom, Ianto caught sight of his reflection in the long mirror.  He didn’t look at himself properly very often and suddenly he had this desire to see if he had changed.

He had done this once before long ago, Jack had been sleeping in the bed behind him then too.  That had been the night he realised he was in love with Jack, the night he debated whether or not to tell him, whether or not to change how they had been.

Then, Ianto had decided to wait, to be sure, to see if Jack showed any sign of returning or accepting his feelings.  That night had been before Abaddon, before Jack had run after the Doctor.

Ianto looked at himself, he was a little older, a little broader.  He was a lot happier even if he hadn’t had sex last night like he had then.

 _We haven’t had sex since we came back here._  Okay they both had injuries, but they were both physically healed now weren’t they?

“Good morning,” Jack said, coming up behind him while he was pondering and wrapping his arms and legs around his lover. “Still trying to see the most beautiful face in the world?”

“Well you only just came into my field of vision,” Ianto replied knowing full well Jack had meant his own.  The older man chuckled and Ianto leaned back against him.

“Mr Carmichael wasn’t a pervert and he didn’t fancy me.  Both he and Master Dorset only wanted me for my mind,” Ianto said quietly.  He was trying not to defend his former boss’s actions or alienate his lover; but he remembered his last hours as just the Bookseller and needed to explain.

“Well that’s how these things begin sometimes.  I, however want every atom of you,” Jack said defensively.

“You can’t want what you already have Jack,” Ianto said quietly turning to the man behind him.  The Immortal however captured his lips to reinforce his claim.

Ianto waited until Jack was finished.  He withdrew quickly as the Welshman feared he would.

“They really were in love Mr Carmichael and Fredericks, but it was over before I joined,” he said sadly.

“How do you know?” Jack asked.  The real question was _why are you telling me_ but the Immortal knew Ianto had a purpose and trusted him.

“Archivists are notorious gossips.  They were happy.  Mr Carmichael was the only person I knew who ever felt any affection for Fredericks, a touch of lost love,” Ianto said.

“What happened?”

“Master Dorset got appendicitis,” Ianto said.

For a moment they were both remembered the Englishman that always reminded people of a Japanese sensei, wise, old and sprightly.  He was only forty when Ianto met him and Jack’s remembrances had the fondness he reserved for special conquests.

Then they both remembered that Master Dorset had died with George Carmichael at the Battle of Canary Wharf.  They remained silent for a few moments out of respect.

“At the time Fredericks was the most powerful psychic in Torchwood.  While Master Dorset was off, they asked Fredericks to do what Master Dorset would never have allowed, they asked him to probe a mind.”

“I thought that’s what the Psych department was most interested in?” Jack said confused.

“Psychic ability is like sex.  There are different levels of touch and intimacy.  From caresses to something deeper and if they are consensual, they’re great.

“Bonds like ours are rare but they are usually formed during sexual intercourse.  It’s cliché but it is when you are at your most open and trusting, while making love to one who loves you in return, only deeper,” Ianto said briefly caressing Jack with his love.

“And probing another’s mind against their will is rape,” Jack said coldly.  “That’s what they did to you.  How can you stand to have me touch you?”

“For the same reason you let me in,” Ianto answered letting love fill his mind once more.  The Immortal responded by holding him close, physically and mentally.

 _It’s the same reason you don’t push me away despite a part of you that feels you should_ , Ianto thought quietly.

“Fredericks didn’t probe me because he couldn’t get past my defences.  I have some nasty ones that I can’t always control.

“That’s why they used a machine.  It couldn’t get my actual thoughts but it couldn’t feel my attack either.

“Torchwood One captured a terrorist that was planning to kill billions with alien tech.  They didn’t just need to know the devices locations but how to deactivate them.  They felt that probing his mind was the only way,” Ianto said returning to his story.

“Joe would never have allowed that,” Jack said fiercely confirming Ianto’s suspicions.

“Master Dorset was on sick leave.  Fredericks was the most powerful psychic at the time and he chose to do as they asked.

“Mental rape isn’t like physical rape.  You get to feel all the agonies that you are putting your victim though as though they were your own pains,” both men silently touched themselves. 

Jack let his hand trail from his head down his neck while Ianto’s hands went to the shoulder and thigh where his lover had been injured.  They both knew exactly how it felt to know another’s pain.

“During the Battle of Canary Wharf, I tried to destroy my own abilities because I couldn’t take the feelings of those around me, the howling in my soul, I had to make it stop.

“Fredericks couldn’t take the pain he was inflicting either, but he felt he had no choice, that he had to continue, so he twisted himself,” Ianto said his voice distant; his mind returning to the man behind him by Jack’s confusion.

“He made the pain feel like pleasure.  Made the gouges in the other’s psyche feel like a lovers caress against his own.

“He is believed to have climaxed as he peeled away the final layer.  He left the terrorist a vegetable, saved the day, but there was a price.

“When Jason turned to George for comfort because he found himself repulsive he discovered his lovers tender caresses burned like acid,” Ianto said sadly.

“He made pleasure painful,” Jack said softly.

“Yes.  The perversions he accused Mr Carmichael of, they were the only way he could make Fredericks feel pleasure and he hated it.  Fredericks found it far easier to believe he was corrupted by Mr Carmichael than face the truth that he did it to himself.”

“That’s why they broke up,” Jack said softly with sympathy for George.

“No they broke up because Mr Carmichael found out he was having an affair with Tony Taylor,” Ianto said bluntly.

“I can’t believe anyone could love Fredericks after what he did,” Jack said surprised and a little self conscious.

“It wasn’t about love it was all hate,” Ianto said darkly.

“Taylor was also psychic and had the same twist, though unlike Fredericks no one knew.  Master Dorset believed they only found out about each other because they were partnered together for a mission.

“Taylor was an avid homophobic, his sister too.  That’s how she could justify doing what she did, she felt that I was less than human.”

Jack pulled Ianto closer to his chest.  The Welshman rested his head on the Immortal’s shoulder and revelled in his humanity.

He didn’t need to tell Jack the disgusting things Fredericks and Taylor did.  Ianto knew that Wormstrom would have already dealt with that.

“What happened?” Jack asked.

“Do you ever have one of those mornings where you wake up and feel unaccountably good and the world is wonderful?”

“Every morning when I wake up with you,” Jack answered.

Ianto laughed until felt a pang of hurt from Jack.  He turned immediately to kiss his lover deeply.

Jack seemed to drink in his Welsh lover’s passion and fire then as before he stopped himself.  Ianto caressed his cheek before turning away and resuming his story.

“I had such a day.  When I project my feelings it isn’t exactly making someone else feel what I feel.  It isn’t like how I touch you.  It’s more like I have an aura of what I’m feeling around me and that touches another’s senses.  If it’s a good feeling, that morning after joy for instance, people often reach out to touch it, to feel that for themselves.

“Only it doesn’t end with people I meet.  Those people don’t just share my feelings they project their own aura for another to touch and pass on in return.

“Fredericks had the day off and I made everyone feel good.  Everywhere Taylor turned he was alone and feeling happiness and it hurt him.

“He came looking for me, to stop me as the source but Master Dorset realised what Taylor was and intercepted before he could get close.  Working in the secure archives also helped keep me safe.

“Master Dorset didn’t go into details, but he told me what I’ve just told you.  He told me to warn me as my own abilities were blossoming faster than they could believe.  They think I must have encountered some alien tech responsible for the acceleration.

“Taylor died and Fredericks went rogue,” Ianto said regretfully.

“Ianto that wasn’t your fault,” Jack insisted.

“And nor is what Fredericks did to you,” Ianto retorted and the Immortal froze behind him.

Ianto let his concern and love rub Jack’s mind gently.  He waited patiently as Jack allowed himself to accept the comfort.

“I’ve done a lot of things Ianto.  Hell I’ve even had mutual hate sex but I’ve never felt so unclean,” Jack confessed quietly.

“What about me?  Am I unclean?” Ianto asked softly.

“No don’t ever think that.  I need to feel the touch of your skin against mine, feel your mind entwined with mine but I can’t...” Jack faltered.

And there was the truth.  It wasn’t that Jack suddenly found Ianto repulsive, he was afraid of hurting him.

Jack wasn’t new to inflicting pain.  That was something Ianto knew Jack intended to tell him, and now Fredericks had used Jack’s pain to hurt Ianto.

Telling Jack that his own mind entered a hypnotic state to prevent it didn’t lessen the guilt.

Trying to explain what happened with Fredericks hadn’t helped either.  If anything he might have made things worse because Jack was new to using psychic ability, he didn’t have the teaching Ianto did.

Ianto could tell that Fredericks and the experiences in the Dolerig’s base hadn’t changed Jack in his mind.  His sudden fear of sex was purely psychological.

The pleasure Fredericks had taken hurting Jack and Ianto had been sexual.  Sex was the one thing the Immortal knew best and now it was tainted by causing his lover pain.

_Fredericks took his control.  In fact he hasn’t fully had control since they took us.  We have to get that back._

Behind Ianto, Jack relaxed as they sat together.  He could hear the Welshman thinking and knew everything was going to be alright.


	40. Chapter Forty

For the next few days Ianto tested Jack’s reactions.  The reason he hadn’t noticed a change before was that for the most part Jack was the same, it was just when it came to intimacy that he faltered.

That meant that Ianto’s arse in a good suit was ogled satisfactory.  Ianto’s lips when presented were ravished thoroughly with kisses and his body within touching distance was fondled and groped pleasantly.

It was when Jack felt the stirrings of arousal that he clamed up like sex was evil.  He would withdraw or hold Ianto still and close to him.

While he had been ignorant, Ianto had liked this tender seeming side of Jack.  Now he knew, it saddened him which in turn made Jack feel guilty and inadequate.

The Welshman decided that if Jack wanted him, he was going to have to claim him.  He was going to have to be cruel as tenderness was not working.

Ianto Jones began by deliberately getting himself aroused in bed.

They always had a cuddle and a kiss now before sleeping.  Jack, usually the first to be stirred and call things to a halt, was surprised to find the Welshman’s hardness against him.

Ianto leaned in to kiss Jack some more.  The older man seemed caught between wanting to be kissed and not wanting to be aroused himself, not wanting to hurt his lover.

Disappointment passed from the young man to the Immortal.  Ianto left the bed and headed to the bathroom to take care of his hard on.

He moaned and called Jack’s name loudly.  The role reversal from when Jack kidnapped the Bookseller was an irony not lost on either man.

Ianto though was not Jack.  Instead of heading back to bed afterwards he grabbed the spare blanket and pillow and went to lie on the sofa in the lounge.

He felt lonely and miserable doing so, but he refused to answer Jack’s mental entreaties to return to bed.  After an hour Jack came into the lounge and again Ianto gave him the cold shoulder.

After twenty minutes the Welshman feared that he might have pushed Jack a little too far when nothing happened.  He felt like he had failed.

Without warning Jack suddenly whipped the blanket away.  He lifted the young man into his arms and carried him back to bed.

Ianto didn’t struggle, in fact he leaned into his lover.  As Jack spooned possessively behind him, he radiated love and affection until both men were asleep.

For the next two nights Ianto repeated his performance of getting aroused and then taking care of himself noisily in the bathroom.  Jack didn’t react but both times he was waiting for the young man to finish so that he could make sure he went straight to bed.

The first night Jack did this Ianto was very pleased.  The second the Immortal was radiating guilty pleasure, not lust, but enjoyment of the Welshman’s own orgasm.

So on the forth night Ianto upped the stakes.

When Jack failed to respond to him he went to his bedside draw and got out a vibrator and some lube.  He also didn’t go to the bathroom but placed himself carefully on a bedroom chair.

Ianto lubed up his fingers and, closing his eyes, pressed one slowly inside.  He moaned Jack’s name as he worked the first finger within him then a second.

When he felt sufficiently open he lubed up, he took the vibrator and pushed that inside himself calling “Jack”.  Ianto heard a moan and opened his eyes.

The Immortal was standing a few feet from him and he was hard.  Ianto pulled the vibrator out to the tip, his eyes offering Jack the chance to take its place.

Jack looked away.  So Ianto rammed it back inside and called his lover’s name instead.  The Immortal looked up then and the Welshman closed his eyes once more.

Ianto moved the vibrator in and out of himself.  He wrapped a hand around his cock and gently stroked himself in time.

The Welshman was prolonging this as much as possible, silently begging Jack to take his rightful place between his legs.  He called his lover’s name loudly as he writhed and heard his own being softly moaned in answer.

He sneaked a glance at Jack and found the Immortal was mesmerised by the show.  He could feel how much Jack wanted to touch him but he couldn’t make himself step forward.

When Ianto could prolong his climax no more he screamed out and was unsurprised that Jack came to.  He waited for the aftershocks to still then slid out the vibrator.

Their eyes locked before Ianto raised his come covered hand and began to lick it clean.  The then walked over to Jack and did the same for his hand.

Ianto could feel exactly what kind of affect he was having, exactly how much Jack wanted him.  He stood a foot away and waiting for Jack to begin round two.

The Immortal wanted to so much he ached but Jack didn’t.  The Welshman felt frustrated and looked down at the vibrator in his hands.

Suddenly he felt a surge of jealousy from Jack.  The older man snatched the vibrator and threw it hard, smashing it.

He wrapped his arms possessively around Ianto.  Jack’s tongue claimed every millimetre of the Welshman’s mouth and the young man gave it to him.

Satisfied that he had staked his claim, Jack led Ianto back to bed and spooned him to his chest again.  The Welshman wiggled his arse against the Immortal’s cock until a hand stilled him.

The kiss to Jack’s favourite spot between his neck and shoulder was all the reassurance he needed.  The older man wasn’t ready yet but he wanted to be.

Ianto allowed Jack to have his way and settled happily to sleep because the Immortal’s afterglow of pleasure held no guilt at all.


	41. Chapter Forty-one

“I’ll be back soon,” Ianto called out as he opened the front door.

“What?” Jack asked in panic.

“I just have to go and get a few things I’ll be back soon,” Ianto repeated.

“Okay,” Jack said meekly as Ianto kissed his cheek.

Ianto left trying not to feel guilty.  He headed into town and promised himself that he would not to be too long.

It had occurred to him, while studying Jack that, since the Bookseller was taken from his home, they had not been more than twenty feet apart until the police raid.

Part of Ianto loved all the attention he was getting from Jack but the other part knew it was wrong.  Jack was a free spirit that was one of the things he fell in love with.  This clinging was unnatural, another sign of his lover’s lost control.

That was why Ianto decided to go out alone today.  He headed for the library and went to the local history section and picked a book at random.

He figured that he could just kill an hour reading and then go home and make sure Jack was alright.  Ianto checked and after the initial shock the Immortal seemed to be settling.

Ianto concentrated on the book.  It was fascinating and as he followed the argument he saw footnotes that lead him to another book, then that one led him to another.

Without realising it he had become totally engrossed.  He was a researcher but it had been years since he had researched anything just for the sake of doing it.

Suddenly he felt a surge of irritation.  He looked up, startled and saw the clock on the wall.  It was half past one; he should have been home for lunch over an hour ago.

Ianto realised that Jack wasn’t just irritated he was worried and angry and heading for him.  The Welshman couldn’t stop the thought that now was a perfect time to go back to last night’s game.

He put all the books away and headed to a few shops that he had seen that had just what he wanted.  He then found a reasonably clean toilet in which to change and hoped his suit would forgive his treatment of it as he stuffed it in the carrier bags.

Ianto then headed for the nearest sex shop.  Sex shops were really more Jack’s territory than his, but the Welshman needed to provoke the Immortal.

He was coming out of one of these shops when Jack finally caught up with him.  The older man stopped him and just stared at him taking in the new outfit.

When he did nothing else Ianto side stepped him and continued on his way.  He was grabbed roughly and spun around into the alley he was passing.

His back hit a brick wall and there were Jack lips on his claiming him.  Ianto surrendered melting beneath his touch.

Ianto felt the zip of his new jeans being lowered and the warmth of Jack’s hand against his cock.  He bucked into the hand moaning softly as his lover stroked him.

Then suddenly Jack withdrew.  Ianto whimpered as he was zipped back up and looked defiantly into his lover’s eyes.

Jack wasn’t moving back, he wasn’t being stopped by fear.  His eyes glittered darkly and he kissed Ianto back under his control.

“Go home and be waiting for me,” Jack growled.

“Yes sir,” Ianto replied and was kissed thoroughly again.

The Welshman practically ran home.  He took a shower and got everything ready and waited for Jack to return.

An hour later he looked from his cuffed hands, down passed his engorged, cock ring trapped member to his restrained feet.  The butt plug he was using made him squirm uncomfortable.

 _Well this is going well,_ he thought sarcastically _.  I pushed him too far and then let him have time to change his mind.  I’m sorry Jack._

Unable to release himself Ianto let his mind enter a state of meditation.  He hoped that when he woke he would be safe in Jack’s arms and that they wouldn’t mention it again.

* * *

Ianto Jones was driving Jack Harkness crazy.

First there was the game of getting himself aroused and finishing himself off while calling Jack’s name.  With him not returning to bed the first time but instead going into the lounge.

Jack could feel how miserable he was, but Ianto was a stubborn man.  It wasn’t until he realised that he couldn’t relax without the Welshman beside him, until he couldn’t bear how unhappy Ianto felt, that the Immortal picked him up and carried him back to bed.

Ianto didn’t struggle, he let himself be carried and stayed put.  Then Jack realised that the Welshman wanted him to claim him, wanted him to take charge.

That meant for the next two nights he was ready and waiting to take him back to bed.  On that third night as he waited he let his mind drift, let him feel how much Ianto was enjoying himself.

In the past that should have gotten him aroused.  Jack though was stubbornly refusing to acknowledge that side of his nature.

Of course last night Ianto didn’t give him a chance.  Jack knew he had lost the battle of wills against his arousal as soon as the Welshman pushed the first finger inside himself.

When Ianto realised the effect he was having, he offered Jack the opportunity to join in.  Part of him wanted that so much but his fear stopped him.

Ianto didn’t seem to realise how much Jack wanted to take him.  How he wanted to pound fast and hard into that arse and not care if he ripped and tore him.

He wanted to scratch and mark Ianto.  He wanted the Welshman to know who he belonged to but Jack couldn’t, he knew he would go too far.

Jerking off while watching the most erotic display he had ever seen though was safe.  He couldn’t hurt Ianto if he didn’t touch him.

The jealousy he felt afterwards for the vibrator surprised even him.  Ianto however was more pleased than frightened but its destruction and Jack’s need to possess his lover.

Now today he had gone out and Jack couldn’t help the surge of panic.  Ianto was only mortal, what if something happened it him?

The Welshman though was a very independent man.  It was one of the things Jack loved about him, one of the things the Dolrigs had taken away from him.

So he reassured himself that Ianto would be fine.  He checked occasionally and soon realised that the Welshman was reading something that he found interesting.

He wasn’t worried.  He knew Ianto would be back for lunch because Jack was making his special beans on toast.

When Ianto didn’t return, Jack knew he was still reading.  It took him an hour to work himself up, not with worry, but with anger.

He hadn’t meant to let Ianto feel his irritation but he was taking this game a little too far.  Jack knew his suspicions were correct when he felt the Welshman’s smugness.

He caught up with Ianto coming out of a sex shop.  For some reason it offended him that the Welshman had probably bought himself another vibrator.

It didn’t help that he was wearing ‘take me and shag me’ tight jeans and a studded belt like the one he had worn when they first met.  It was however the t-shirt that shocked Jack.

Normally he wore plain or elegantly patterned t-shirts.  This one was black with a fire breathing blue dragon on it.

Ianto was the master of silent messages.  Today, right now it wasn’t about the Welshman’s need at all.

He wanted Jack to fly free.  He wanted his fiery blue dragon again.

After Ianto then walked away Jack hadn’t been able to help himself lay his claim to the Welshman.  He made sure his lover knew who was boss.

He loved the touch of that warn cock in his hand and the body that seemed to melt beneath his.  He ordered Ianto home and intended to turn up after an half an hour.  Let Ianto wait as payback for all his teasing.

Yet as he waited, all Jack’s second thoughts crept up on his diminishing anger.  His let them take over his mind and half an hour became an hour.

Suddenly sorrow and failure washed thought him.  Regret and apology mingled before everything became calm and still.

Then Jack realised he might have left things a little too late, had let his fear have too much control.

Ianto Jones had just given up on him.


	42. Chapter Forty-two

Jack Harkness ran home and bounded as quickly as he could to the bedroom.  The sight he was met with told him exactly why Ianto was so important to him.

It wasn’t the sight of restrained, naked man that he loved that told him this.  It was the array of toys he had left waiting to be used.

Paddles, whips, stunners, vibrators, nipple clamps and lotion.  Ianto had never expressed any interest in getting pleasure though pain, he knew too much pain and not enough pleasure to understand it.

Yet here they were.  Anything he might wish for.  All to be used on Ianto, tools to use to let Jack make his marks, give the pain and pleasure he feared he wanted to give. 

A sign of absolute trust.  The sign that Ianto knew Jack wouldn’t harm him even if he didn’t trust himself.

Now Jack felt like he had broken that trust.

The released Ianto from his restraints and went to the bathroom to get the baby oil.  He removed the cock ring then turned Ianto over and removed the butt plug.

Jack then poured baby oil onto his hands to warm it and began to massage Ianto’s back.  The Welshman had probably been very uncomfortable and easing the discomfort was the least he deserved.

Once he was finished with the back Jack turned his lover over and gave as much attention to his front, to the limbs and torso.  He was a little surprised after finishing the last leg to see a hard cock waiting for attention.

Jack turned to see Ianto’s eyes wide open and watching him cautiously.

“I’m sorry,” Ianto said quietly.

“No, no I’m sorry,” Jack said moving to kiss Ianto.

“I love you,” they said together and kissed again.

Ianto looked expectantly at Jack who wasn’t sure what to do next.  Then the Welshman turned away and looked down at himself.

Failure and inadequacy flowed though Ianto as if he was no longer good enough for Jack.  To the Immortal though it was the other way around, he was the one who had proved unworthy of this beautiful man.

Ianto moved to head for the bathroom but Jack grabbed his hand.  The Welshman looked up at him in challenge and swung his free hand to hit him.

Jack caught it as Ianto had intended that he would.  He pulled Ianto’s arms back into their restraints then kissed him thoroughly.

First order of business was that beautiful cock.  Ianto deserved to be pleasured for all the trouble he had put him though.

Jack felt his own arousal swell at the first taste.  The smell and feel of the Welshman in his mouth made him ache so much that he couldn’t believe he had resisted for so long.

Ianto was quiet as Jack worked.  He knew how much the Immortal liked his voice and he was going to make him work for every noise.

He whispered Jack’s name as he came and the Immortal drank him down greedily.  He then slipped the cock ring back on because the tease deserved to be punished with pleasure.

He turned Ianto over to give attention to his back once more.  This time he kissed and sucked and lightly scratched his skin.

He marked out his initials, his true initials in the language of Boeshane, upon Ianto’s back as he had several times before.  This time though he added a J to Ianto’s left buttock and a H to the right.

He then checked how open Ianto was, then slicked up a vibrator and pushed it inside.  He set it to the lowest setting with a grin as the Welshman growled.

Ianto was hard again when he turned him over.  Jack though was lavishing all his attentions on his limbs, marking and claiming his favourite spots.

Jack got off the bed as he worked on Ianto’s torso.  He was trying to pleasure the Welshman while ripping off his own clothes.

Once naked he settled between Ianto’s legs.  He played with the vibrator working it in and out before sliding it free.

He slicked himself up and then pushed himself inside.  He was harder than he intended and Ianto let out a soft groan.

Then Ianto’s legs were around his waist, preventing him from withdrawing, pulling him in deeper, telling him it was alright.  Jack kissed him then began to move at a hard and fast pace.

The pleasure radiating off of Ianto was nothing like what he had felt when sorting himself out for the past few nights.  This time he felt complete, whole and loved and Jack increased his pace wanting him to feel more.

They climaxed together but the cock ring prevented Ianto’s release.  Frustration and happiness flowed into Jack and the Immortal knew that Ianto only felt like this with him, for him.

Jack kissed Ianto’s lips, neck and shoulders until he felt himself hardening inside the Welshman once more.  This time he moved slowly, tenderly, letting his own amazed love flood his lover’s senses.

Ianto wasn’t screaming his name.  He was calling ‘I love you’ louder and louder with every slow sensual thrust.

As Jack felt them both building towards their orgasms he released Ianto from the cock ring.  Hearing Ianto call ‘I love you Jack’ made Jack come harder than the first time.

He released Ianto’s arms and pulled him closer.  He kissed and held him wanting him to know how wonderful and amazing he was.

Now he knew he was ready.

“Ianto, I need to know that you love me,” Jack said quietly.

“How can you doubt that given that you can feel how much I do?” Ianto asked confused by this sudden return of doubt and fear.

“I need to know that you can love all of me.  That you know my past and love me for it as I love you.  I need you to see my tree,” Jack said urgently.

Ianto kissed Jack’s lips then moved to rest his forehead against his lover’s.  He was resting against the door to his memories and Jack let him in.


	43. Chapter Forty-three

Jack’s memories were vast compared to Ianto’s.  The Immortal though steered him to the larger roots, those that were most important to the centre of his being.

He saw Jack’s life on the Boeshane Peninsula, his happy family before the invaders took Grey.  He saw a frightened boy let his brother’s hand slip free then turn back too late to find him.

Ianto wept as Jack mourned his father and then had his mother reject him.  Unlike the Immortal, the Welshman could see that this was not the child’s fault.

He saw Jack join the army with a friend, saw them being captured and his friend tortured, saw his rescue by a special forces team, not just physically but morally saved.

He witnessed Jack’s time at the Time Agency, his relationship with John Hart, the corruption caused by power, the great and terrible things Jack did for them, the decision to have a child and lose it.

There was a void, an absence of memory, different from Ianto’s, which Jack felt was responsible for his child never existing.  Ianto saw his lover become a con artist and get revenge by damaging the Time Agency’s wallet and stepping a few of their schemes.

Then Jack met the Doctor.  Ianto understood now why Jack loved him.  Saw his lover change and grow towards being the man he loved.

Then there came the Game Station and Jack’s first death.  He knew now why Jack was never going to leave with the Doctor, never going to completely forgive him, despite a part of him still loving him.

Jack’s coming to Nineteenth Century Earth, his hundred and fifty years with Torchwood, they were somehow the worse.  The hero the Doctor had made Jack was eroded by his inability to die, the hopelessness of his wait.

There were moments of brilliance, every time Jack fell in love but he didn’t always give his full heart.  There was always death, fear of watching his love grow old, the secrecy of Torchwood and their inability to understand that he had no choice but to go on.

Every time he became the hero, losing his lover made him close his feeling down, stop him from caring and that was when Jack made bad choices, followed blind orders.  Ianto wept as his wife left him taking their daughter, as Jack’s love for the Doctor turned to hate.

Yet that was something the Welshman understood, though he was the opposite.  It wasn’t not caring that made Ianto make mistakes, it was caring too much and being hurt, that was when he did terrible things.

Then the terrible burden, the death of Alex and his team, becoming Head of Torchwood Cardiff.  Alex’s words spurring him on to make things better for his lost friend.

Jack tried to do it all on his own but couldn’t.  His recruitment of Susie, to safeguard her and the rest of the world at the same time was the start.

Saving Tosh from an imprisonment she didn’t deserve, more in sympathy for her than because he felt he needed her.  Jack could have had anyone but her circumstances and the defiance against UNIT and Torchwood London made her special.

Owen with his grief and determination singling him out.  How Jack saw such hopes of saving him as he had once been saved, to try and make things right without even being sure how.

Then the battle of Canary Wharf, losing Rose Tyler.  Ianto had felt grief this deep, felt the death of hope and sent his mind out to hold Jack.

Then suddenly there he was.  The unnecessary rescue from the Weevil, the coffee outside the Tourist Office Entrance, catching Myfanwy.

Then Gwen with her humanity because he now wanted to remember how to be human.  She was another guide for his soul like the Doctor and Rose.

Ianto’s betrayal, Jack’s realisation of what he had become.  That he had found Gwen Cooper too late to prevent Ianto’s pain.

The rebuilding of their relationship, understanding of each other in the darkness.  Jack being too afraid to let their relationship mean what he hoped for, what Ianto was giving him.

Then Bilis Manger, the second betrayal and Abbaddon.  How that kiss filled Jack with so much life but how he needed his answers then more than ever.

The price for knowing, the year of hell Jack had told him of he now experienced.  Those memories were blurred.  Jack was trying to shield himself from the pain rather than keep secrets from Ianto and the Welshman understood.

Jack’s new relationship with Ianto was at the core of his being, just as Jack’s was at his.  It let Jack become the hero again, let him love the Doctor again, let him live contently.

Then John Hart and Gray almost destroyed it.  Killed Toshiko and Owen.  Jack felt his deep grief but he had Ianto to make it bearable, to stop him from descending into his own darkness again until the Dolrigs took him.

Ianto Jones opened his eyes and looked into Jack’s frightened ones.  There was a lot of darkness in his lover’s past but it didn’t hold his soul.

He was trying to be better, always trying, just not always succeeding.  It was more than love that Jack needed from Ianto.

The Welshman pressed his lips gently to Jack’s.

“We all make mistakes Jack; we aren’t always in control of our circumstances or in charge because we have a boss.  We all do the wrong thing sometimes.  It’s deciding to do the right thing, deciding that from now on we will try to do the right thing that makes us better men,” Ianto said softly.

“But I keep on going back to doing the wrong thing,” Jack protested.

“And then you keep choosing the right thing.  Neither of us are saints, we are human beings, we’re imperfect.

“Yes you’ve done terrible things but you’ve been trying to make up for that for over a hundred years.  That you try that’s what’s important, how can I not love you knowing that?”

Jack didn’t answer.  He just looked away still not quite ready to accept the forgiveness that his lover was readily offering him.

“If you could do it all again?  If you could without any consequences change your bad decisions would you?” Ianto asked.

“Most of them yes,” Jack answered looking awkward.  Then he looked Ianto in the face and said “As long as I still got to meet you, have _this_ relationship with you then yes I would change them all.”

Ianto kissed him passionately and the Immortal held him closer.  Kisses turned to something more and this time as the Welshman made love to him it was Jack who chanted ‘I love you’ at the top of his lungs.

 

 


	44. Chapter Forty-four

Gwen, Rhys and Martha were waiting outside Ianto’s house when they returned to Cardiff.  They had takeaway food and plates and cutlery and the lovers welcomed their friends inside.

 Dinner was a happy event.  The friends were reuniting after months apart and they had a lot of catching up to do.

Martha had her own plans for marriage and Jack loved to hear the news about her family.  Rhys was doing well in the haulage business and had lots of funny stories about his mates.

Yet as Gwen talked about Torchwood and the changes she had made, Ianto began to tense up.  Outwardly he seemed fine but inwardly, where only Jack was allowed to see, he was on edge.

“Don’t worry I’ll have everything ready for when you’re back,” Gwen said reassuringly before eating another mouthful of takeaway.

Fear and tension spiked in Ianto making Jack look at him sharply.  Martha who sat next to him, who knew a little of the bond between them looked at the Welshman to.

“Well it’s going to be a while before Ianto can go back.  I’m not returning him to active duty until I’m sure the Rift is going to have no effect on him.  We don’t want there to be any hidden surprises,” Martha said before silence could fill the room.

Jack knew it was a lie to reassure Ianto and she didn’t really think the Rift would have an effect.  The Welshman’s fear though didn’t lessen, it was not his duty then that frightened him.

He looked at Jack and then tried to shake the feeling off as nothing.  It was only when the Welshman studied Rhys for a moment that he seemed to find his reassurance.

That night Ianto made passionate and possessive love to him.  It wasn’t usually in Ianto’s nature to want to own him, but that night he seemed to be trying to reassure himself, and tell Jack, that he was the best the Immortal was going to get.

That night the nightmares started too.  Ianto was deliberately blocking him from his dreams so Jack could only stroke him as he slept to offer his reassurance.

Jack found himself coming up with excuses not to go to the Hub, but despite that Ianto started to become distant and withdrawn.  It was as though he was preparing himself to lose Jack and that frightened the Immortal very much.

Ianto didn’t sleep very well the night before Jack finally went to the Hub.  Early in the morning the Welshman made love with the same passionate possessiveness he had the night they returned.

In the afterglow of their coupling Jack didn’t want to leave, especially as he could sense Ianto withdrawing again.  It felt too much like a goodbye and that was the last thing he wanted.

He had plenty of time, so Jack made love to Ianto until the Welshman was exhausted and slipped into sleep.  It made him feel even more reluctant to leave, but he couldn’t put his return off any longer.

Before he left Ianto though he got out a box he had hidden in one of their bags and opened it.  He removed the packaging as quietly as he could and then stood the china blue dragon on the nightstand where the Welshman could see it.

It wasn’t the most attractive model ever made, nor the most expensive, but it was blue and looked fierce and it was a message for Ianto.  One he hoped Ianto would understand and be reassured by.

As soon as the cogwheel door to the Hub opened Jack knew he didn’t belong here.  It was the same place he had known for the best part of a hundred and fifty years but he no longer felt welcome in it.

Going to his office made him feel worse.  It smelt of Gwen’s perfume and all his things had been moved or put away to make room for files.

A curious glance at his bunk confirmed that how cold and uninviting it was.  That was not a place to live, not for him, not anymore.

The sudden alienness of a place he had considered a home for over a century made him feel panic.  He wished Ianto was here but at the same time realised exactly why his lover now feared Torchwood.

Then he saw the box.

It was missable from the door and because of the paperwork, hidden from the chair as well, but from by the entrance to his quarters though it was there to see and Captain Jack Harkness rarely gave up the opportunity to open things.

The box was addressed to him in Ianto’s handwriting.  It had been posted over a week ago, when Jack started mentioning visiting the Hub to collect more of his things, and had been waiting for him to arrive.

He opened it eagerly.  Inside was a cuddly stuffed panther.  He lifted it out as though it was made of glass and stared at it.

Ianto hadn’t been able to explain how he was feeling, but he had wondered if Jack would feel the same way too.  This could either be a daft romantic gesture or the comfort it was right now.

Jack absently stroked the toy as he thought about his unexpected reactions.  He could see now that his reluctance to return was more than just concern for, and desire to be with, the man he loved.

He thought about what to do next.  He remembered the look Ianto had given him over dinner the night they returned to Cardiff and understood that the decision was his.

In some ways choice can be frightening.  He was considering leaving his comfort zone but looking around again he knew he had already left.

Thinking of Ianto made his decision so easy because in making it, he knew exactly what he wanted to do next.  Plans and notions formed in his mind and filled him with excitement.

There was only one obstacle now.  Only one thing that he had to overcome, one person he had to make understand.

He gave the toy panther a last stroke and a kiss for luck and tucked it in the pocket of his greatcoat.  He had lots to organise in order to put his plan into action.  The further along he was, the easier things were going to be when it came to the inevitable confrontation.

He fired up the computers and began to make his arrangements while he waited for Gwen Cooper to arrive.

 


	45. Chapter Forty-five

“Oh you’re back,” Gwen squealed with excitement and ran to him to hug him.

She then began to give him the situation report, re-tell him everything she had told him over dinner on his first night in the city.  He listened to her and, though she didn’t realise it, she was making this easier for him.

“I had to hire someone to help with the archives so when Ianto comes back it will be up to him whether or not he keeps on archiving or becomes a field agent proper,” she said looking to him for approval.

“Ianto isn’t coming back,” Jack said.

“What?  Is he alright?” Gwen asked with concern.

“He’s fine but he isn’t ready to come back just yet, maybe not for a long time.  I hope he never comes back to Torchwood and I’m not staying either,” Jack replied.

“What?”

“I’ve just come back to sort a hand over out and to collect my things.”

“What? Why?  After everything why aren’t you coming back?” she asked.  Given how much he had put this visit off, he felt that she was overreacting a bit.

“Because Ianto would follow me into hell.  If I come back he’d want to be by my side and I don’t want him anywhere near this place right now,” Jack said.

“I don’t understand,” she said shocked.

“Do you know what Survivor’s Guilt is?” Jack asked.

“It’s a form of PDST.  The inability to cope with surviving a disaster when others you know didn’t,” Gwen answered confused.

“When Ianto arrived here that what he had.  After the incident with the Cyberwoman, after he lost the last of Lisa, it became worse.

“Torchwood became Ianto’s prison, his penance and punishment.  I wonder sometimes if in that early part of our relationship if I was an expression of his free will or his jailor,” Jack said sadly at a familiar idea reworded.

“I’m sure it was nothing of the sort.  When you were away he could have left too, he almost did leave, but he chose to stay,” Gwen said firmly.

“You’re an ex-cop, do you know the statistics on prisoners who reoffend because they can no longer cope with the world outside?

“Do you think Ianto would have given me a second chance if in his mind he hadn’t already decided that this was all there was to his life?” Jack demanded gesturing at the Hub.

“You’re selling yourself short.  I’m sure it’s not like that.  I mean who wouldn’t want you?” she asked trying to cheer him up.

Jack could tell that she meant that, at one time, given the chance, she would have wanted him.  She didn’t realise Rhys was her key to freedom, she couldn’t see the Immortal for what he was, despite having let her get closer than most.

“While he was the Bookseller he didn’t have that guilt.  Now he remembers who he was, I can see that he understands Canary Wharf wasn’t his fault, that he’s already made amends for the deaths of Tanazaki and Anne.

“This whole experience has given him perspective, it’s set him free.

“Ever since you mentioned coming back here he’s been frightened.  It isn’t the aliens and dangers that scare him.  It’s the thought of becoming a prisoner again.  It’s knowing that if we comes back he won’t just become second to Torchwood, he’ll want to be second to Torchwood,” Jack explained.

“So just say to him he can’t come back.  He’ll understand why you have to do this,” Gwen replied distressed by the thought of losing him.

“Don’t I deserve to be free too?” Jack asked quietly.

“What?” Gwen said repeating the word of the hour.

“I’ve worked for Torchwood for over a hundred years while I waited for the Doctor.  Sure I sometimes went away, did my own thing for a little while, but I always came back.

“I had the chance to leave too.  I could have travelled the universe, see the most amazing things in all of space and time.

“I didn’t come home to be your leader again.  I came back for him because he was Torchwood and he is my home.

“Only when they took him did I realise how important he is to me.  How much Torchwood was still just my way to pass the time,” he replied gently.

“So what will you do?” she demanded.

“We’ll stay in Cardiff until our Civil Partnership ceremony and then we’re going to travel.  I think I’ll take up painting again, writing, maybe photography.  I might even persuade Ianto to do a history doctorate, he’s so a peace when he’s researching,” Jack said excited.

“And how are you going to finance this great scheme?” she asked angrily.

“We both have money Gwen.  After the alcohol stopped working I really didn’t have all that much to spend mine on, plus there’s the interest of over a hundred years of savings.

“As for Ianto, the agencies associated with the people at my tribunal, while not involved with the proceedings, felt they owed Ianto some form of compensation for what he was put through.

“Also Gorana and Bezanikaz never expected Ianto to be in danger, nor that he would their own representatives protect their treaty the way he did.  Their gift was very very generous and all in all he has more money now than I so,” Jack said waggling his eyebrows.

“So that’s it, you’re just going to walk away?”

“He’d follow me in to hell; I want to follow him into paradise.  We have a couple of months I’ll do a proper hand over, make sure you are okay but yes that will be it,” Jack said firmly.

“You’re really going to marry him?” she asked quietly.

“I know commitment, it’s scary.  But not having him is even more frightening.  He can’t promise me the forever I would give him, so I just have to have every second I can.”

Gwen nodded reluctantly.  She could still remember when Billis killed Rhys, how Torchwood stopped being so important until she realised she could use it to get Rhys back. 

“Oh congratulations,” she said and gave him a huge hug.

Tears flowed for both of them as they knew their lives were going to be different from now on.  Gwen made herself accept Jack’s choice.

They made arrangements to keep in contact while the Immortal travelled, then they got down to Torchwood business.

 

 


	46. Chapter Forty-six

Jack returned from the Hub and went straight to the bedroom.  The house was clean, the bed changed and the naked Welshman inside it had showered.

The Immortal lost no time in becoming naked himself and making love to his bed’s occupant.  There were some great advantages in having a psychic connection with your lover.

“How about tomorrow we look at some of those houses for us you’ve been eyeing,” Jack said in the warm afterglow.

“Don’t you have to go back to Torchwood?” Ianto asked confused.

“I have some things to sort out and more of my stuff to get but nothing that can’t wait a day or so.  Gwen’s been doing a fine job without us.  I think she could do with being given a little more space,” Jack answered.

“You told her we’re getting married,” Ianto said.

“Yeah.”

“And she asked you about Wormstrom.”

“Yeah,” he repeated quieter.

Jack thought that Gwen was accepting is decision until she asked about the computer programme.  He hadn’t felt like asking Ianto about it before but she was pushing until he wanted to know just to shut her up.

Ianto just smiled knowingly then began.

“After my first year at Uni I stayed with friends in London and worked as a waiter in a good hotel.  After my second year I intended to do the same thing.  I got the job and started alright but on my first night at one of my tables was Professor David Farnsworth.

“Davey was a computer boffin and he was staying there while working for the MOD.  That night and the next all he did through dinner was stare at me,” Ianto said shyly.

Jack understood the desire to stare at Ianto but he couldn’t help the flare of jealousy.

“You know I don’t like to be stared at,” Ianto said trying to reassure.

“But every inch of you is so beautiful,” Jack replied making Ianto blush.

“If I told you that this was your only opportunity to hear about Wormstrom, but you had the choice between listening and ogling my naked body which would you choose?” Ianto asked curiously.

Jack didn’t hesitate, he lifted the sheets and shuffled back to admire the sights.  Ianto let him stare until the Immortal’s fingers began to twitch to touch him, then he covered himself but shuffled closer.

“I want to tell you about Wormstrom.  It’s a secret no one else knows but I want to tell you,” Ianto said quietly.

“What about Wormstrom’s creator?”

“Davey was working in London for the MOD a month after the battle of Canary Wharf, working on Torchwood’s systems.  He was killed in a knife attack, the police never found out who did it,” Ianto said quietly.

“Ianto I’m sorry,” Jack said quietly.

“It’s alright, you let me go to his funeral, I got to say goodbye,” Ianto replied but he was silent for a long while.

“As I was saying, I got a job as a waiter in the Hotel where Davey was staying.  I worked for two nights but I was sort of fired before the next night and hired by the MOD to be Davey’s companion.  I was to keep him company, look after him and encourage him in his work while in London,” Ianto said and again there was a flare of jealousy.

Swiftly Ianto pressed his body against Jack’s.  The Captain’s hands automatically wrapped possessively around him.

“You do know how much I am yours?” Ianto asked searching Jack with his eyes.  “That my lips know another man’s kiss, that I know the body of a woman are the only points upon which I was not your virgin?”

Jack kissed him passionately telling him that yes he did know, part of him wishing he could say the same.  He knew his jealousy was unfounded, but Wormstorm seemed too powerful to be a gift for a friend.

“Yes he loved me,” Ianto said knowing Jack’s mind too well.  “But I was also barely an adult and I didn’t show any interest in him.  I was like a princess in a tower to him, untouchable.

“We didn’t discuss his work although he did use me as a sounding board sometimes.  Then one day we were discussing computerised information and that’s when the idea for Wormstrom came to him, George Orwell’s revenge,” Ianto said distantly.

“What do you mean?”

“Do you have any idea how much computerised information there is on the average twenty-first century individual?  How many databases hold the knowledge of the average person’s existence?

“There are records on dates of birth, every address you’ve ever lived at, what schools you attended, what grades you have, what jobs you’ve done.  There are financial records of how much money you earn, how much tax you pay, national insurance, passports, criminal records.

“There are also medical records from some GP surgeries and at hospitals, reports for insurance companies.  Most people have e-mail, personal documents on the PC at home.  There is also internet websites and social networks on line.

“Big Brother doesn’t really need all that CCTV to watch us when with the right software your whole life can be extracted.  We know because we’re Torchwood and we can,” Ianto said darkly.

“And Wormstrom is George Orwell’s revenge,” Jack said glad that he didn’t have so many records through being a Fifty-first century guy and by having been around before the digital age began.

“Most people’s records are held on different databases.  A lot of times the information can overlap.  Date of Birth for example is known by all your banks and building societies, tax people, the police, the passport agency, driving licence people and it’s a standard question when joining on-line communities.

“Each database is different.  They are tailored to the company and what the company requires, not just in terms of information and information use but also security features to protect that information.

“When Torchwood wants to know everything about a person’s life we have the software to hack into all those different databases and download the information into our own files.  We are careful to have firewalls in place but we are just extracting an assembling legitimate data, no viruses.

“You don’t download Wormstrom as a whole virus; you assemble it in a secure file.  Minute changes to every database containing my details means that with each scrap of information you also take a piece of Wormstrom.

“It isn’t just the databases either, it’s the data itself.  You check out one database and it says I was born on the 19th August, 1983.  You check another and it says 2nd December, 1982.  There is always human error so you decide to check a third and you find that I was born in August so you correct the information from the second source.

“I bet you though I kept one of my accounts at £444.44 either because I’m a little OCD or because it’s a tribute to Agatha Christie’s Poiriot. I don’t, it’s because that’s part of Wormstrom’s program, a check to make sure I’m okay,” Ianto said and Jack nodded in understanding.

Jack had checked the Bookseller’s accounts when checking up on Ianto.  The sudden change of amount in that account had saddened him, it was a sign then that he had lost his lover.

“In assembling Wormstrom within your system, it learns your system.  Internal firewalls are rare so it infiltrates all your computers and becomes a passive element in the operating system.

“Unless it perceives you as a threat to me.  Then it becomes your computer’s operating system, it gathers information to determine the best course of action to take to protect me.”

“There’s a version of Wormstrom in the Hub?” Jack asked carefully.

“Yes, since Tosh did her security check.  It is only a part of the operating system, you still control the Hub.  I told Wormstrom you weren’t a threat to me,” Ianto said smiling hesitantly.

That meant a great deal to Jack.  The Immortal knew how dangerous he was, how dangerous he was to Ianto, as a man and because of Torchwood.  To be off of Wormstrom’s threat list was a sign of deep trust from a man who, at the time, was unsure of the Immortal’s feelings.

“There was a version at the Torchwood Tower too.  Mr Carmichael made it clear to me how important the information I was looking after was, so I decided I needed help protecting it.

“I worked for Torchwood so I was fairly well protected.  I was also sure they would keep an eye on me for protecting their secrets, but I didn’t completely trust them.

“I figured that if someone wanted to get me they would get the data, they would have to study me.  They would have to know everything from my bank, to school, to medical records and details about my friends too.

“When my job looking after Davey was finished Wormstrom was just a theory like Fredericks said.  After I was approached by Mr Carmichael I went to see him and asked him to make Wormstrom real.

“I trusted him with all my information because I knew how he felt and I needed his help.  He made Wormstrom for me for a kiss,” Ianto’s voice was sad and Jack held him closer.

“It was kiss well given.  Why did it contact Archie and not me?” Jack asked.

“The version at the Hub may not have control but it’s an intelligent virus.  You are of importance to me so you can be used as a threat against me, so it learnt you.

“The Hub’s Wormstrom was warned by the Dolerig’s Wormstrom and it sent the message to Archie knowing you would probably respond to information from someone you knew, were you might not from an unknown.

“The Hub’s Wormstrom also knew Archie was a member of the Royal Order of Archivists.  That if I was in danger because of anything Mr Carmichael asked me to look after he was the best person to give you answers,” Ianto explained then he looked earnestly into Jack’s eyes.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner.  I hoped no one would know or care about the information I had.  Like everything else to do with London, I just wanted to forget.”

“You’re safe, your mine and I love you.  That’s what’s important to me and now I know I have a little help with keeping you safe,” Jack said kissed Ianto.

The Welshman didn’t ask Jack what he was going to do now that he knew what Wormstrom was.  It was another sign of trust what made the Immortal warm within his soul.

So Jack decided that having established that Ianto was safe he was going to make sure his fiancé knew how much he was Jack’s and how much he was loved.

 

 


	47. Chapter Forty-seven

Ianto was in a state of nervousness today that he hadn’t been in since he told Jack about Wormstrom.  His fiancé had left him to return to the Hub many times since then, but his return was always so loving that the Welshman’s fears had dies down.

Today though nervousness was back with a vengeance.  So much so that Jack wanted to stay, but Ianto insisted that he go and do what he needed to do.

This was something that Jack couldn’t face for him.  This was something he has brought upon himself and he didn’t intend to regret his decision.

Ianto cleaned the house and made his preparations to steady his nerves.  He could almost tell to the minute when his fate was going to catch him.

The door bell rang out and he answered it.

“What the hell is this?” the person on the doorstep said as soon as he opened the door.

“An invitation to my Civil Partnership,” Ianto answered inviting her inside.

“I can read that for myself.  I haven’t seen you since last Christmas and we only receive the occasional card and now this.

“Since when have you gone bender?  How did you meet?  What’s he like?  Is Jack a good man?  Are you happy?” his sister asked in a way that reminded him of Gwen, but without making him feel like the answers were none of her business.

“I’m not sure that it’s men, just him.  I mean he’s the only... and has been for a while.

“He’s my boss and we’ve sort of had a relationship for a few years now.  He’s very handsome and yes Jack’s a good man and I’m very happy,” Ianto replied nervously.

Rhiannon looked slightly stunned.  It was the most she’d heard Ianto say in some years, since their father died.

She looked at him carefully even though he shied from her scrutiny.  He looked unsure about something but she recognised his quiet determination.

“Are you coming?” Ianto asked quietly.

“Of course we’re bloody coming.  You just hardly tell me anything anymore that this has come as a surprise.  I’d like a chance to meet my future brother in law,” she said as though it was obvious.

“I’m glad,” Ianto answered smiling with relief.

“So do I get to meet him?” she asked.

“If you have time to wait?” Ianto said and she agreed.

Ianto lead her into the kitchen and made her some coffee.  He asked about Johnny and the kids and she comfortably told him everything.

A few hours later Ianto knew Jack was going to arrive.  He waited until he heard the key turn before leaving his sister in the lounge and going to see his fiancé.

“Hi,” Jack said and kissed him.  “You seem calmer than you were when I left this morning.”

“My sister’s here,” Ianto said suddenly feeling anxious again.

“That’s great I’d love to meet her,” Jack said feeling his lover’s relief.

“She’d like to meet you too,” Ianto said leading him into the lounge.

“Rhiannon this is Jack, Jack this is my sister Rhiannon,” he said as soon as they entered.

Rhiannon stood and they both eyed each other cautiously.  Jack smiled but Ianto’s sister shared her brother’s interrogative stare.

“I’ll just make some coffee,” he said politely and left before either could object.

“It’s nice to meet you,” Jack said pleasantly.

“Well you’re handsome I grant you that but are you good for him?” she asked.

“I intend to be ma’am,” Jack answered and received a Jones raised eyebrow.

“Has he told you much about us?” she asked.

“I know you have a husband, a son and daughter.  He’s very fond of you, even if he doesn’t show it.

“He told me once he didn’t think he belonged in the real world.  The work world he could handle but real life he didn’t feel connected to.

“He told me your father was a master tailor,” Jack raised his hand to stop her from speaking.  “I know, he worked in Debenhams but the lie suited him.

“I come across as being very flash and showy and he seems more like a tailor’s son, neat and precise, than a shop assistant’s son.  I think it was more to do with not letting anyone see how different he is.

“I get the impression things didn’t go as well with your father as he would have liked, so he made an ideal version of him in his head,” Jack concluded.

“Ianto was always clever but he’s quiet.  Dad wanted what was best and pushed him, I don’t think he realised he was alienating Ianto from the rest of us.

“When dad died, Ianto shut mum and me out, he withdrew.  You’ve changed him,” she said looking at him in the eye.

“Is that a good thing?” Jack asked uncertain.

“Perhaps, he’s never been this comfortable telling me anything.  I can see he’s happy and you mean a great deal to him, but if you hurt him, you’ll destroy him,” she said leaning closer, her voice low and slightly threatening.

“I promise you I don’t intend for anything to hurt him ever again, me least of all,” Jack answered.

Rhiannon straightened and scrutinised his face again.  Suddenly Jack felt very nervous.  He could tell that, now the preliminaries were out of the way, the interrogation was just beginning.

Ianto returned with coffee and a reassuring smile as Rhiannon Davies began to grill him about his family and work.

 


	48. Chapter Forty-eight

Rhiannon’s approval of their Civil Partnership made Ianto suddenly very relaxed.  Which was bizarre because for the next month he was focused on the most stressful things.

First there was the new house.  They chose it together, and chose the colour schemes inside, but it was left to Ianto to organise it.

Jack acknowledged that organisation was really Ianto’s forte and he had lots of things to organise himself, starting with handing Torchwood over to Gwen.  The more he gave the Welshwoman, the more he felt free.

Ianto got the notion into his head that they would spend their first night in their new house as their first night as a married couple.  Jack found the idea charming and organised a hotel room for himself to spend the last week of his bachelorhood.

While getting the house ready Ianto was also organising their Civil Partnership.  It was going to be a small affair with only those people who were most important to them attending.

Ianto invited his sister and her family as well as a few friends.  Jack invited Martha Jones and her family, as well as his daughter and grandson.  They also invited Gwen and Rhys and got Martha to invite the Doctor.

The Welshman organised everything from the registry office where the ceremony would take place, the private dining room for the reception, to their suits.

The only thing Jack wouldn’t let Ianto sort out was his vows and the inscription on his ring.  Both rings were the same style but they would have a different message of love.

It was a decision that made Ianto happy.  It seemed to the Immortal that Ianto had known as soon as he proposed exactly what he wanted to say, both in his vows and on his ring.  The Captain on the other hand spent a good month agonising about getting them just right.

There were only two slight hiccups and a major one in the smooth organisation of the Civil Partnership.  First was Jack’s getting to know Rhiannon’s family.

Ianto’s sister decided that she wanted her future brother-in-law to know the whole family.  Ianto was nervous about Jack meeting Johnny, but while the Welshman could be loud and slightly rude there was no malice and a lot of liveliness in him.

Jack was easily able to charm his lover’s family in ways that his fiancé could not.  Yet the affection of all the Davies’ for Ianto eased the Immortal’s heart.

Then came the awkwardness of meeting Jack’s daughter and grandson.  Ianto was younger than his daughter and became incredibly shy.

Ianto had the feeling that he hadn’t made a good impression and this was confirmed when Jack’s daughter later declined their invitation.  Jack was distraught and while Ianto made an effort to get her to change her mind, he was left with his mind reeling at her jealousy and anger.

The last slight hiccup was in meeting Martha Jones’ family.  While Jack’s own flesh and blood had rejected him, the Jones’ had adopted him and Francine grilled Ianto thoroughly on his suitability for the Immortal.

A few days after their arrival, the Doctor landed his TARDIS in Roald Dhal Plass.  It amused Ianto slightly that Francine gave the Time Lord a good talking too before he was allowed to talk to him.

He seemed somewhat subdued when he finally got to offer Ianto his congratulations.  The Welshman handed him the banana milkshake he made as soon as he saw Time Lord had been cornered and he was soon back to his hyperactive self.

Anxiety began to settle in a week before their Civil Partnership.  That was when Jack left Ianto’s house to stay in his hotel with the rest of their guests.

Rhiannon, who had learnt the lover’s plans, decided to combat her brother’s loneliness by offering to let him stay at her house.  Ianto protested but she was insistent, which meant that neither could sneak away to be with each other at night.

On the day they wore matching dark suits with white shirts and royal blue and gold waistcoats.  They had button holes with red roses and as soon as they saw each other they both just stared until someone shook them.

The ceremony went smoothly and they had already agreed that Jack was to say his vows first. 

“Ianto, you have brought such light into my life.  You have brought me happiness, love and healing that I never hoped to have.

“I promise to look after you, protect you always and love you forever.  I promise to keep all that you have taught me in my heart, to remain the person you have made me for the rest of my existence,” Jack said staring deep into Ianto’s eyes as if he was the only one there.

With each word Ianto’s heart flowed with deeper love.  Jack let his own feeling entwine until their hearts and souls were slow dancing together.

“There are no words adequate to say the difference you have made in my life Jack.  No promise that I can make that seems worthy.

“My heart and soul have long been yours.  I feel like I’m just shouting it out loud for all the world to hear,” Ianto hesitated uncertain how these words would be received.

To Jack they were perfect.  He couldn’t help but pounce forward so that his lips met Ianto’s.  Their arms wrapped around each other until a less than discrete coughing interrupted them.

“Sorry he’s just so irresistible,” Jack said making Ianto blush but he continued.

“I’m yours Jack; I never dreamed you would be mine.  I promise to always treasure and love you,” he said aloud while his feelings told Jack alone so much more.

They exchanged rings, Jack’s first.  Inside the band of gold he slipped upon Ianto’s finger was inscribed with _Forever my heart_.

Ianto’s was inscribed with _'m 'n dragwyddol cara_ , my eternal love.  Jack could tell that Ianto meant his ring not just as a token to bind them to their vows; it was intended as a reminder for Jack to keep love in his heart, even when the man who gave it was gone.

The rest became a blur, the signing of their contract, the reception afterwards, receiving congratulations and good wishes from their friends and getting to their new home.

Making love in their marital bed was special to both of them.  It was passionate, tender and said all the things not mentioned in their vows, but to them that night it was just as binding.

From the moment they first gazed upon each other that day to the moment they left on a plane for their honeymoon there was no rift activity and hardly any crime.  As with their first night in Glasgow, love was in the Cardiff air.

 


	49. Chapter Forty-nine

The choice of honeymoon destination was Jack’s.  Ianto was staring at his new husband too much to pay attention until they arrived by boat.

It was a tropical island.  There was a huge house, the size of a small hotel, with air conditioning.  Everything they could possibly want was there ready, but it was just the two of them.

It had everything from an indoor and outdoor pool to tennis courts.  There was a sauna, a huge kitchen, several large bedrooms, two studies and a lounge.

The house had its own generator plus back up, full satellite communications so that it could receive TV signals, connect to the internet and they could phone home.

There was also a helicopter pad, with helicopter and a boathouse with several boats and waterskiing and scuba equipment.

Then Jack began giving Ianto a tour of the island.  It had a beach and lush jungle, free of dangerous or poisonous animals but full of fresh fruit, it even had a spring with a small lake.

“What do you think?” Jack asked when the tour was finished in the master bedroom.

“It’s beautiful,” Ianto replied his voice replied in awe.

“Oh good, I was so afraid that I was being frivolous,” Jack said sighing with relief.

“Frivolous?” Ianto asked.

“I bought the island, we own it.  We still have the houses in York and Cardiff of course, but I thought we could come here when we want to get away.

“We’re not completely isolated, we can make arrangements for someone on the mainland to bring us supplies and look after the place while we’re away,” Jack said enthusiastically.

“But what about... I don’t understand how...” Ianto wasn’t sure if he wanted to ask the question because he was afraid of the answers.

“We’re not going back to Torchwood.  Gwen’s been doing a fine job without us and I made sure we had a full communications system when we arrived so that, if she needs our help, she can consult us.

“I want us to travel, to see all the beauty of the world.  I want us to do whatever we feel like, whatever we wish.

“I haven’t been going to Torchwood these last few months, I’ve been sorting out my licences, drivers, pilots, helicopter & aeroplane, boating, just to make legal what I’ve been doing for years.

“I think we should get a luxury yacht but I can’t decide if I want a big one with a crew or an intimate one for just to two of us,” Jack said seriously.

“Well I supposed the advantage of having a yacht for two is that when we’re out in the open sea we can walk around naked,” Ianto said deadpan.

“That’s also an advantage of having a tropical island to yourselves,” Jack said grinning.

“Why do I get the feeling that our grocery runs from the main land we’re going to be heavy on the suntan lotion and lube and light on the washing powder and fabric softener,” Ianto said with a raised eyebrow before being treated to the Jack Harkness grin and a series of deep passionate kisses.

Before they progressed to enjoying the benefits of a private island Jack stopped and looked at Ianto seriously.  The Welshman knew that his husband had had a point before he had been diverted that couldn’t wait.

“I’m Immortal Ianto, a fixed point in time and space who cannot die no matter what, but you’re mortal.  I don’t want to waste any second of my life with you.

“You see while I’m happy to travel the world for a few years, do whatever we like, enjoy being married that isn’t enough.  I realised when I met your sister’s family that having your heart and soul entwined with mine isn’t enough, I’d like, in a few years, to have your DNA entwined with mine as well,” Jack implored resting a hand upon his stomach.

“I thought, I thought that was too painful for you,” Ianto said, his voice letting Jack know it wasn’t physical pain he was worried about.

“I thought that love was too painful.  With you love is so wonderful I don’t think I will be content to just have a husband, I want a family too.

“I talked to the Doctor at the reception, he’s willing to take us into the future, find us somewhere safe in the fifty-first century where we can have a child, that is if you want one, if you want to come, if...” Jack was cut off when Ianto used his favourite babble preventative, a kiss.

It was a passionate kiss that told Jack that when he was ready for children, Ianto was more than happy to provide his DNA.  The Immortal returned it happily before his hands began to point out that they had plenty of practice time ahead.

When they were naked though it was Ianto’s turn to pull back.  He handed Jack a bottle of suntan lotion and gave him a look that commanded his husband to make sure it was well rubbed in everywhere.

Ianto did the same for Jack ignoring his moans when every inch was covered but further contact was denied.  The Welshman took his husband’s hand and led him downstairs to the back of the house.

When they stood before their jungle, the Immortal understood.  When he told Gwen Cooper that he would follow Ianto into paradise he hadn’t realised how literal he would be.

Ianto led his new husband though the lush green trees to a spot he had noticed on his tour.  There they made love, then held each other, before making love again; while the sun travelled the sky and the moon and stars came out.

 

Fin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope that you enjoyed this story. There will be a one-shot Christmas sequel which I will be posting soon. After that I will be posting A Favour for a Friend which is the sequel to both this story and answers some of the questions raised in Getting There in Time.  
> For those interested in the history of my writing. I mentioned at the beginning of this story that, because of Children of Earth, this became my Season 3. When I originally envisioned this story the show down with the Dolrigs and Fredericks etc was going to take place and they were the reason for all this happening (though I don't think I had thought up the names etc and I probably didn't have all the details in my head, though Wormstrom was always a part of the end). The bit that changed was that this was originally going to be a between series story with Jack and Ianto returning to Torchwood at the end. Their special night in Glasgow, York and their getting married (civil partnership) and leaving all stemmed from my desire to give these two a happier ending.


End file.
